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So if both my kids have delays...
I can't help but feel that its something we're doing as parents.
My DS (3.5) had a severe speech delay, was in ST for over a yr, still pronounces many words wrong, probable ADHD, and still won't potty train. At that time I thought it was random, he's a boy, boys are slower, its just him...
Now my DD (13 mo) is looking like she may have some delays as well...she is not talking yet (not a single word) and not walking either. I know there is still time but pedi is giving us 2 more months and then referring to ST again.
I'm feeling a little down, like its something we're doing. Before I had kids I knew I wanted to keep them home (vs full time daycare) and now that they both stay home (and we cannot afford FT preschool), I feel like we put them at a disadvantage.
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Re: So if both my kids have delays...
I'm sorry you're feeling discouraged.
FWIW, neither of my boys said a single word until a week before their 15m well visit (when I was starting to worry!) and they were both advanced in expressive language by 18m and have stayed that way (with all the delays one of my son has, that is his strength even though he started a little later than average!). And with walking, my son with delays started walking at almost 16m but his twin started full-on walking the day he hit 14m and he's now advanced in gross motor skills. So try not to worry yet. I'm sure if my son with SN had been born first I would have worried about the other (Will) not walking or talking at 13m, but by 18m Will was doing great and has been on track or ahead with everything since then. I worried briefly at his 3yr visit since there were some fine motor and adaptive milestones he was "behind" on but I talked to Alex's OT and she had him join the session that day and after assessing, she said he was fully capable; he just wasn't motivated, and I think since we were putting extra effort into helping Alex catch up in so many areas, we'd "let Will slide," in a sense, with some things he should have been doing.
Sorry that got long but I hope it helped!
I can't really chime in much because both of our children do/did have delays. DD2 will be 2 in Feb and she has no spontaneous speech. She is starting to SOMETIMES repeat something you say but only with the words she already knows, 'mama, dadda, baby" she doesn't ask for milk/food/bottle/call for me when she's upset.
However, I did want to offer this piece of advice. If the average age for something is 18 months, that means that on average 50% of kids are doing it before that and 50% after that. So being on the far end of 'normal' doesn't mean abnormal, or necessarily atypical. And it certainly doesn't mean you did anything 'wrong'
if your oldest went through ST then chances are you actively incorporate those tools into DD's life as well. Just say everything, talk about everything you are doing, etc.
DD2 is just starting to become interested in trying to talk, and she did not walk until 15 1/2 months.
Good luck & hugs.
Have you checked through your family history to see if any other family members have issues with speech delays/developmental delays? My grandmother had 6 kids all who were late talkers. One of my female cousins didn't walk or talk until after 2. I didn't talk until three, potty trained at 4.5 and was in speech therapy until 9. both of my kids are delayed as well. Most of this is out of your control so don't beat yourself up. If you're doing the right things in utilizing EI services and working with them at home, you're doing all the right things as a parent. Sometimes these things happen unfortunately.
In terms of your DD 13 months is very early to be worried. A good majority of kids aren't walking at 13 months--the norm for walking is 10-15 months. Unless your kiddo hits 18 months and has no signs of walking yet (like cruising) you really shouldn't worry. My DD wasn't walking at 13 months and started around 14.5 months. She's fine (in regards to motor milestones anyway).
Hi-
Just wanted to say that my son was a late talker (15 months) and my 13 month old still doesn't say anything (not even mama).
Hang in there!
Both of my kids have delays but they are very different delays. Yes, they are both in speech and PT but for different reasons. My oldest is ADHD, ODD, and speech & learning delays (possible apraxia too). He has always been hard to understand, was a late talker, weak core, etc. He loves math but wants very little to do with reading.
My youngest seems to be "normal" but is hard to understand in a different way (seems to be more muscle related and just need to re-train his mouth). He loves to read and is fascinated with math. He didn't sit up until 10 months and didn't walk until 16 months yet his core is normal - he was just a bit later to do those things. He started PT because he was running weird but we finally discovered it was due to severely flat feet and orthotics are helping to improve that.
Sorry for the novel. My point is that each child is different and although it stinks to have multiple children with delays, know that it most likely isn't you and that it very well could be that their delays are different from each other. While we see DS1 being in therapy for years, we see DS2 as only needing it for a short time.
Eli 6.18.09 35.5w
Silas 1.25.13 35.4w 10 days NICU, allergies/asthma, gluten intolerant
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