breast feeding...

heavenpaige · December 2012

i know its a little early but what is everyone planning to do with this LO?

i never breastfed before (2 sons) but am seriously considering it this time. my dh is kind of against it, but cant really tell me why. i think it really should be up to me since with the previous 2 babies he doesnt really feed or change them anyway.

can i get some pros and cons on this subject? (maybe why or why not you are doing it)

sheacox · December 2012

why would your hubby be against providing your baby with perfectly designed nutrition? this is a personal decision which has been discussed a lot. you will find various opinions. Most women seem to feel that each woman needs to make her own choice. I'm a FTM but do plan to breast feed. Due to my job, etc, it will be extremely hard to attempt to do it past 6 months but i'll try and we will see. I'm sure many 2TMs will comment on their experiences as well.... but i would also say you are your hubby could do some more research on breast feeding cause i do find it odd he is so against it with no real reason.

megandchase · December 2012

I plan to this is my first so no previous experience. My mom could not produce enough milk to bf my sisters and I but I'm hoping I will. My DH thinks it's a bigger deal than I do, he really wants me to. I thinks pros are health, bonding with baby, cheaper and help with the baby weight loss! Do what you are comfortable with!

tiffletons518 · December 2012

With my first, I didn't even try. I was young, nobody I knew had ever done it, and I think I thought it would be impossible being as I was working full time. My with second I decided to do it. She was jaundice because my milk didn't come in till 5 days pp. I had latching issues, my supply sucked, and she was constantly attached to me. I barely slept which made taking care of my oldest very hard. I eventually had to start supplementing with formula, and finally just switched over. I had a mental breakdown in front of her pediatrician, and she was amazing. She said, that I tried and ANY breast milk she got from me was better than nothing. And, she said that if I was not mentally healthy that wasn't good for baby either. She made me feel like I wasn't a failure, which was wonderful. By the time I had my second I knew women that had done it and they all had no problems, made it seem like it was the easiest thing in the world. The best advice I would give is, to try it. But, don't feel like a failure if you have trouble with it. A LOT of women have trouble, but you generally don't hear from those women because I think they feel like they must have done something wrong. I will probably try again hoping I have better luck this time, but I won't beat myself up this time if it doesn't work out the way I hoped. Any time spent breast feeding, no matter how short, is better than no time at all.

jlml2008 · December 2012

I breasted my first and plan to breast feed this one. Having a support system is huge when you're a FTM whether it ends up being your husband, a friend or your mom. The first month or so of learning and adjusting can be really hard and I think without support I may have given up. My first had latch issues an other problems and we didn't fully Get the hang of it or a while.

I am definitely pro breast feeding but I would ask your husband to research it more and fully decide why he is against or for it. His support is not necessarily required but it is a huge help as a FTM

heavenpaige · December 2012

tiffletons518:
With my first, I didn't even try. I was young, nobody I knew had ever done it, and I think I thought it would be impossible being as I was working full time. My with second I decided to do it. She was jaundice because my milk didn't come in till 5 days pp. I had latching issues, my supply sucked, and she was constantly attached to me. I barely slept which made taking care of my oldest very hard. I eventually had to start supplementing with formula, and finally just switched over. I had a mental breakdown in front of her pediatrician, and she was amazing. She said, that I tried and ANY breast milk she got from me was better than nothing. And, she said that if I was not mentally healthy that wasn't good for baby either. She made me feel like I wasn't a failure, which was wonderful. By the time I had my second I knew women that had done it and they all had no problems, made it seem like it was the easiest thing in the world. The best advice I would give is, to try it. But, don't feel like a failure if you have trouble with it. A LOT of women have trouble, but you generally don't hear from those women because I think they feel like they must have done something wrong. I will probably try again hoping I have better luck this time, but I won't beat myself up this time if it doesn't work out the way I hoped. Any time spent breast feeding, no matter how short, is better than no time at all.

very well said! thanks for the advice. i know that i am able to get a pump (like a rented one) and i would def prefer that over actually breastfeeding...mainly bc we go to dh's parents house alot (especially it being a summer baby) and i dont feel comfortable doing it in front of them and they have no place for me to really go sit down and relax to do it either. (plus i do have 2 older boys who will be 4.5yrs and 2.5 yrs old at this LO's birth) i guess trying is all i can do. thanks again.

skio · December 2012

It's a proven fact that breast feeding is nutritionally best for baby. But that doesn't mean you have to do it.

