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January 2013 Moms
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co-workers making you feel guilty? (vent)
after a 12 hour shift (night shift RN) of fairly constant INTENSE sometimes painful BH contractions and severe back pain (pinched nerve?) my doctor agreed to write me off of work at almost 38 weeks with the intention to induce me at 39w1d. We are super short staffed and everyone is making me feel like a jerk for leaving a week early since everyone else has worked up to their due date. I know I shouldn't care what they think but I really do feel bad for my co-workers and the strain this puts on staffing, but I seriously can barely walk. anyone else have co-workers making you feel bad ?
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Re: co-workers making you feel guilty? (vent)
TTC #1 Since 8/2010
Me: 34, DH: 35 DX: DOR (FSH 14.9, AMH 0.67, AFC ~10) and Egg Quality
IVF #1 Feb 2012. MDFL protocol w/ Met. 7 ER, 0F.
May Donor Egg IVF cycle:3 EF, 1 blast ET 5/12, 2 frosties
BFP 5/21! beta #1 5/22 306 beta #2 5/24 818 beta #3 5/31 15,038.
"Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are a good person is a little like expecting the bull not to attack you because you are a vegetarian." --Dennis Wholey
I'm a night shift RN too and we've been short staffed for almost 2 years. The way I see it is that I get 12 weeks of FMLA. If I go on leave early, I come back early. Either way, I'm gone 12 weeks, and they've known about it for 7 months, so they've had time to figure something out. I feel bad that they'll be short, yes, but that is kind of the norm now. We used to work sick all the time to prevent staffing from being worse, and have tremendous guilt about leaving each other short for whatever reason, but we've gotten past that. We're just over it. It is not the staff nurses' responsibility to ensure adequate staffing and sometimes we all just have to deal with it. We've all had bad shifts, but we've gotten through them, and barely any of them are actually memorable anymore - they were just hard at the time. They've known you'll be going on leave for a while, and one week is not going to make a difference, especially if you're still going to be gone for the same amount of time.
I'm a hospital 12 hour shift RN as well and I think you need to tell your coworkers to STFU.
While they might have all worked up until their due date, that doesn't mean anything....and I know that you can't be the only nurse who has had to stop early. Quit worrying and feeling guilty about not being able to care for others, you need to take care of yourself and your little one.
What I have learned after 7 years working on the floor and being a charge nurse is that, no matter how short staffed or bad it looks, the hospital will go on without you.
I get irked when co workers have this attitude like I'm getting away with something because I get 3 months "off"
It's not like I'll be watching TV and eating bon bons... okay so that may indeed happen.
I guess back when I didn't think I was going to have kids I got a little jealous of the long time off, as it's really hard to get that much time off if you're not having a baby.
I am going through the same thing! I am a preschool teacher and my co-teacher has been comparing my pregnancy to hers the entire time. Of course, her pregnancy was twice as hard but she did twice as much as I do. I am not even able to sit down for a minute without her going on about how she was twice the size of me and her feet swelled every day etc. etc. and how she was never able or never needed to take a break. It's become incredibly frustrating and difficult to work with.
Other co-workers are better, but my boss would have to be the worse. I have told her multiple times that I will be done at 38 weeks, but she continues to blow me off saying "We will see how you feel at the time... if you're feeling ok you can keep working!" She is also pressuring me to come back to work within 6-8 weeks. I keep telling her that I will be taking the 12 weeks but she keeps blowing me off.
Wow, sorry about all of this guys. To the last post, I'm surprised your boss is trying to pressure you to come back before 12 weeks. That's something I would be very careful about if I was a boss in charge. You have a right to your 12 weeks!
I'm a therapist at an inpatient rehabilitation hospital and my biggest complaint has been the hectic scheduling with the holidays. I'm working extra hard while lots of my co-workers are off for the holidays. (My choice, but I'm saving my time off.) I've found myself thinking, "Why oh why wasn't he due December 10?" However, I haven't been made to feel guilty about taking extra breaks or flexing my schedule for dr's appointments or anything. I'm still able to work right now, but it sure isn't easy. I work closely with RNs and I can see where the staffing would be a little bit harder for them where I work. But make sure you guys don't let it get to you! Take the time you deserve.
Unrelated but I don't know what I would do without my RN co-workers and the nursing techs who have helped me out during my pregnancy with things that are normally such an integral part of my job, such as moving heavy patients, etc. Kudos to RNs!
Only one of my co-workers is being a PIA about my pregnancy. She booked a long vacation out of the country right in the middle of my leave when I was 6 months pregnant and she constantly complains about the workload she'll need to cover while I'm out. My other co-workers have been great though - especially the one who is actually going to be responsible for covering my workload.
I'm not at all surprised by this. There's no way in hell that I would be allowed to take 12 weeks off. My boss acted like my partners were doing me a favor by approving 8 weeks.
And I agree with PPs ... Kudos to the RNs! I'm tired after work and I have a desk job. I couldn't imagine being a nurse right now. My feet might fall off!
Are you kidding me??? That is total bogus! I'm a 12 hour-shift RN as well and had to step down to 8 hours at 36 weeks and finally went off just right before Christmas. It was my turn to work Christmas this year and we were short to begin with during that time, but I had told my manager of my plan a LOOONNNG time ago...she should've looked into replacements beforehand, but of course left it to the last minute and everyone had to work short-staffed. I felt so bad but my coworkers were very supportive and were surprised that I even lasted that long.
It's hard work being an RN AND pregnant at the same time. We do a lot of walking, turning patients, assisting them in and out of bed, and in my case working in a Pediatric unit, having to fully take care of not one baby, but FOUR, while carrying my own in my tummy. That's from changing diapers, to feeding, to bathing, administering medication, tummy time, changing dressings, keeping them happy, etc. It's ALOT of work!!
I wouldn't worry at all what your coworkers think...they need to experience being pregnant while being on your feet and working shift work. They have no idea what it's like...honestly, you need to look after yourself AND your baby. There are times at the end of a 12 hour day where I only drank a few cups of water, only peed once, skipped my supper, and still got out late. NOT GOOD when you're pregnant!!