Baby Baptisms.... I feel pretty stupid!
SaraB1105
member
I have quite the dilemma. My husband is Catholic. However, he is by NO means a practicing Catholic. He has not once been to mass, confession, or any of that since we began dating three years ago. He fully believes in God, he just doesn't feel like he needs to go to church. That's fine. I was raised Baptist. I am not the best at going to church, but I feel we both have a great relationship with God. We PRAYED for this baby!
As many of you know, Catholics baptize their newborn babies. As a Baptist, I do not feel the same way. I was raised that once you accepted Jesus as your Savior, you could be baptized and you were on the path to Heaven. My husband and I have agreed that we are not going to raise our new baby to be Catholic (I mean, WHO is going to take it to church??) We will raise it in a home where God is present and take it to Sunday School and it will know everything it needs to know. If later on, he/she wants to convert to Catholicism, that's great in my book! Whatever it wants to do, the decision is theirs.
My problem is this, even though my husband and I have agreed on not raising it Catholic, he still feels the need to baptize it shortly after it's born. I am not familiar with infant baptisms. I mean, we definitely aren't going to baptize it in a Catholic church, that would be pointless since our agreement. Could someone enlighten me? I still fell that we should not baptize it right away and later in life he/she will accept Jesus as their savior.
Re: Baby Baptisms.... I feel pretty stupid!
I was raised Catholic, DH was raised mainly Baptist (I think? I really don't know).
Anyway, neither of us goes to church and we really have no desire to do so. However, it was important to me to have our babies baptized. DH agreed because I felt it was so important. I doubt we'll start going to church or send them to CCD so they likely won't make their first communion or be confirmed, but whatever.
If it's really THAT big of a deal to him maybe you can learn to live with it and let them get re-baptized when they're older and they choose to? I know lots of adults who've left the Catholic church and were baptized again as adults.
You don't have to Baptise the baby right away when Catholic. Some people wait until baby is 6m or even longer. We did DD at 6w only bc family was in town. With this next LO we will probably do 3-4m.
I'm not sure how Baptisms go in other religions. Maybe you could go to a few churches in your area and ask. Or just call them.
I wouldn't worry about it - I'm a Baptist, but if I was in your situation, I would just let it happen. They are different religions, but with the same root (God) and it certainly wouldn't hurt to baptize the baby - if it's important to your husband, it should happen. I wouldn't like my DH telling me our kids couldn't get baptized when they choose to do so later, so I can understand the opposite scenario. And God certainly won't frown on a double-baptism!
As for the actual ceremony - try YouTube. I'm sure there are plenty of videos that would give you an idea and make you more comfortable.
with respect to both religions, it's really not a big deal. Jesus is Jesus, right?
My family is "roman catholic" but no one goes to church, prays, or anything - they believe in God and being good etc etc (i'm trying to type this quickly)
My H is a christian but was not raised with any religion. He started going to a baptist church with his friend when he was younger and thats how he got into religion. He was baptized in an anglican church 2 yrs ago.
I was baptized at 3 months - my mom is catholic, dad is Prodstan (sp??) (i know nothing about what they believe in) -- but i was never raised in a church or with any kind of religion. Mom just told me there was a God and a bunch of "basic" stuff
when this baby is born, we will baptize it in the same anglican church H was. My H is more religious than I am, so he will take the reigns over this one.
i mean, it's just a baptism.. you put water on the babies head, say some words and carry on. it's just a ritual.
I was raised Catholic, and DH was not raised with any religion (his parents are Cambodian immigrants and their closest religion would have been Buddhist). I am not a practicing Catholic, but like you and your hubby, my hubby and I have a very close relationship with God, and we also prayed for this baby
. We just don't "fit" into one religion, but we both have a very strong faith. That being said, we have chosen to baptize our baby in the Catholic church we were married in because we would really like our baby to receive a blessing after she is born, which is what her baptism with represent.
Congratulations on your sweet little baby, also!
I'm not Catholic and I was baptized as a baby. I went to an Episcopalean (sp) church.
DH and I just had thsi conversation the other day because we don't go to church but we'd like to do it for the symbolism and as a way to have everybody come meet the baby.
My brother and his wife did what they called a "dedication," in their home, they had somebody pray over the baby and then we all had sloppy joes. haha. it was lovely and intimate and informal.
Baptism is to wash away original sin and to introduce them to the church and the teachings of God. It is more of a promise from the parents and godparents to raise the child by the teachings of God. Catholic and Baptists believe the same stuff for the most part. From what I read it seems like you are going to teach your child about God, morals and values which is pretty much what you are promising to do at the Baptism. Later in like around 7th grade or so we then make Confirmation where we confirm our dedication to the Catholic religion like other religions do with their Baptism. Just because you Baptize your infant does not mean that their religion is se in stone. It is still up to them if they decided to join the church or not. There are many other rites they must make before they are a member of the Catholic church (communion, confession, confirmation)
I don't agree with many of the Catholic teachings and didn't want to raise my kids Catholic, so we did some research and ended up having DD baptized in an Episcopalean church. We don't plan to bring her to church. She will have religious education as a kid and can decide her own path of faith as she gets older.
I would go forward with the baptism and think of it like the above pp suggested; as simply an introduction to faith and God's teachings. He/she can always choose to be re baptized as an adult when/if he/she accepts Jesus or whatever.
This is similar to what our church does. They call it child dedication as they also don't believe a child can make a decision on their stance with God but as parents we are dedicating our child and raising them to be God fearing/loving children.
depends on the church. my parents did not attend church but i was baptized in one of the biggest catholic churches in my city.
Baby girl #1 7/11/13
Baby girl #2 4/30/15
Baby Boy Due 2/16/19!