I BF'd DD for 14m and I loved it, but I was lucky and had no problems. Pros are that it's free, easy, good for bonding, very little cleanup unless you pump a lot. Cons are that you can't have anyone else take a feeding for you, which can be tiring, and it can be painful at the start and you never know if your supply will be sufficient, and as some pps showed, that can be rough emotionally. Also, you have to still be mindful of what you are eating and drinking. The biggest compromise for me was not being able to go anywhere for a long period of time unless I had a place to pump. I couldn't go to a football game or into the city to meet friends. But most things are manageable; I just brought a pump and pumped either in the car or a private room.

It's your decision and you should feel confident in whatever you choose. Definitely weigh your options and talk to your H if you want to try BFing. GL!

InsyNCurtis · December 2012

I BFd my son for 12 months and it was great for us. A support system is HUGE but you can do it without one. I didn't have a great sysem... my husband was very supportive but much of my family was not.

When we first left the hospital, my son decided he wasn't going to latch anymore... we fought it for almost 2 weeks and I pumped exclusively so he still only got breastmilk. We finally went back to a LC, who helped us tremendously and we had a perfect nursing relationship after that.

Then around 8 months, he stopped gaining weight. His pedi was not helpful. He told us the problem was that my milk had stopped producing calories and we needed to supplement or switch to formula. Yea, that didn't work. My son had clearly developed a preference and wouldn't have any part of the formula. We ended up seeing a GI specialist who said there was nothing wrong with him and we continued to nurse on demand and increased his solids. He is now back to gaining perfectly. He is just a peanut

Long and short of it is this: nursing can be a challenge but for us every challenge and obstacle was worth every bit of it. I would definitely make sure you have some sort of support system because you are going to need it - this can be family, your H, a BFing support group, LCs at the hospital. I definitely plan to nurse again.

SacredFireMomma · December 2012

My first was solely breastfed for the first year of her life despite my MIL being verbally against it. The reason why I chose to do this is that their little tummies are not fully developed when solids are normally introduced.

Today, two years later, she still breastfeeds a lot. According to the World Health Organization, it is healthy to breastfeed up to the age of 3. However, I am having some discomfort with breast tenderness when she starts to nurse. As I see it, this time is fleeting and if I can make my peace with it, tandem breastfeeding is great for sibling bonding.

Men may have difficulty confronting nursing because breasts are mainly seen as sexual in our society. It becomes uncomfortable for them to see our breasts as they were intended. No matter what you chose, be true to you and your baby's needs. Best of luck!

+Preppy+ · December 2012

I breastfed DS up until recently, 9 months. Pregnancy has completely dried up my supply. DS gets a few ounces everyday of BM but is mostly on formula.

Feeding him formula has reaffirmed my love for breastfeeding. Formula is expensive, stinky, and a lot of clean up. I HATE having to make a bottle when I'm barely awake. It's so much easier to pick up the kid and put him on the boob. Breastmilk is free. You don't have to heat it up or clean bottles (unless pumping). By the time he was 5 months old, he ate for about 10 min every 3 hours. That was it. It got so easy.

This next kid will be breastfed at least a year. I miss it so much. I had some issues with breastfeeding at first, but I am so happy I got through it. My advice is to know your breastfeeding resources before you have a baby. I had the number to a birthing center with LCs. When I was severely engorged with bleeding nipples, they helped me make it through the tough first few weeks.

ChristyD6 · December 2012

I'm a FTM and I have always assumed that I would BF as much as I am able for all th health benefits. Some of my friends have had great experiences and others not great so I'm trying not to set the expectation for myself that if I don't make it to a specific time that I'm not doing enough for my child. I would love to make it 6mo to a year. I work and pumping will be a challenge so if I have a mental breakdown, baby will eat something else.

SacredFireMomma · December 2012

Oh, of course! I am not suggesting that it all ends at 3! I just wanted to give a guideline rather than my 'go until they are done with it' opinion.

And I stand corrected. The WHO website recommends breastfeeding for two years and beyond.

My doula was breastfed until she was four and said she stopped when she decided she was done.

