have you told your child about what happened

beachgirl1977 · December 2012

I have a son in K and have not. We haven't had the news on while he is around or talked about it. I debated telling him in case he heard about it at school but chose not to. He goes to afternoon K so I figured he won't really be around the older kids.

I did give a few vague comments like I love him, it's my job to keep him safe, listen to your teachers during fire drills, etc. I also told him that if he ever has questions about anything he can come to me.

I didn't see the point in sitting him down to tell him, but I don't want him to find out from someone on the bus either. What did you do?

ppants · December 2012

My twins are in 1st grade. Their TV access is limited to kids shows/DVR so they haven't heard about it. I'm not going to bring it up unless they do.

MissNikki007 · December 2012

I did the same as you. I don't want her to find out from anyone else either, though.

It's tough, because I KNOW my kid and she will freak the freak out. UGH, we shouldn't even have to worry about this.

shadypines · December 2012

13 yr old is well aware. Our 4 1/2 yr old no. His TV access is very limited to Nick Jr & Disney Jr. Not sure if I will mention it to him just yet.

[Deleted User] · December 2012

I don't have older kids, so we didn't tell P. I can only imagine how hard it is for you guys to have to try to explain this to your kids though.

I'd like to say that if I thought she could understand it, I'd talk to her about it. I, too, wouldn't want her to find out from others first but I have no idea how I could deal with it. HUGE hugs to everyone today.

Libby1978 · December 2012

The twins know, but don't seem freaked out. I think they probably have the same mindset as most teens and think stuff like that could never happen to them. Honestly, I'd rather that they feel that way about it than be freaked out. We can't live life in a bubble and we shouldn't live life in fear.

ETA: If I had a pre-school/elementary aged child I would not bring it up unless they asked questions.

Cbidt's girl · December 2012

I haven't told my children K and preschool aged. I'm really hoping my K kid doesn't hear anything on the bus or from a classmate with an older sib. He's anxious anyway and children should not have their innocence taken away this early. The school policy is not to discuss it unless asked by a child.

blowfish11 · December 2012

DD is in K. I haven't told her. She is so sensitive and I know she would freak out and not want to go to school.

I did, however, explain to her that she can talk to me about anything she has questions about. And we went over the whole "listen to your teacher no matter what, at all times", too.

CoffeeBeen · December 2012

DS is too little, he's only 2. I can't imagine explaining this to a child.

evaazalea · December 2012

I have not said anything to DS even though he has seen me crying a few times this weekend. DH does not want him to know either, he is quite sensitive and we don't want him to be afraid of going to school, he is home sick today so I do not know if the school will say/do anything.

Dougsgirl4ever · December 2012

No we did not tell DD she is 6. The t.v. was off or on movies all weekend. Thankfully our school is out for Christmas break for 3 weeks. Hopefully she will not be hearing it from someone else.

JET29 · December 2012

My son is much too young to understand what happened. But, I am a School Psychologist and think that this is a great resource for talking to children about violence. It might be helpful if your child hears something at school, and comes home asking questions.

Talking to Children About Violence

MJHershey · December 2012

DS is my only and he is two, but when it comes time we will talk to him. Hopefully there will be no other newer incidents to discuss and we can say how much better things got after that.

I know my 7 year old nephews are having a rough time, my sister and BIL only told them as little as they could. One of them is nervous around big groups right now.

ougrad1 · December 2012

Emerson (almost 5) has asked why the flags are "only half way up" every.time.we.pass a flag.

I told her that the country is sad. When she asked why I told her that some children went to Heaven and country is very saddened by it and that the flag is their was of showing their sadness.

She hasn't asked beyond that. I didn't want to lie and was caught off guard and that's the first thing that I could think of.

ppants · December 2012

JET29:

My son is much too young to understand what happened. But, I am a School Psychologist and think that this is a great resource for talking to children about violence. It might be helpful if your child hears something at school, and comes home asking questions.

Talking to Children About Violence

Thank you. This is helpful. I read it and printed in case my children do ask.

lildevil968 · December 2012

Yes. She had actually heard about it at school, her teacher was very upset. We didn't go into great lengths about it though because we didn't want to scare her. We did however make sure she knew what to do, and where to go in a lockdown situation.

jlw2505 · December 2012

My girls are in PreK and K at the elementary that is PreK to 6. Just got an email from one of the PreK teachers with information that all the teachers received on how to talk to your kids and in the email she did mention that while most of the kids did not know about it some of the kids did and had asked questions. I will answer questions if my kids bring it up but I don't plan on bringing it up with them. They don't need to know and I trust the teachers to redirect in a great way and talk to the kids with questions one on one and in a calm manner and all of that.

Starr57 · December 2012

I talked to DS about it. He's in full day K and I wanted to be the one to tell him and answer any questions before he heard about it at school. I basically told him that a bad man went to a school and hurt people. Then we talked about what to do in an emergency, the precautions his teachers and principal are taking, stranger danger, etc. He didn't ask very many questions and we didn't talk about it for more than 20 minutes or so.

MommyKayla11 · December 2012

DS wouldn't understand it, so no.

Whenigrowup · December 2012

I teach 4th grade. Not one of my 42 (I have two classes) mentioned it today, which really surprised me. I hope it's because they don't know. I'm sure at least some heard about it but decided not to bring it up. We were directed not to bring it up and talk one on one with any student who did mention it and want to talk about it.

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