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Feel bad for SS's :(

sweetdreamz6700sweetdreamz6700 member
in Blended Families
I guess BM, her FI and his 2 kids decorated their Christmas tree w/ out SS's. They go over to BM's after school on Mon/Tues so they can spend time w/ the kids there. I guess all this took place after they came back over to our house for the evening. I know we don't have a say what goes on over there but I'm sad for them. They were obviously hurt by it and its one of thier favorite things to do at Christmas. Poor guys :(

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Re: Feel bad for SS's :(

  • FutureMrsWittigFutureMrsWittig member

    That sucks, but try to help them not focus on  it.  Maybe they can make oranments and add them to the tree next time they're there?

     

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  • cole2144cole2144 member

    Poor SS`s, that`s sad. We would never do our tree without SD which is why we are decorating our tree this weekend when she comes back. Those things are really important to kids and it is very important to us that SD is a part of our family traditions.

     

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  • kali55kali55 member
    That's so crappy.  We wait for SDs for all decorations.  Having all the kids around makes it more special IMO


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  • Mama2TwoBoysMama2TwoBoys

    That's so sad. Why would she exclude them from something like that? Decorating the tree is always such a big part of family tradition in our house, and growing up.

    Ever since SS was a major part of my life, we've scheduled as much as possible for when he's home. CO says BM has him 1st, 2nd, and 4th weekends for four days, we get the rest of the time. I try super hard to make sure things planned to include him. Luckily BM passes on quite a bit of her time, and that makes it easier.

    I agree that maybe they can make some ornaments to add when they are next over there, and that they should mention to their mom how they feel about it.

    Did you decorate your tree yet? If you haven't, can you do some extra things to make it even more exciting?  

     

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  • SchrodingerSchrodinger member
    Our BM did the same thing.  She's really OCD about certain things and decorating her Christmas tree is one of her issues.  SD's were talking to her on the phone and we heard her say "the tree is all done, I can't wait for you to see it!"  DH and I felt bad for them, but hopefully decorating the tree at our house makes up for it.  We have 50/50, so its not like there was a limited window to decorate it.
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  • Littlejen22Littlejen22 member
    imageSchrodinger:
    Our BM did the same thing.nbsp; She's really OCD about certain things and decorating her Christmas tree is one of her issues.nbsp; SD's were talking to her on the phone and we heard her say "the tree is all done, I can't wait for you to see it!"nbsp; DH and I felt bad for them, but hopefully decorating the tree at our house makes up for it.nbsp; We have 50/50, so its not like there was a limited window to decorate it.


    But someone who did it because they are OCD and do not want the kids to help is so different than it being a tradition and leaving them out but doing it with her boyfriend's kids.

    Personally I would tell her in a non accusatory tone that the kids seemed upset about it, maybe she is clueless and did not think they would care.
    Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
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  • sweetdreamz6700sweetdreamz6700 member

    We did our tree last week as a family. We went down and picked it out, all of us took turns cutting it down and we decorated that night. They each have their own ornaments starting w/ their first christmas and those are the first ones on the tree ;-)

    We did encourage them to let thier mom know that they were hurt/confused etc. but I don't know if they truley will. My understanding is that when they found out they wouldn't be there they asked why but I'm not sure what answer they were given.

     And I'll definitely suggest adding something they made to thier moms tree. They will love that idea! :)

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