MoparWife67 · December 2012

I plan to. I'm still nursing DS too so I will likely be tandem nursing.

My best suggestion is start researching and reading about it and figure out pros and cons for yourself, because its such a personal decision it's hard to say pros and cons will be universal from one person to the next.

I really liked Ina May's Guide to Breastfeeding and The Womanly Art of Breastfeeding. Kellymom.com is also an excellent resource and the libraries usually have those books.

xuxachi · December 2012

I breast fed my DS for 11 months and had very few problems. It was a bit more challenging for the first few months because they nurse alot and are slow, but after that, it was so convenient and I enjoyed the little break to do it. In my mommy circles there are about 1/2 who BF and 1/2 who did formula, and it's really just a personal choice. I don't see why you wouldn't give it a go and see how it works for you and your LO since it's better for them, cheaper and more convenient. If it doesn't work for you, then go to formula.

To be balanced, the pros of bottle feeding is that you are more in control of the feeding and know exactly how much they are getting, which can be a constant worry when you're BF. Dads can also feed, but one way around that is to pump enough so the baby takes a bottle of breastmilk a day.

A fabulous website on breastfeeding information is kellymom.com. You and your DH might want to check it out.

Dumbledore · December 2012

Definitely BFing again, in fact I cannot wait to do it, it's one of the things I'm most looking forward to about this one being born.

That's sad that your husband is against it - if you choose to try you are going to need his support more than anyone, so I would try to get him to open his mind to it.

tiffletons made a good point - it can be VERY hard, and many people don't talk about that. But honestly, after you get it down (if you stick with it) it gets so easy. Like PPs have said - way easier to just pop baby on the boob than make a bottle of formula. BFing is free and built in, formula is expensive, stinks, bottles are expensive, and it's all a lot more work to make/wash/etc.

At the end of the day though - if you try, you have succeeded, IMO. If it doesn't work for you, that doesn't mean you failed. As long as you give it your all, then you have already done the best you can for your baby, and you should never feel bad about that! I see too many BFing moms say they feel like they failed their baby (and they all use the word fail) if they didn't make it as long as they wanted to. That is crazy talk. You breastfed your baby at all - that's all that matters. No failure there.

carmen_sandiego · December 2012

I breastfed my daughter for 14 months and will breastfeed this one as well.

I have to take issue with people who say breastfeeding is free and easy. It CAN be... but in a lot of cases it is neither. As Dumbledore said it's really, really hard at the beginning. It hurts even if baby has a good latch (just for the first 10-30 seconds and just for a couple of weeks, but still), there is a steep learning curve if you are both doing it for the first time (and even if you have done it before--you're still learning how to breastfeed your unique baby and baby is learning how to breastfeed period). It's pretty constant and it's harder to be portable at first for many women. I know it took me about 3-4 months before DD was reliable about breastfeeding out of the house; she was really finicky and we had a lot of BFing in public type troubles due to her preferences.

Now, once you have been doing it for some time it gets much easier. For me it was easier every day and by about 3-4 months it was a breeze. But you have to climb a mountain to get there. I say breastfeeding BECOMES easy but I don't say it IS easy because it's just not at first.

It is also not free, especially if you work. I have probably $150-$200 worth of nursing bras and tanks, including sleep bras; I paid about $8 per month for nursing pads; I bought a $200 breast pump so I could work (this is optional, if you are a SAHM you can get away without it); breastmilk storage bags; 2 breastfeeding pillows at $40 apiece... I could go on. The milk itself is free and you don't have to buy all the add-ons, but most of the ones I listed are fairly essential. It adds up. I calculated that I spent about as much on breastfeeding supplies as I would have on 6-8 months of formula. It was cheaper for me since I breastfed 14 months and will hopefully reuse all my stuff to breastfeed the second one, but still, it was far from free.

I really, really loved breastfeeding after I got past all the hurdles and I look forward to doing it again. But I also think it's important for moms to know that there are some downsides and to be aware of what those downsides are.

I also think that while breastfeeding is better for the baby, a happy and sane mom is the most important thing, bar none, for an infant, so if switching to formula gets you there, then do it and never look back. It is a totally fine and perfectly healthy choice.

