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Help! I'm starting over and my daughter is not happy

SHAWNIE206SHAWNIE206 member
in Washington Babies
I'm really nervous and excited about my pregnancy at the same time, see I waited almost 14 years to have another baby and my daughter doesnt seem to be happy. She doesn't even want to talk to me about it. I feel really bad but I'm super happy and i don't know what to do. Any ideas?
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Re: Help! I'm starting over and my daughter is not happy

  • ckmommyckmommy member
    I think the best thing you could do is try to include her, to an extent, with the pregnancy. Maybe ask for input regarding the nursery, name suggestions, etc. Also make sure to let her know she will not be replaced but also does not need to be disrespectful. As long as she is courteous talking about her feelings, let her. Being an only child for so long can make it a difficult transition, but you have time for it all to sink in. 
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  • GennieRGennieR

    hi,

    I totally understand how you feel.My son was 9 when I gave birth.He had mixed emotions at first. He asked me weather I would have enough love for both him and the new baby. I sat him down and talked to him about how mommy's love just doubles etc. I included his opinion in everything. We bought him a "big brother shirt", we told him he woukd be his brothers role model as he grows up so it is his responsibility to look after his brother and keep him out if trouble. My son took what we talked about my heart and now his little brother just adores him.

    I bet when your baby comes, your daughter's heart will just melt and fall in love with the baby.

    Good luck! 

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  • PinataMamaPinataMama
    Same here! Our 15 year old daughter feels as if she is being replaced. However, she was never meant to be an only child in the first place and has for YEARS asked/begged for a sibling. Now that it's a reality it doesn't seem so nifty to her after all.  I don't have any good suggestions for you (sorry!) just commiserating with you.  We've tried to include her in some of the decisions that need to be made, and the shower, etc. Hopefully it helps!
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  • bonjourchicbonjourchic
    I agree to keep her as involved as possible! Asking her for advice and including her in decisions will help her feel more in control of the situation, rather than the baby being an invasion that's flipping everything upside down
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