Shower for 5th kid?!?

JamiesWife2010 · December 2012

Really, do people really have baby showers for their 5th baby? My neighbors have 4 children & were expecting their 5th in late November. The youngest is 3 or 4.

One of the sons just dropped off a shower invite for this Saturday. I don't even want a shower for my future LO#2, so it just seems weird to me. Is this the norm?

mama&baby · December 2012

Honestly, I think it kinda depends on your social circle. I am completely in agreement with you though! I think the only thing I MAY agree to if someone offered was having JUST family come to a small get together (not called a shower or sprinkle). No registry or anything...

It never ceases to amaze me how crazy people are about baby stuff... what else could you possibly need? If you were stupid enough to throw away baby stuff then that's your issue. I would send a card and say congrats... with no gift whatsoever

lkm2006 · December 2012

My mom had a shower for her 5th (and last).

There were 13 years between the youngest and the new baby and her Sunday School class (my dad was the teacher) threw it for her.

Showers for 2+ babies are definitely not the norm around here and usuallly frowned upon but I think the class wanted to do something special for them.

ETA: my mom had no baby registry or anything of the sort.

JamiesWife2010 · December 2012

Mama- I know families probably want to celebrate a new baby(the 1st or 5th) but I couldn't believe the registries. If my family wanted to do a small get-together for my next kid, that would be fine. There will be no registry or gifts asked for, though.

lkm- I could understand a shower if there is a huge age gap, like that. I think the neighbors' youngest daughter is 3(MAYBE 4 years old).

I think I have some baby blankets that we never opened for DS & some new baby gift bags in DS's closet. My gift may be ready. Embarrassed

tonychelle · December 2012

I wouldn't feel comfortable having one and dont necessarily agree, but some people around my area do seem to do that. My friend had one for her third (second boy, 10 years between, and 5 years between the girl). I went, obviously, but I didn't buy her as much as I did for her first. Some families and groups just like to throw showers for any baby; mine doesn't, but many do, especially if it's like the first girl or boy.

RedCamaro · December 2012

Wow! I would definitely not have more than 2. The only reason I say that is because some people have a lot of space between kids. But the 5th, no way. If I'm not done having kids, I'm keeping all of the baby gear.

JamiesWife2010 · December 2012

I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks a shower for #5 is not necessary. I felt bad for immediately thinking that way.

LittleMommaBlueHen · December 2012

My friends have a tradition of sprinkles for any baby after the first. It is less than 10 of us and it is more just to spend time together celebrating the baby. We do gifts but they tend to be smaller unless the mom is in need of some big ticket item and then we pool together to get it. I think full blown baby showers for subsequent children are kind of nuts though.

ewilliams1127 · December 2012

This is one of my biggest pet peeves. I think it is horrendously tacky to have a second baby shower. I think there are some exceptions (like a lot of years between, adoption, etc.) but personally if you "oops" get pregnant after you have already sold or gotten rid of your previous kid's stuff, then you should fork it out yourself. People already spent money for your first kid with the expectation it would be for subsequent children.

I do a small gift for the hospital (outfit, bib and flowers for mommy) but I do not do gifts or attend second + showers.

lkm2006 · December 2012

JamiesWife2010:
I'm glad I'm not the only one who thinks a shower for #5 is not necessary. I felt bad for immediately thinking that way.

Definitely not the only one! Like I said, I know they are socially acceptable in some areas, but it's not the norm here. I side eye someone if I get invited to a second shower! I couldn't imagine getting invited to someone's 5th with young kids!

I know my mom's case was different and most people probably didn't have a problem with it. (Just for the record.. she didn't have showers with #2, 3 and 4)

authorofdreamz · December 2012

Unless they are throwing it for themselves I have no problem with it. I mean are you supposed to tell someone 'NO' if they want to through you a shower for a subsequent baby? That would be really rude IMO. I also however don't feel that people only have baby showers because they don't want to buy stuff for their baby. They are just fun.

Nwlywed07 · December 2012

We had a mom in our MOMS group that just had baby number 6 and we did a small shower for her. It seemed a little much but you do always need things like diapers, creams, soaps, etc. All the stuff that gets used on a lot. Obviously they don't need things like clothes and large items. I would certainly side eye a registry though.

StefB28 · December 2012

authorofdreamz:
Unless they are throwing it for themselves I have no problem with it. I mean are you supposed to tell someone 'NO' if they want to through you a shower for a subsequent baby?

This, exactly. I didn't have a shower for my second, but would have gladly attended one if someone had offered. (We didn't need anything-- 2 boys, 13.5 months apart.)

We threw a shower for my cousin who was having her 5th & 6th kid. She had 7 year old quads & found out she was having twins-- she didn't have any baby things left in her house, so we threw her a shower. It was fun & no one resented having to attend a second shower, especially since she missed her own shower the first time around, after being admitted to the hospital for pre-term labor the day before.

flipflops01 · December 2012

authorofdreamz:
Unless they are throwing it for themselves I have no problem with it. I mean are you supposed to tell someone 'NO' if they want to through you a shower for a subsequent baby? That would be really rude IMO. I also however don't feel that people only have baby showers because they don't want to buy stuff for their baby. They are just fun.

Agree:) 5th shower is a bit insane.. But I think usually other people want to throw you one and it would hurt their feelings to not let them throw you a shower (it's the same trickiness with engagement parties that you sometimes get from families, etc). I think they are good intentioned and a time to celebrate and catch up with your girlfriends. We all can see from a mile away, those who may be wanting to share their exciting news, and those who may just want some freebies- if it was the latter than I would probably be less inclined to attend.

flipflops01 · December 2012

And I forgot to add, this is not the norm! If it was a random neighbor that I was not close to, and their 5th, I would definitely NOT go to shower and buy them a present.. that is pretty tacky. If it's a good friend/neighbor that you hang out with regularly, then I'd suck it up and get a small gift and call it a day (and hope they stop procreating). LOL

Want a personalized experience?

Shower for 5th kid?!?

Re: Shower for 5th kid?!?

Choose Another Board

Search Boards