Kelli3 · December 2012

Unless there's some sort of medical issue I cannot understand why anyone would say they definitely are not going to give bfing a try. Even if it only lasts a week or less, at least try. The health benefits alone are reason enough. I have been lucky enough to have both my previous kids be great bf'ers and even working full time I bf the, both for exactly a year.

bumpuser8448316 · December 2012

I exclusively breastfed DS until 15 months so I could go back on my medication (I have rheumatoid arthritis) and will breastfeed this baby for as long as I can as well.

I'm not even going to touch the fact that your DH is against it because I don't have the energy for it today.

courty625 · December 2012

I'm a FTM so I don't have much advice but I am planning on at least trying. My mom wasn't able to BF me because of latching and supply issues. She was very young and did not have a support system.

As the other FTMs have said, Im going in with an open mind. I know it may not be easy and that it will be demanding at first, but I want to try it. If it doesn't work, that's ok too. I don't want to give up, but the most important thing to me is that baby eats. If its breast milk, all the better! I initially had the feelings that I wouldn't because if I couldn't it would be a failure. I've been doing some research and feel more confident with the decision. My cousin gave me some awesome handouts from ameda.com. They were very informative and I plan to keep them on hand.

I also never really thought to discuss it with my family. But he has quickly learned that my body is for much, much more than his sexual pleasure (not that's it all was before, but ya know what I mean). It is growing and nurturing our child. I can't imagine he would dare to say something negative about me wanting to do this.

bumpuser8448316 · December 2012

MeghanKG:
QueSyrah:
I exclusively breastfed DS until 15 months so I could go back on my medication I have rheumatoid arthritis and will breastfeed this baby for as long as I can as well.I'm not even going to touch the fact that your DH is against it because I don't have the energy for it today.
I wouldn't make OP feel bad because her husband is against it. No need for that. I think most men are uneducated about pregnancy in general and probably don't know a whole lot about breast feeding. If its important to you to breast feed, do some research and show it to your husband. Chances are he'll trust you to do what's best. Luckily, my husband has a "your body, you know what's best" approach to most things pregnancy related. Men are trained to think of breasts as sexual objects so I'm honestly not surprised to hear that he's a little iffy about it. He'll get over that pretty quick I think.

It wasn't meant to make the OP feel bad. Sorry if I offended you OP.

Edited because I don't want to be "that" person.

KatInTheHat28 · December 2012

I breastfed DS until he was 10 mos old when I chose to wean him. I had been pumping at work for 7 months by that time and I was done. I never really enjoyed breast feeding and I know that puts me in the minority. I was proud to have made it that far.

I set small goals for myself so it didnt feel as daunting. First goal was one week, second goal was six weeks, third goal was three months, etc. Just take it a day or a week at a time so you don't get overwhelmed.

RedLipstick69 · December 2012

This is my first baby and I definitely plan on breast feeding. I would like to both breast snag bottle feed for a smooth transition when I go back to work. I feel like I will be providing my baby with the best nutrition and bonding time a well.

hst · December 2012

I breast fed my first, and will do it again. It is hard at first but SO worth it. My hospital had a group that met once a week it was a life saver for me. You will save so much money too!

skio · December 2012

carmen_sandiego:
I have to take issue with people who say breastfeeding is free and easy. It CAN be... but in a lot of cases it is neither. As Dumbledore said it's really, really hard at the beginning. It hurts even if baby has a good latch just for the first 1030 seconds and just for a couple of weeks, but still, there is a steep learning curve if you are both doing it for the first time and even if you have done it beforeyou're still learning how to breastfeed your unique baby and baby is learning how to breastfeed period. It's pretty constant and it's harder to be portable at first for many women. I know it took me about 34 months before DD was reliable about breastfeeding out of the house; she was really finicky and we had a lot of BFing in public type troubles due to her preferences. Now, once you have been doing it for some time it gets much easier. For me it was easier every day and by about 34 months it was a breeze. But you have to climb a mountain to get there. I say breastfeeding BECOMES easy but I don't say it IS easy because it's just not at first.It is also not free, especially if you work. I have probably 150200 worth of nursing bras and tanks, including sleep bras; I paid about 8 per month for nursing pads; I bought a 200 breast pump so I could work this is optional, if you are a SAHM you can get away without it; breastmilk storage bags; 2 breastfeeding pillows at 40 apiece... I could go on. The milk itself is free and you don't have to buy all the addons, but most of the ones I listed are fairly essential. It adds up. I calculated that I spent about as much on breastfeeding supplies as I would have on 68 months of formula. It was cheaper for me since I breastfed 14 months and will hopefully reuse all my stuff to breastfeed the second one, but still, it was far from free.

