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February 2012 Moms
poobear2015
member
Holiday Hoopla - vents from Christmas anyone?
poobear2015
member
I know we had a MIL wed edition - but did we have a random vent thread? If so - sorry for the repeat (I've been away from the bump a lot this week).
It makes me mad when family members take over my kid. DH's cousin does this consistently! At christmas eve, Hayley opened her present on my lap and it was a laugh and learn puppy. She instantly took her off my lap with the dog and took her over to her husband to play and show her how it worked. Then they ripped the darn thing open! THis was the 3rd house we'd been to for christmas already - what if we had already gotten it?! And they ended up throwing away the cd that comes with it.
Well - we got the same dog an hour later at our 4th stop - and I wanted the cd, so we opened that one too. We now have 2 dogs.
I love my grandmother to pieces - and she is pretty sick these days. Well we had christmas eve at her house. None of her clocks were right. NONE! So DH says "we need to leave at 7". I thought we had a half hour - no - we had 10 min. So I didn't bother to say anything when my grandma got up to rest in her bedroom. We hadn't even done presents. So now I feel like I rushed christmas for everyone by passing out gifts while she was trying to rest. She should not have had a huge party at her house. A low key event with random in/out visits would have been much better for her health.
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Re: Holiday Hoopla - vents from Christmas anyone?
HATE this too. I really feel like I should never complain about my family or DH's. They are all really really really great and would do anything for us, even if they are all a little overwhelming at times. So, I try not to complain on this board about them. But, my MIL has been staying with us for the holidays and has definitely tried taking over on numerous occasions. Especially when it comes to meals. DD has been very picky lately and meals are hit or miss. It makes it even worse when everyone is in the kitchen playing and distracting her and then trying to feed her when my attempts don't work. Seriously, who would eat with five hands shoving stuff in their face?
Also, I don't mind giving DD the occasional sweet snack and letting her have fun during the holidays. I let her try cookies and a candy cane. But, it's my choice and I want to do it. MIL followed her around the house trying to shove a sugar cookie in her mouth yesterday. She didn't even want it! But she kept shoving it in her face!
My grandpa yelled at DD about 5 times on Christmas Eve. I don't yell at her ever and these things he yelled at her for, I wouldn't even bat an eye at. She burst into tears every time. Yet, he kept doing it. We went over to their house last night, and my grandpa yelled "No" at her and she lost it again. He sometimes babysits for us and this makes me really uneasy about that. It's his tone of voice, I think. It is too stern and I think DD is really confused because I would never tell her not to do what he is stopping her from doing.
My MIL wants there to be eleventy billion presents under the tree for everyone. A sweet enough sentiment, but it means she buys a bunch cheap-o, dollar-store stuff that nobody will ever use. Seriously, each year I get a crappy makeup set (I *have* to buy special makeup because my skin is sensitive, she knows this), one or two of those bargain body wash/spongie/perfume sets, and a hair brush among other things that I don't need. It's just "filler" stuff so it looks like there's a ton of presents. Seriously, the gifts fill her entire living room. I've been told by other family members that goes into debt each year, and spends the entire year paying off Christmas because of this. Hubs and I have both told her several times that we would each be more than happy with one gift apiece.
In their efforts to be "fair" (you know, since they totally dont ever play favorites! ::eyeroll::) MIL and FIL buy both of their sons exactly the same things for Christmas. They buy both of their DILs exactly the same things for Christmas. Both of the babies got the same things for Christmas. When the babies are older, they'll buy Aria the same exact things as BIL's stepdaughters, and the other baby the same things as my other nephew, J. The only thing that varies is the color of some of the items.
I should just be grateful that I'm getting gifts, I know. But this is a little tiring. Buy us each something you know we'd really like/need. Don't put yourself into debt over Christmas gifts! That is NOT the reason for the season.
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My sister and BIL stayed with us for two weeks, and just left yesterday. They are a little weird, and take everything very personally, so we have been walking on eggshells the last two weeks trying not to upset them.
Also, my sister kept acting like she was hosting her own Christmas at our house, rather than being a guest at our Christmas. She got really mad when I said we didn't have time to bake on Christmas Eve (I direct several church music groups- we were at church from noon-11pm), because we would want to have cookies to give to our guests. I was tired and fed up, so I told her that SHE didn't have any guests, that she WAS the guest. She didn't talk to me for 12 hours (although, she would carry J around and talk to him while she wasn't talking to me, which made me furious).
Also, her husband doesn't speak English very well, so they speak Macedonian at home. She kept insisting on talking to J in Macedonian, and then not telling me what she'd said. I know he didn't understand her, either, but it's the principle of the thing.
We have a very 'help yourself' policy for family guests in our house- yet SHE kept walking around offering everyone drinks, and raiding our cupboards for snacks to serve to people (which no one really wanted) and openly suggesting to people that I was ignoring them.
We tried to keep Christmas dinner very low key. She insisted on making one dish that took longer to make than the rest of our dinner combined, and that pushed our schedule back so late it was J's bedtime by the time dinner was ready. And then, that one dish was ALL she would eat, despite the fact that we planned the whole dinner around what she wanted.
Also, she and BIL had to be touching J constantly when they were playing with him. He wasn't allowed to stand on his own, and they kept redirecting him away from what he wanted to play with to what they wanted him to play with. This is childish and dumb, I know, but he is SO close to walking, and I blame the fact that it hasn't happened in the last two weeks on the fact that he hasn't had a chance to be independent in the last two weeks.
Phew! Congrats if you made it to the end of this. Apparently I needed to vent!!
What they do in their own home is their own business (but SUCKS in your sister's case, jmccall), but they should be speaking a language that you can understand when staying in your home unless they're in their room alone. I think this was incredibly disrespectful of them toward you, laura.noel.
Eta: I can't believe you put up with all of their crap for two weeks. I am constantly amazed at people who can house family members for more than a night or two. The thought of guests at my house for more than an overnighter makes me twitchy, even when I adore the person/people. I read all of these kinds of posts and think, "Good grief! They're adults! Tell them to pony up the cash for a hotel!"
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