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BM moving....vent

Sunday924Sunday924 member
in Blended Families

Unless it is military related I will never understand parents that move away. BM is moving 3 hours away and has SS, a DD, and two SK's here. She won't give us any details. She told me her H had a job interview so she didn't know what time they would be back to get SS Friday. I asked her if she was moving and she said it's a possibility. I asked her if she was taking SS for break and she doesn't know because they will be at the new place. I also asked how she planned on doing visits and she said she couldn't do EOW because of gas and where they will be living will be to small but she didn't tell me what she would be doing. The not enough room is the same excuse she used for summer. Anyway I just feel really bad for SS because his birthday is Friday and I really don't think she is coming. The fact that she won't give me a straight answer about things is the most annoying thing ever!

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Re: BM moving....vent

  • twister22twister22 member

    That's so frustrating. BM needs to step up for SS's sake. I cannot remember your back story, but I'm guessing you guys are the CPs with full custody.

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  • Sunday924Sunday924 member
    I just feel like they should stay. We would never in a million years leave other SS behind. I have no idea when he will see her next. She has gone months before but she was more up front about it then. SS has enough problems already and I'm sure this is going to make things worse.
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  • Sunday924Sunday924 member
    imagetwister22:

    That's so frustrating. BM needs to step up for SS's sake. I cannot remember your back story, but I'm guessing you guys are the CPs with full custody.

     

    Yes BM left SS when he was a baby for three years. She came back but has been in and out since. DH finally went and got a CO when SS was 10....he is 13 this week. When she is in a relationship she is an ok mom. She has been with her H for a little over a year so I didn't expect her to fall off again.

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  • Littlejen22Littlejen22 member
    That sucks. How old is SS? Our BM moved across the country when SD was 13 and literally has seen her for. 4 trips in the last 10 years, OMG, did not realize it has been that long. She has not seen her since SD was 18 and we paid thousands to sent SD there to live because she was having major issues here and BM have her a oneway plane ticket back to out state with no where to live. Some people just suck and justify it in their heads. Good luck, my only advice is to make sure he has someone besides you guys to talk to.
    Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
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  • SigirSigir member
    That really stinks for him. Maybe it won't happen. I agree, can you talk w a school counselor in te event that bm moves, so he or she can check in on ss?
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  • KTdiditKTdidit member

    I don't get it either. DS's dad moved and hour and a half away, from a place with tons of jobs and commerce to a place literally in the middle of nowhere with no job opportunities.

    The situation sucks for your SS for sure, it must be hard to have a parent that is so unreliable like that. If I were you I'd wait to figure out any visitation details or schedules until the BM knows what they are doing, if they are moving, etc. All you can do is see what you are working with when the time comes, ya know? As for your SS's birthday Friday could you maybe do something big at home to take his mind off waiting for BM? I don't know how old he is though, and older child wouldn't be that easy to distract.

    And FWIW it's my opinion that the person moving away cannot use "we can't afford gas" as an excuse. It was their choice to move away, knowing how far it was and knowing how much gas costs.

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  • SusanH.SusanH. member
    I never understood it when one parent moves FAR away from their child either.
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