Loss

xo1187 · December 2012

So, this is the first time i'm writing on in this area. I was so excited to find out I was expecting this past Jan. Then at 12 weeks I had surgery due to ectopic pregnancy.

I still hurt for my loss, but sometimes feel weird for posting on there boards. I read post of other women who lost their babies much further along, had a miscarrige, or gave birth to their babies.

I don't know why at times that my loss is any less than any one else's?

Sorry for the ramble.... Just still feel a bit comfused at times

fluttergirlmoonchild79 · December 2012

First I want to say that I'm sorry for your loss.

Your loss isn't any less than anyone else, but from the standpoint of the purpose of the board, it's simply different and the women here often need support for things that are different for those who didn't make it as far. Not saying that you're not hurting because of your loss however.

I will use myself as an example to attempt to give some clarity.

Quick back story - my son Corbin was 36 days old when he became an angel due to RSV.

I went into labor and gave birth to my son. I named my son. I held my son. I had baby showers and wore maternity clothes. Our home has a nursery all set up and ready to go like he's still here.

There are many women on this particular board who have all done the same things. We support each other when we remember their faces. When we don't know what to do with their things. When we feel phantom kicks. When our milk comes in and there's no baby to feed. I'm not saying early loss parents don't have needs, they're just different from ours.

I know several women who have had both early and late losses and even they have said that it's just different.

I'm in no way trying to be mean so I hope you haven't taken this post that way. I hope this helped explain it. Again, I'm not saying I hurt worse than you or my loss was greater, it's just different.

Again I am so sorry for your loss. Wishing you peace and love.

Loss

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