DH and I went for my u/s this morning hoping to see a heartbeat, but there was nothing, and there was no growth since last week. It doesn't even look like a there is a fetal pole in there anymore, it looks like there is something, but not what they are looking for, and definitely no heartbeat.
The doctor doing the monitoring said that we really should have seen a heartbeat last week, and certainly we should have seen one this morning.
I feel like this is some kind of cruel joke. First we think there are two, then we are told it's only one, and now there are none.
I am at work, but my boss told me to take the day, I just haven't figured out when to leave yet. I kind of want to get some kind of beta confirmation today before I go, but in reality, I know this is done. I was anxious all weekend about this ultra sound today, I guess I had a feeling about this.
Still processing this, I think I need to leave the office and have a good cry. Fortunately my husband is home from work this week so I can hang out with him.
Thank you so much for all of your support, I will still be lurking over here to see how you are all doing, and I hope that I get to join you over here again someday soon. I wish you all the best with your pregnancies and your little ones!
Re: Looks like this isn't our time after all-no heartbeat
Me 41 DH 46 Not actively ttc, surprise BFP on 1/6/11! 4/1/11 m/c our sunshine at 16wks after complications from CVS test. TTC #2 **5th cycle 12/6/11 BFP! Missed m/c at 9 weeks 1/21/12, trisomy 14. Two Chemical PG 3/12&7/12
** BFP 8/16/12 beta #1 148! beta#2 407 beta #3 4000 u/s 9.10 1 lovely hb 126, Baby Boy is due 04/28/13!!
Me:40 AMA, DH:36 0% morph, TTC#1;
BFP#1 4/2011, MMC 6/2011 11wks Trisomy 13;
BFP#2 11/2011, CP
FSH: 17.9, AMH: 2.2
IVF#1 w/ICSI: ER 4/3: 5R,4M,4F
ET 4/6 All 4 (1-8A+, 2-8A-, 1-3A) BFP#3
Two weeks of beta hell = Blighted Ovum
IVF#2 Aug/Sept: ER 8/27: 4R,3M,3F
ET 8/30 (1-8A+, 1-6A+)
Beta#1 9/10: 350; Beta#2 9/12: 796; Beta#3 9/20: 9155
Expecting Boy/Girl Twins! My babies were born 4/23/13 at 36w1d!
TTC #2 since July 2010
March 2012 IVF (MDL Protocol) Started stims 3/3; ER 3/11 (9R, 8M, 7F) ET 3/16 (5dt of 2 blasts graded 3AB and 3BA, 3 frosties(!!) Beta 3/26 = 386; Beta 3/28 = 827; u/s 4/11 says TWINS! Boy/Girl Twins delivered at 36 weeks 6 days
DD born 12.21.09, conceived w/ injects and IUI
TTC#2 since Nov 2011
BFP 2.6.12 m/c 6w5d | BFP 5.25.12 c/p
-Back to the RE-
3 medicated IUIs, all BFN
-Taking a break from treatment-
BFP 11.20.12 ~ EDD 7.28.13
My Chart
BFP #1 - missed m/c 4.18.11 found @8w3d, d&c @13w
BFP #2 blighted ovum found 8.2011 @8w, misoprostol
BFP#3 - missed m/c 6.11.12 @ 9w3d, d&c revealed extra chromosome 15
BFP#4 8.10.12, DD born 4/26/13
Over-40 parents...what we lack in vigor, we make up for with cunning.
TTC #1 since 8/1/10; Me:41 and BRCA1+, DH:46
DOR (FSH 24.3)/ terrible egg quality ; homozygous MTHFR c677t
5 IUI's: 2/11 to 6/11 and 1/12= BFN
OE IVF#1-4 8/11-6/12= all BFN
DE IVF#1 11/12 bad embryos= BFN
DE IVF #2 2/13 BFP/Beta hell: m/c 5w6d
CFNBC 7 months, not doing well; decided on guarantee program at RBA w/frozen DE
DE IVF #3 1/14 ET 4BB; BFP;M/C 5w1d, incomplete m/c; MVA extraction in ER 7w1d
DE FET#1 ET 3/1714; BFP, beta 1 3/27= 197, beta 2 3/31= 1586, beta 3 4/7= 13879!!
First u/s= Twins with HBs at 6w2d! We are Team Pink x 2!!
K & K born 11/21/14 at 38wks 4 days
SAIF/PAIF Welcome
http://waitingforraintostop.wordpress.com
TTC 10/11. IUI 2/12. BFP 3/8/12. 4/26/12 missed mc. RE consult 5/17/12. IVF #1 ER 7/13/12 53R, 41M ICSIed, 32F, 8 5d, 6 6d blasts - all PGD/frozen. PGD results 1 normal M and 1 normal F, 1 maybe M. FET 9/6, transferred 1 F embie. Beta 9/15 BFN. FET#2 planned for 11/2012 put off until 2013. Surprise BFP 11/21/12!! My son was born on 7/24/13!
Oh, this breaks my heart. I'm so deeply saddened to see this, you are in my thoughts and prayers.
Lots of hugs...