I was the one who specifically said free and easy. I was trying to give a simplified overall comparison in that it's way easier to put a kid to the breast whenever/wherever than prep/heat/cleanup formula, and that price wise, it will almost always save you money over formula, but you're right, I shouldn't imply that it'll be either of those things for everyone. Since you got wicked detailed about your specific experience, I will, too. Not for argument's sake, just to show the flip side, because like you said, it CAN be easy, and it was very near both easy and free for me.

I agree with the point that no one should expect it to be free nor easy, but I also dont think anyone should expect it to be very difficult or equal to the cost of 6 to 8 months' worth of formula. In my opinion, that's excessive. My experience is certainly not typical, but I can't imagine that your specific experience with cost is, either.

I did mention pain and time compromises as cons. I have two friends who had difficulties BFing, so I'm not blind to what can happen. But I will also reiterate that I, for one, was extremely lucky in my BFing journey in that it was only painful on one side for a couple of days. After that, nada. I also was lucky in that DD was on a three hour feeding schedule within a month because of my good supply and her great latch. Were there days she'd want to nurse more often? Sure. But I don't remember being inhibited by needing to learn her schedule or preferences. I can truly, honestly say that BFing was easy for me from the beginning. I think it's absolutely important for first timers to be aware of the possible issues, but it doesn't hurt to share a story like mine so they also know it may be a breeze. Don't expect it, but hope for it because it CAN happen? Sure. I want the moms who are thinking about giving it a try to know that it's not a painful uphill battle for everyone.

Regarding the cost, I spent 45 bucks on three nursing bras, and the only regular expense I had was breastmilk storage bags, because I pumped and donated regularly. I had a hand me down pump; and FWIW, pumps should be covered by most insurance in the new year. I didn't need breast pads after the first month, didn't buy any nursing tanks or shirts; I kind of think they're a waste. My nursing pillow was a shower gift. So, I spent maybe a months' worth of formula on BFing.

So, yeah. Just another experience to consider; trying to be encouraging but not unrealistic. I loved everything about breastfeeding and can only hope to be lucky again next time, and will hope for everyone here that it goes well for them.

CynthiaC1213 · December 2012

I think it's worth it to do the research and read breastfeeding books to help you decide. For me, I plan to try breastfeeding and would love to be able to do it for as long as my baby wants to. That said, I know that this may be difficult or impossible, so I will try not to feel badly if I can't do it.

jaymiegerard · December 2012

Breast milk is the healthiest thing you can give your baby. For the sake of baby's health, I don't know why your husband would be against it, but some people have issues b/c of weird things they read or hear. Some men are also jealous of baby getting their wife's breasts (though in my opinion, they're here for baby first, partner second).

Now, that being said, some women can't breastfeed and choose not to, and I think that's totally fine too. Every woman can decide what works for her and her family.

I say give it a go, but seriously give it at least 5 weeks to get through the learning curve. If you hate it you can always stop, but at least you won't have to wonder. Keep in mind the first few weeks can feel overwhelming and even painful sometimes but once that period is over it's really wonderful.

I am still nursing my 16 month old. He has never been sick (baby gets all mom's antibodies for the length of their nursing relationship), I can ALWAYS soothe him, no matter how upset he is and no matter why he is upset, and I know that one of his sources of nutrition is completely natural.

I plan to nurse this next one and depending on if my son is ready to wean, I may end up nursing both at the same time!

