Need advice, esp from 2nd+ time moms..what do I need?

Manderlin923 · December 2012

I had DS med-free at a free-standing birth center, and we had complications post-birth (hemmorage, transfer to hospital & NICU for infant breathing fast) but overall (before that) it was an amazing experience and I received great care there and really loved my mws. It was just that I was one of the very rare people to have to transfer. I also went there for one of my pregnancies afterward but it ended in a missed m/c so I had to transfer care to an OB anyway. After that, I just stayed with my OB for all my other pregnancies (all losses)

I don't think we are going back there for many reasons. I'm not that concerned about the uterine atony situation happening again, but I do have to keep in mind that if it happened before, and I was unlucky enough to go through all that, so it is possible to happen again. The main reasons I am considering staying with my OB/hospital is that 1. I don't want to drive the hour+ to each apt, which will be a lot harder now getting childcare for my little one, plus I know 2nd time labors generally go faster and I'm afraid I just won't make it in time. And 2. I really do trust my OB. She is very open to my ideas, and before I got pg we had discussed fertility options and what would happen with twins- she was okay with doing a breech extraction of baby B, for example. Besides that, she's always respectful of my questions and I really do think she'll be supportive.

My question is, not so much where should I birth, because I'm definitely leaning toward staying with my OB, but what do you really think I need this time around? I cannot afford to do too much. My options are: hypnobabies home study course, or getting a doula (and my old MW might even agree to act as a douula for us) but of course I'm wondering, as a second time mom, whose already had a med-free birth (12 hours, back labor, 9 1/2 pound baby) do I really *need" either of these? There's still a part of me that's very wary of the hospital, even though I know they are supportive of intermittent monitoring, laboring in the shower, and pushing however I want. I'm still scared of ending up with a c-section and I'd rather not have one with caring for a very energetic child at home, plus the risks. Input? Advice? TIA!

(sorry so long!)

memo9 · December 2012

I'm not a second time mom, but if I was planning on having another baby in the hospital I would most definitely get a doula. I think it would have made a huge difference in my hospital birth.

SeaConquest · December 2012

I am a 2nd time mom who also had a hospital transfer from a birth center with my first (mine was for a malpositioned baby and failure to progress; I also had an epi and pitocin at the hospital). I did Hypnobabies with my first and, while I was completely relaxed during pregnancy and early labor, I didn't find hypnosis helpful for me during active labor. I will be going with a doula this time in hopes that I get a natural birth with #2. I am a big fan of laboring where you feel most comfortable, and if you feel good with your OB and in the hospital, then that sounds like the right choice for you. Good luck!

nosoup4u · December 2012

What does your DH think about having a doula? I had a VBAC with my second, so we wanted a doula for support in that. If we have a third, I don't know what I'd do. I think I'd see if it helped my DH to have another labor support person there (bc I tend to get nuts during labor!) or not.

I never got around to brushing up on med-free birth classes with my second pregnancy, but getting through contractions came back to me during my second labor. I really enjoyed my prenatal yoga class during my first pregnancy, I think you can get DVDs for it pretty cheaply. hth

aylafsu88 · December 2012

MegMo10:
I'm not a second time mom, but if I was planning on having another baby in the hospital I would most definitely get a doula. I think it would have made a huge difference in my hospital birth.

Totally agree. I had a doula with my first in the hospital. When DH and I have our second we will have a doula again. To us the doula was the best money we ever spent (we did take the Bradley classes and enjoyed them), but our doula took all the stress out of having a hospital birth. We hope to use the same doula the second time.

KLCNCC50 · December 2012

All the research I have done states a doula decreases your risk of having a C-section. I would want one but this is my first pregnancy and I have yet to go through delivery! Good luck to you.

bandwife · December 2012

I'm a STM who had a wonderful home birth with MWs the first time. Now we are having a hospital birth with MWs for our second (moved overseas and they won't allow me to have HB).

First, I would check out the hospital your OB delivers at and see if it is med-free friendly. Ask a few more questions from your OB on when she normally attends the birth - is she just called in for the pushing stage? If so you'll probably want to know more about the hospital protocol for monitoring and how involved the nurses are for laboring.

We did the hospital tour in our new home country and found that it was very med-free friendly. My DH was a rock last time so we're not bothering with a doula this time.

Our doula was AMAZING last time but the doulas on our little island are few and far between and, IMO, not as experienced as I would like (our doula for DS was a 20 yr career doula).

Like PP I would suggest a doula but I would also look into the hospital more.

tokenhoser · December 2012

I had a hospital birth with my family doctor last time and will likely do the same this time; DH has asked me to book the doula again. I thought about skipping it to save the money, but who knows how this birth will go down. DH was really happy to have her last time, and I think I was too (it's all rather hazy). So I vote doula, especially since hypnobabies takes time to practice and it's really hard to commit time with a toddler around.

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Need advice, esp from 2nd+ time moms..what do I need?

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