Question to the working moms

malcivar · December 2012

What do you do for child care?

I'm fortunate right now in that my parents (retired) watch both boys but the downside to that is when DH and I want to have a night out or go out on the weekend. DH's parents live in another state so it's not like we have that option and it's really uncomfortable for me (and them) to ask my parents to watch them for longer on a weeknight or for some time on the weekend. I feel like that's their "down time". There's also the problem of having to stay home when one or both of them have doctor's appts.

So what do you all do for child care? Do you LOs go to a typical day care? Is there such a thing as a special needs day care? Special needs babysitting service?

Thanks!

finsup · December 2012

My ODS goes to the special needs preschool program in our town 5 days a week 9:30 - 1:45. After, the bus brings him to a "typical" after school program where he is until I pick him up at 4:30.

DixieNormous330 · December 2012

DD used to go to a typical daycare. She got PT and Speech Feeding there (the therapists went there, the DC didn't provide them). We had a bad situation though. DD was in the infant room because she was too delayed to move up to the toddlers room. When she was 19 months old, they told us that she had aged out of infants at 18 months. Our options were to get her a one-on-one aide and move her to toddlers or find a new DC provider. They couldn't have told us this at 16 months so we could figure out a solution? They graced us to 21 months.

Now DD is in a 5-day a week, 2.5 hour a day EI program at a local children's hospital. She's bussed to and from. When she gets home she has a babysitter in our house. It's working out fantastically.

zoeyandsummersmom · December 2012

We started out in typical daycare. DD really needs the one on one attention though. She barely eats during the day and they cannot meet her needs. We found a nanny via care.com and she starts transition next week. I think it will be easier in the long run to have the nanny, albeit much more expensive.

kcisthebombdotcom · December 2012

I dont work days anymore, but I used to work 20 hours a week. I found this home daycare ran by a former special ed teacher turned SAHM. It was perfect--she would work on speech stuff with my son and her child was my son's age and also had SN. I sent DS there 2 days a week, then my mom watched the kids 2 days. She eventually ended up going back to work and I stopped working days but I really miss her. My son really thrived there. We still get together for playdates on occasion.

Are you a member of any local facebook groups that are specific to kids with SN? That might be a good place to ask around locally. A nice compromise is maybe doing part time care through a daycare/part time care through your parents.

lite-bright · December 2012

I WAH about 20 hours a week, so my situation is a little different. We found a regular sitter/nanny through a local service called Mother's Helpers, who comes and watches the girls during that time.

She's fantastic and although she didn't have specific experience with kids on the spectrum, she did work for another family with a child with medical SN. My girls adore her and I really feel like we lucked out. She's in her early 20s, and couldn't find a job in her chosen field after college, so she's doing childcare instead.

I do drop-offs and she picks DD1 up from school, driving our car. I thought I'd have a very hard time with someone else driving my kids around, but when you find a trustworthy person it's easier than I thought. The other parents at preschool have asked if she's a relative and told me that she's very good with the girls, which is nice to hear -- I know she's just as good with them when I'm not around.

We've also had our Floortime therapist come and do a couple of sessions with her to help her know more about autism and about DD1's habits/quirks in particular.

The nice thing about the Mother's Helpers service is that although we have set hours, we can also call her or the service any time to ask for coverage if, say, we want a night out. We may even ask our sitter if she's willing to do a weekend day sometime so that we could go skiing -- which we'd be completely comfortable with, and wouldn't be an option otherwise b/c we have no family in the area.

Justinlove · December 2012

When LA went to a regular daycare up until this year when she started preschool. Now we have a part time nanny that picks her up and watches her until I get home. For evenings/weekends, we have her as well as another sitter (both college graduates--not teenagers) who are available. We have not done a weekend/overnight yet, but if we do, my parents would be happy to watch her. They just live a couple of hours away so we don't use them for date nights unless they start hinting about seeing their grandbaby

MirandaHobbes · December 2012

OP- there are SN daycares, and for occasional date nights, as PP mentioned, check out care.com. I've used them to find people who are a bit more responsible than your typical 12 year old. You can find occasional sitters who have specific backgrounds, i.e. people who have worked with specific special needs. For awhile DH and felt so trapped, never being able to do anything. Once we found a sitter we like (actually a former SN preschool teacher), our lives are much happier and DS loves when she comes over.

tarajayne · December 2012

We have a nanny we found through care.com (and also is a friend-of a friend). This was before A was diagnosed though. I am keeping her on though because she has been amazing with the kids. Starting next fall though I will have to find someone else though because we are moving.

amajane · December 2012

Another shout out for care.com. We have a full time nanny that cares both girls. She is young but has experience caring with special needs kids and wants to one day have a career as an OT or ABA therapist.

It's all about finding the right person which takes a little more effort when you have a kid with special needs. But they're out there.

JenGK · December 2012

We have a nanny who watches the boys when they are not in public school, and takes them to all therapy appointments. We pay her for 40 hours a week, even though she does not work that much. She is awesome, and I don't want her to take another job now that we only need her part-time.

mopdop2000 · December 2012

I work 32 hrs a week, so am mostly able to pick 7 yr old up from school. Iann, 4 yr old with SN, is picked up by a good friend from preschool and plays at her house until I am off work. When we realized that I needed to start working more, this friend was the first person I thought of to ask to babysit Iann. She is very routined and structured, whcih Iann needs, and he is doing great with her. Hubbys schedule is about to change however, so that will mess up the babyistting hours again! However now the Iann is happy at her house, we aren't worried about the changes this will mean for him.

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