It's so strange how different my perceptions are this time around.. things that bothered me so much last time I have absolutely no opinion on this time around.. I post occasionally on PgAL, and it's so different reading posts.. so many posts I related to during my pg with DS, but now, it's bizarre how different my opinion is now.. I wouldn't think all that much would change in 5 months!
Loss #1: 18w5d.. D&E 04Mar03
BFP #2: Jun2011.. missed miscarriage. D&C 08Jul2011 8w4d.
BFP #3: Nov2011.. Our Rainbow Baby!!! DS Born: 15Jul2012!
BFP #4: Nov2012.. 2U1 - DS2 born 12Jul2013. BFP #5: 01Jan2014..3U3!!
My blog about raising 2U2!
Re: Meh.
It's not about the loss part that I'm "different" about.. as, that's still very much a factor in my mind.. it's about everything else that seems so insignificant now.. not to single out any specific posts, but to use this one as an example.. with DS, I was SO adamant on who was going to be there for DS's birth, and I remember getting into a fight with DH about how I didn't want a bunch of people waiting in the waiting room, etc.. I was SO ticked when we were admitted to L&D and he said his parents were on there way.. it was exactly what I didn't want..
Except.. in the end, I could care less.. who was there in the waiting room mattered absolutely zilch to me. It had no effect whatsoever on my experience. And, now 5 months after the fact, (seeing posts on similar topics) it really made me realize how silly I was for being so stern with DH over it and for getting mad initially. It's just funny.. I was so gungho about it being for DH and ME only and that it was a "milestone" we were reaching together, etc, etc, etc.. and yet, looking back, it didn't matter who was in the waiting room.. DH and I still experienced that milestone together.. we still had all the "special time" we wanted.. now, that seems like such a trivial thing to have worried about.. but, when I was in the moment, I was so heated!! LOL.
There are lots of other examples, too.. and, I do have more appreciation for the snark.. it's just so different this time.. it's like, after having DS in my arms, I realize the absolute only thing that matters is the end game. How we get there, who's there in the waiting room, what color the nursery is, etc.. it's all so miniscule in comparison to the reality of holding that baby in my arms..
I just didn't expect to feel so drastically different in so many ways, LOL. I guess this is for the better -- maybe I won't have as many "rules" this time around!! LOL
You are so awesome