Me = 39 DH = 50 TTC (since 01/2009 after a short break, I stopped counting *cycles* in 2010)
DX 2010 : Unknown Infertility , AMA
HSG 2005 = Normal / HSG 2010 = Normal
SA 2005 = Normal / SA 2010 /2012 = Slightly low count : motility, morphology GREAT!
Chromosomal analysis, MTHFR, ANA's, Lupus, Protein C, Protein S, APCR = Normal 2011
M/C : 2005 (7wk), 2010 (6wk), 2011 (7wk)
8 IUI's 2010-2011 all BFN
IVF/ICSI antagonist 01/2012 #1 = BFN
IVF/ICSI antagonist long 06/2012 #2 = BFN
IVF/ICSI/CGH MDLF New Clinic/New RE 11/2012 #3 = One beautiful boy blasty frozen PGS normal
IVF/ICSI/CGH MDLF 02/2013 #4 = One more beautiful boy blasty frozen PGS normal
FET 6/20 : One 5AA PGS normal transferred Beta 1 6/28 = 53.9 / Beta 2 7/1 = 220 / Beta 3 7/3 = 550!
1 U/S 6w3d - Heartbeat 119 / 2 U/S - 7w5d- Heartbeat 169 / 3 U/S (OB) 8w5d - Heartbeat still great!
Baby G welcomed into the world 3/7/2014
SAIF / PAIF always welcome ****
My Blog




I'm so sorry. Wishing peace & hope for you.
1st BFP-8/17/12! Missed Miscarriage discovered @ 8 week US. D&C.
2nd BFP-2/13/13! Blighted Ovum discovered @ 8 week US. Natural miscarriage.
3rd BFP-5/22/13! By early June, progesterone plummeting. Another loss.
August 2013 - started Donor Egg process, but surprise BFP with my own eggs.
Dear Son born 5/28/14
ME:46 MH:44 DE IVF 2014
Met with RE 4/11. 2 IUI's BFN. DE best option. Switched clinics to do "shared" program. Had to retake all tests and a mamm that put me behind and then on a DE waiting list for 12 months. Picked a donor!! (10/13/13) Got matched. Estimated transfer in December. After 2.5 years of patiently waiting I will finally cycle....can hardly believe it. DE cycle got cancelled. One of her tests came back positive. Waiting for another donor. Donor picked!! (1/18/14)
DE IVF #1 (4/26) BFN DE FET #1 (6/4) BFP! Beta 1=339 Beta 2=852 Beta 3=9957 EDD 2/22/15!!
<br /> My Ovulation Chart</a>
Thank you all for so much support. I don't know what I would do without this board and all of you ladies.
My ultrasound yesterday was done at the place that just monitors me, my RE wants to see me today and do his own scan and see what it is they are looking at and confirm the results. For some reason they think the report is ambiguous and want to see for themselves, and do their own measurements. That makes sense to me, but I honestly don't think there is going to be another outcome, I think we will just be confirming what we already know.
I did leave work yesterday at 10:30, went home and then DH took me out for lunch at the Cheesecake Factory where I treated myself to a nice fat cheeseburger and then I bought 2 pairs of boots for myself. I was supposed to be Christmas shopping but oh well.
This still hasn't hit me yet, although I did cry last night while watching a very sweet video on Facebook of a dog and a little boy with down's syndrome playing with each other. I'm not sure if that was because of this, or that the video was the sweetest thing I have ever seen. I tend to cry at videos where animals are involved.
Me 38 MH 41 - TTC since June 2010 - dx with Severe MFI. Straight to IVF with ICSI. IVF #1 - ER 06/13/12 - 9 Eggs Retrieved - 4 ICSI'd - only 2 fert. 06/15/12 - 2DT - 3 cell & 6 cell with fragmentation. Beta 06/29/12 - IVF #1 = BFN. 07/20/12 - WTF Appt -Told by our RE to quit IVF. Second Opinion from RE is good. IVF#2 - November 2012. Estradiol Pills Started 11/6. Stims start 11/16. ER 11/26 - 7 eggs retrieved - all mature. 4 fertilized with ICSI. ET 11/29 Transferred 3 embryos. Beta is 12/10. 1st Beta 81 2nd Beta 160 and 3rd beta 360!!! First U/S 12/21/12 - We saw one beautiful gest. sac. 2nd U/S is 01/04/2013 - H/B 183 02/05/13 - NT Scan - everything looks good and IT'S A BOY! Aiden was born 08/20/2013.
IVF #2 is in progress. ER was 05/12/14 - 11 eggs retrieved, 8 fertilized with ICSI. ET was 05/15/14 - we transferred 3 embryos as we did on the cycle my son was conceived. We were able to freeze 3 embryos. Beta is scheduled for 05/26/14. 1st beta - 111. 2nd beta - 159 didn't double
3rd beta Friday 5/30) - not a lot of hope left. Beta # 3 is 247 - probably ectopic. Beta # 4 is 813 - possibly vanishing multiple sydrome? 06/05/14 - 5w4days - first U/S - we see a gestational sac and yolk - still have hope! 06/17/14 - 7w1day - U/S and saw and heard the heartbeat - Finally! 06/27/14 - 8w4days - Baby and heartbeat look and sound great
EDD 02/01/14 and It's a boy!
"Everything will be okay in the end. If it's not okay, it's not the end."