Not always true. A lot of churches will do anything for money. Hell, some might Baptise your dog for a couple hundred.
Totally joking here BTW. But with a donation, a lot of churches will do ceremonies for non-parishners.
There is n time frame for Catholic baptisms. DD was done right before her second birthday. We moved a lot and some parishes require 6 months of classes the church we had it done at had us watch a 30 min. Video on it and that was it.
DH thinks the same way, he was baptized, and grew up but has not been since he became an adult. MIL goes with me on Christmas. I go now and again when I feel up to getting up at 730 am. We aren't active Catholics.
Is his family active Catholics? I had a friend who was married to a baptist and he was catholic. His mother and him want his son baptized catholic, and the wife didn't know what she wanted. His mom made if difficult for her. If he wants it for tradition sake do it, doesn't mean your 100% committed to it raising the child that way.
Both DD's will be raised with the morals that Catholics bestow, such as believing in God and waiting till marriage, etc. but for the most part we want them to growing up with a choice to go or not.
I think it's a moot point, honestly. I don't think a Catholic church would even consider the two of you married if you didn't convert and you weren't married in the church. And if neither of you belong to a Catholic church, they probably won't let you baptize the baby in one.
Agreed. My church is more than willing to baptize and marry someone that is a non-practicing Catholic for a certain donation amount.
To the OP: If it is important to your husband, I would do it. It will not hurt the baby to be baptized now and then later if he or she decides to.
I would say that if there is any chance your child might grow up and want to become catholic, baptize as a baby. I am a protestant (a lovely amalgamation of every German fringe church out there, if I want to get specific) but my dad was a minister, so I learned a lot about different religions and sects of Christianity. For a lot of Catholics, a lot of the pressure to baptize Catholic is a hold-over from the days when unbaptized children went to Limbo for awhile - even though that was abolished with Vatican 2 (I think), there is still the residual that this is what should happen. Also, the Catholic Church is fairly picky about who counts as Catholic (though that's also eased up some). But if your child is baptized Catholic, it's a lot easier for him or her to do First Communion and become a full-fledged member of the Catholic Church later on.
As for your confusion regarding baptism, here's the simple answer, as already explained by many other posters. Basically, Baptism is just a ceremony that officially welcomes the child into "the body of Christ" (i.e. - the church) and asks certain questions of both the parents and the congregation, all centered around everyone in attendance helping to raise the child as a faithful child of God. In Protestant and Catholic churches, for the most part, the child then gets to decide as they get older whether they want to acknowledge that promise made by their parents when they were children - Protestant churches call it confirmation and Catholics first communion. A lot of churches will not allow someone to take communion unless they are first baptized, which is another consideration.
However, if you feel very strongly about adult baptism, then I agree with the other posters that a dedication service might be a good compromise. The United Church of Christ has a baby dedication certificate, so they might also do the service. You might want to call a local church and ask. Hope this helped.
Im baptist. The purpose of baptism is AFTER they accept christ they get baptized to symbolize the dieing to flesh and being forgiven by God. Baptism does not save you so there is no need for it before they accept christ because they wont remember it and they have no clue whats happening and why. Most kids dont understand until 4-5 years.
If he feels THAT strongly...fine. but make sure your child knows that the does NOT save them..they need to ask Jesus for forgiveness and into their hearts.
A true baptist church will not baptize an infant.
If you baptize your baby in the Catholic church you & your husband are agreeing that you will be responsible for bringing that child up in the Church.. which you won't be doing, and your Baptist church will probably side eye you for practicing infant baptism anyway.
I'm Catholic and in your case i would follow your Baptist tradition if that's the church you intend to bring your child up in.
Both my husband and I are practicing Catholics and I was a Catholic missionary for almost 10 years, so I feel like I?ve got a good foundation of info to share. FWIW, infant baptism is implied in the New Testament of the bible, specifically when entire households were baptized (Acts 16:15, Acts 16:33, 1 Cor. 1:16). Based on the way those books are written, any exceptions to who was baptized would have been noted, so everyone, including children, toddlers and infants, would have been baptized in those cases.
Baptism is the first of 3 sacraments of initiation as a Catholic Christian. The others are first communion and confirmation. The point of baptism is to remove original sin, not a personal statement of accepting Jesus. The Catholic church?s official teaching on baptism is as follows: ?In case of necessity, anyone, even a non-baptized person, with the required intention, can baptize, by pouring water over the person?s head or immersing them in water 3 times while using the trinitarian baptismal formula [my note: this means, ?I baptize you in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit?]. The intention required is to will to do what the Church does when she baptizes. The Church finds the reason for this possibility in the universal saving will of God and the necessity of baptism for salvation.? This is why the Catholic church doesn?t require people to be re-baptized when they?ve already been baptized as explained above. The Catholic church teaches that everyday of a Christian's life has to be an ongoing act of accepting Jesus, so there isn't a one-time thing you do for that as a Catholic.
For those wondering about the old ?Limbo? idea, here?s the Catholic church?s teaching on infants who die without being baptized: ?As regards children who have died without baptism, the Church can only entrust them to the mercy of God, as she does in her funeral rites for them. Indeed, the great mercy of God who desires that all men should be saved, and Jesus? tenderness toward children which caused him to say: "Let the children come to me, do not hinder them," allow us to hope that there is a way of salvation for children who have died without baptism. All the more urgent is the Church?s call not to prevent little children coming to Christ through the gift of holy baptism.?
Also, here?s what the Catholic church says about the salvation of people who don?t get baptized at all: ?Those who die for the faith, those who are catechumens, and all those who, without knowing of the Church but acting under the inspiration of grace, seek God sincerely and strive to fulfill his will, are saved even if they have not been baptized.?
All quotes are from the Catechism of the Catholic Church.
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