June 2012 Moms

I'm so exhausted I'm losing my mind!

I know there's a lot of posts on here about sleep training and different methods, but I feel like I've tried everything.  My DH and I are at wits end and so sleep deprived.  My lo is just shy of 6 months.  I'm SAHM to her and my 3.5 year old is in preschool.  Well she barely naps all day and wakes up 3x during the night.  She goes to bed around 7:30-8pm.  It takes about an hour to get her to sleep because she keeps waking up crying.  Then she eats at approx. 11, 2, 5 and then up at 7-7:30.  She takes a nap around 10am for 20 minutes and then again around 1-2pm for another 20 minutes.  Then she's so exhausted by 4 from refusing naps and can barely keep her eyes open till we finally do her 7pm feeding.  Then she's out like a light for about 10-20 minutes and the hour long process starts all over again.  I'm baffled how she can function on such little sleep and I'm baffled how I am too.  She's currently on Zantac for reflux at the appropriate dosage and eating 2 solid food meals a day along with her formula.  She barely finishes a 5oz bottle so I know she's not still hungry.  I just can't figure out what could be wrong.  Is it a food issue, discomfort issue?  I'm so lost and the peds just keep trying to get us to ween night feedings.  Well feedings are the only thing getting us ANY sleep.  Any advice would be so appreciated. 

Re: I'm so exhausted I'm losing my mind!

  • As hard as it might be for a couple of nights... Maybe have her cry it out for a few hours if necessary... Its brutal to hear but if you've truly done everything else... Have you tried rocking back to sleep our trapping on her chest without feeding her for a few minutes before resorting to feeding? We have to put a blanket over put shoulder and bounce ds to sleep at night. If he falls asleep feeding he is almost sure to wake up again
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  • DS has always STTN very well but his naps sound just like your LO. DHS grandma watches DS three days a week. Even though I told her repeatedly not to she let him take all his naps on her while she would read. At home when I would put him to sleep I would lay him down and if he didn't wake up right away he would wake up after 20 min. For three days I stayed home and we didn't go anywhere so that he didn't nap in the car. My goal was three one hour naps in a day. The first day was terrible. When he would wake up I would go in there and tell him it was nap time and pat his butt then leave and let him CIO for the remaining time of the hour. After an hour I would go in get him up and be very happy telling him that was a good try. By the third day he was sleeping the whole hour. I also noticed that sometimes he wakes himself up during naps when he rolls over, so for naps sometimes I put a pillow against his side.
  • imageDisneyPeanut:

    Have you tried changing her bedtime to earlier? I know it sounds counter-productive, but she might end up sleeping longer and still get up at the same time in the morning. We start DD's bedtime routine at 6pm and by 6:30pm she is usually sleeping. She'll wake up to feed twice, then be up for the day around 7:30am.

    Another thing to try is to shorten the time between her naps. Try having her take the first nap no more than 2 hours after being up (or at least start the nap routine after two hours), then repeat the same process for every nap. She might end up taking 3 naps a day.

    ALL of this. Sleep begets sleep, so if your child is overtired, they actually won't sleep. We had to really push our kiddos bedtime to about 5:45 she was so overtired. Then you can gradually move it later by 10-15 min intervals. Bedtime for a 6 month old should be between 6:30-7:30. A great book is "healthy sleep habits, happy child" worked wonders for us and give cio options, no cry options, and partial cry options

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  • I don't have any advice, but (((hugs)))!  My son is still up every 2 hours, sometimes every hour, and it up for the day at 5am.  Most days I am a zombie.    
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  • Have you tried Prevacid instead of Zantac?  Personally I don't like Zantac for reflux.  It works really well for the beginning of the time but wears off quickly.

    Is her crib mattress elevated?

    Your LO sounds exactly like my boys who suffer from severe reflux.  Also, for some reason reflux babies like to eat at night, I guess because they're too tired for fight it, but that's when they're laying flat the most and most uncomfortable.  If possible I would try to space her feedings out to 4 hours, believe me I know it's going to be really hard for a night or two.

    With Prevacid, Alimentum and an inclined mattress our DS2 went from waking 15-20 times a night to 1-3. He even slept through the night completely once.   He also usually takes one 3 hour nap and then a 20-45 min catnap in the evening.

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  • First I'd try wearing her in a good soft structured carrier (ergo, becco, etc not infantino or Bjorn).  I put dd on my back after she has been fed and she will fall asleep for both of her morning naps.  After lunch ds either has quiet time or can take a nap and I lay down w dd.  ds doesn't let me stay the whole time but dd will sleep for 2-3 hours total at that nap.  (Her two morning ones are much shorter).  I'd also try the same thing at night.  Feed her and put her in the carrier, front carry, and walk around your house.  After she has been asleep long enough to get in a deep sleep I'd put her in her crib. If that doesn't help I'd look into switching formulas.
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  • I hate to say this, but that actually sounds like a normal sleep schedule for a baby under a year old. Scientists consider it to be "sleeping through the night" when they sleep one solid five hour stretch per night. Some babies don't even do that for the first two years. All babies are unique and it is possible that you just have a very light sleeper on y our hands! Just try to remember that night waking has lots of health benefits! It allows your baby to make you aware of her needs so that she can thrive and grow. It also is theorized that light sleep during the first year helps the baby's brain develop properly! So try to keep a positive outlook on it and that might help you a lot :) 

    That being said, have you tried sharing sleep? Perhaps that will be the sleep arrangement that helps you all get some rest. My daughter always sleeps better when she is near me. It doesn't work for all babies, but your daughter might be one that needs that comfort! 
     
    If you aren't comfortable with that then you might want to experiment with different night time clothing choices just to make sure she is dressed comfortably. Then lie down with her on the couch or something and snuggle with her for awhile until she gets tired. Then once she falls asleep place her gently in her crib and pat her in a rhythm. (Keep in mind that it takes a baby 20 minutes to fall into deep sleep) Also, if you don't have one already, invest in a white noise machine. 
     
    If everything else seems to fail then you might have to make a few personal changes. Take shifts with your SO at night, find extra times for a nap, and do anything that will help you relax during the day! It is so important for the Mommy not to get too exhausted! 
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  • I'm very sorry to read your frustration and truly sympathize with you. Here are my suggestions, and I apologize in advance if I overlooked these ideas in other posts:
    Bath time w lavander soap
    Massage after bath
    Extra feeding or 2 during the day, particularly before bed
    Music, my LO loves nature music
    Bouncer w vibrations
    Cuddling, my LO is Bf and sleep best that way. Combo of our warmth, my heartbeat , skin to skin , etc.
    good luck!
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