Birthing Classes w/o Hubby? — The Bump
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Birthing Classes w/o Hubby?

Anyone do birthing classes w/o Hubby? We're (cautiously) expecting him to be home for the birth, but gone from weeks 21 through 30-something. And I want to learn as much as possible, with or without him. 

Any experience with this?  

Re: Birthing Classes w/o Hubby?

  • When I asked my midwife about it she thought I'd not like being there without hubs. She said I'd be the only one without some kind of partner and it would make me feel badly so she recommended reading some books and watching a few natural birth/hypnobirth videos and call it a day.
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  • My DH was gone week 22-32. I ended up going to birthing class with a friend and it was fine. It sucked not to have him there, but I needed the class and I took notes and shared everything with him when we got back. And actually going with my friend was hilarious, we were like Amy Poehler and Tina Fey in Baby Mama! Haha.

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  • In our class one woman's husband frequently couldn't make it because of work.  She seemed totally fine without him there.  Another girl was a single mom and she came with a friend each week.

    The class was small and really informal so it would not have been "weird" at all in my opinion.  Plus our instructor was a Marine wife and would have totally been able to relate.

    I mean, let's be honest here, having your husband/partner hold an ice cube in your hand is not really going to help either of you during the actual birth regardless of who is present when.  I think you might find that the support of having other people to talk to in the class and possibly outside of the class will be worth it.  Our group shared emails at the end and we got in touch with each other after the babies were born and have stayed in touch for over 2 years now. 

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  • My husband was deployed so I went to the birthing classes with my mother.  I would definitely go.  I found it very informational for a first time Mom who didn't know what to expect!  I would have been fine going alone, but if you don't feel comfortable with that bringing a friend was a good suggestion.
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  • Thanks ladies! I'm going to go ahead and sign up when we get there. (Moving to our new duty station in 2.5 weeks, eek!) I've got a couple of military spouse friends there already, and I think they'd be willing to help me out if I felt uncomfortable alone. But I'm comfortable doing most things alone by now, so I'm hoping this won't be any different!
  • I think it depends on the type of class you're taking and your personality.  If you are doing a Bradley method class, that focuses on partner coached childbirth so you would need the person at the classes who will be your birth coach. 

    And I disagree with the comment about what help a husband would be (something about an ice cube?) while you are in labor.  If you are choosing to have a medicated birth, that may be true but if you are going med-free then a birth partner can be very beneficial to some people.  Someone to remind them of breathing techniques, labor positions or positive imagery can be the cornerstone of a positive birth experience. But it's not necessary for everyone.  I labored completely alone for my second child and preferred it that way but many women need someone there for support and encouragement. 

    So, I really do think it depends on the class and your birth preferences.  I wouldn't forgo the class if it was impossible to have my birth partner present though. 

  • My husband will be gone so he won't be at the birth, that's why it's pointless for me. I did find a doula through Operation Special Delivery. If you are completely on your own, I highly recommend. So far she's been amazing.
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  • I would do it. I moved home during this deployment so I had my mom at appointments and my friend came with me to lamaze. Once I was there it really didn't matter, I still received the same info that I would have had with my husband there.
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