Jtaxson · December 2012

I will bf with baby 2. I had it pretty easy with 1. DH did not have an opinion so after he realized how much easier it was on him, he was totally on board. It was very painful for about 10 days early on between the cramps I experienced while nursing and nipple soreness. It was uncomfortable for a few weeks following but all in all manageable. He had such a great latch that I could literally nurse him while doing chores around the house which meant I wasn't married to a 20 minute bottle feeding session every 3 hours. My guy was a chunked, gaining nearly a lb a week and eating almost 40 oz a day! I was back to prepreg weight in less than a month burning 20 calories per oz I created! Unfortunately, about a month after I returned to work my supply nearly dried up and that was the end of nursing. I had almost a months supply frozen and so we almost made it to the 6 month mark where studies have proven breast milk for the first 6 months promotes digestive and several other health benefits. Good luck with whatever you decide to do, either way there are pros and cons!

carmen_sandiego · December 2012

skio:
I was the one who specifically said free and easy. I was trying to give a simplified overall comparison in that it's way easier to put a kid to the breast whenever/wherever than prep/heat/cleanup formula, and that price wise, it will almost always save you money over formula, but you're right, I shouldn't imply that it'll be either of those things for everyone. Since you got wicked detailed about your specific experience, I will, too. Not for argument's sake, just to show the flip side, because like you said, it CAN be easy, and it was very near both easy and free for me. I agree with the point that no one should expect it to be free nor easy, but I also dont think anyone should expect it to be very difficult or equal to the cost of 6 to 8 months' worth of formula. In my opinion, that's excessive. My experience is certainly not typical, but I can't imagine that your specific experience with cost is, either.

Sorry, Skio! I promise I wasn't trying to pick on you. I have some residual anger (LOL) at all the lactivists who told me ONLY the good parts of breastfeeding when I was pregnant and then I had a really harsh slap on the face when reality hit. I just feel like I was never given both sides of the story--I try not to be a Debbie Downer but I do try to be objective when people ask because there are a lot of cons and some of the pros aren't all that they seem to be.

I will say that I had a pretty typical experience among moms I know with breastfeeding expenses. I maybe could have cut back, especially if I was a SAHM, but I also could have spent way more on nursing covers, a handsfree pumping bra, the Freestyle pump, etc. I also have another friend who was gung-ho about breastfeeding her first and did so for four months. When she went in for her son's 4 month appointment she found out that he had only gained 1 lb since his two month appointment despite having plenty of wet and dirty diapers. So not only did she shell out for tons of gear she could not use past four months, she had a terrible sense of guilt and shame and sobbed in the formula aisle when she had to make the switch for her son's health. Nobody should ever have to go through that.

Anyway, I appreciate your response to me. I will say that I had a super easy time breastfeeding. I had no latch problems, no supply problems... my biggest problem was DD would not take a bottle and I did struggle with feeling so physically tied to her in those early months, but that is not too common of a problem with breastfed babies. It was a lovely thing and I look forward very much to doing it with my second child. Overwhelmingly, it was a positive experience and I am sorry if I focused too much on the negatives in my OP.

I guess I just feel like I ONLY heard about the positives when I was a FTM, so I feel like I want to give that fuller perspective, if only because moms who EXPECT it to be free and easy from the get-go will be more easily discouraged if and when it DOESN'T turn out to be free and easy and be more likely to say "I'm doing it wrong" or "I'm bad at this" and give up. I think that's just as important as encouraging moms to do it.

Cjamantha · December 2012

I am a stm and plan to bf this lo.I bf my first child but it didnt last long I had the worst time getting him to latch so I pumped my milk for three months and did just fine after that but this time I feel like I have more support from dh so i feel way better about trying to bf again and I hope it works out this time. I do agree with you it is your choice but it really helps when you have a good support system.

ambah · December 2012

Well I think I am the first on this one, but I am actually going to bottle feed from day one. I was bottle fed, and I have nothing against it -I turned out great I think lol (and nothing against breastfeeding either).

Personally for me, the idea of BF causes a lot of stress for me, my husband is extremely supportive and understands that it is my body and he respects whatever decision. Atleast now he will be able to help with the feeding, which will be nice cause I will be able to sleep more, and he will also be able to have special bonding time too.

For myself, there are more pros to bottle feeding, once I made the decision, I felt a huge weight off my shoulders and a layer of stress just taken off. I know people will judge, but there is no right or wrong in this situation, it is what is best for everyone involved. Just do what is right for you Smile

DESTINYSARA · December 2012

Well, this is my first and I plan to bf.

My reasons are this. This is what I have been told by docs and have seen from personal experience.

It is the best food out there for a newborn. Your milk has anitbodies and vitamins that formula doesnt have. granted, it does have essential goodness to it, it still pales in comparison to what you already possess.
Breastfed babies are healthier than formula babies. My mom had an infection when my brother was 2wks old. She had to stop bf.My brother, my sister and I all went to the same school, lived in the same house and had the same friends. My sis and I got a cold once a year and other than that, we were very healthy. My brother got sick 4 or 5 times a year. If Kat and me got a 3 day cold, he got the week long flu. Our Pedi. said that his immune system would never be as strong as me and Kat's because we were breastfed for a year and over for me. Even his bones are weaker than ours,I've suffered more falls but he has suffered more breaks in less time. My two nieces are ff, they also always have colds it seems.
It is a bonding experience, babies bond better over the breast than a bottle. It's skin contact.
Saves money and time. I will be a sahm so there is no point in a pump or bottles(though we'll buy some anyway). There is no need for cans upon cans of fomula which is expensive. Also, the breast is already mixed and warmed up to the proper temp. It was a nightmare to feed my nieces who couldnt wait the 2 min it took to make their bottles, much more if they had to be washed first. Pure hell at 2am in the dark.
breast milk is easy to eat for lo, bf babes have less gas and tummy troubles.

skio · December 2012

carmen_sandiego:
skio:
I was the one who specifically said free and easy. I was trying to give a simplified overall comparison in that it's way easier to put a kid to the breast whenever/wherever than prep/heat/cleanup formula, and that price wise, it will almost always save you money over formula, but you're right, I shouldn't imply that it'll be either of those things for everyone. Since you got wicked detailed about your specific experience, I will, too. Not for argument's sake, just to show the flip side, because like you said, it CAN be easy, and it was very near both easy and free for me.

I agree with the point that no one should expect it to be free nor easy, but I also dont think anyone should expect it to be very difficult or equal to the cost of 6 to 8 months' worth of formula. In my opinion, that's excessive. My experience is certainly not typical, but I can't imagine that your specific experience with cost is, either.
 Sorry, Skio! I promise I wasn't trying to pick on you. I have some residual anger (LOL) at all the lactivists who told me ONLY the good parts of breastfeeding when I was pregnant and then I had a really harsh slap on the face when reality hit. I just feel like I was never given both sides of the story--I try not to be a Debbie Downer but I do try to be objective when people ask because there are a lot of cons and some of the pros aren't all that they seem to be.
I will say that I had a pretty typical experience among moms I know with breastfeeding expenses. I maybe could have cut back, especially if I was a SAHM, but I also could have spent way more on nursing covers, a handsfree pumping bra, the Freestyle pump, etc. I also have another friend who was gung-ho about breastfeeding her first and did so for four months. When she went in for her son's 4 month appointment she found out that he had only gained 1 lb since his two month appointment despite having plenty of wet and dirty diapers. So not only did she shell out for tons of gear she could not use past four months, she had a terrible sense of guilt and shame and sobbed in the formula aisle when she had to make the switch for her son's health. Nobody should ever have to go through that.
Anyway, I appreciate your response to me. I will say that I had a super easy time breastfeeding. I had no latch problems, no supply problems... my biggest problem was DD would not take a bottle and I did struggle with feeling so physically tied to her in those early months, but that is not too common of a problem with breastfed babies. It was a lovely thing and I look forward very much to doing it with my second child. Overwhelmingly, it was a positive experience and I am sorry if I focused too much on the negatives in my OP.
I guess I just feel like I ONLY heard about the positives when I was a FTM, so I feel like I want to give that fuller perspective, if only because moms who EXPECT it to be free and easy from the get-go will be more easily discouraged if and when it DOESN'T turn out to be free and easy and be more likely to say "I'm doing it wrong" or "I'm bad at this" and give up. I think that's just as important as encouraging moms to do it.

Sorry I had to quote this whole thing to say this but...I'm lazy. No need to be sorry and I think we're in agreement on the subject! Cheers. :]

ohdrama09 · January 2013

I will be BF this baby. I nursed DD for 17 months. If I have the same supply issues I had with DD we'll be using donor BM instead of formula again. If I can give my baby the best even if it's not directly from me I'm going to.

Want a personalized experience?

breast feeding...

Re: breast feeding...

Choose Another Board

Search Boards