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I was not ready for this

ToastieSimonsToastieSimons member
in Attachment Parenting

DS2 has been sleeping with us basically since he was born.  Every now and then we'd try the rock n play and he hated it.  He has been sleeping AWFUL (up 15-20 times a night), and we FF so it's not a matter of nursing all night.  

DH and I decided to try the crib to see if we could get a stretch at night so we could get the house tidied, eat dinner, etc together.   

 We also modify Ferber's progressive waiting and do a "fuss it out" method instead of CIO.  We allowed him to fuss (fussing to me is whining) but if he got to the point of crying we went in.  He went to sleep without a peep!!! And he only got up twice that night.  

The next day he fussed on and off for 7 minutes and fell asleep for an hour nap.   Since then he's been taking good nap and last night he woke up ONCE!!!

I am not ready for my baby to leave me like this!  I really thought he would bedshare with us for a while.  Sears doesn't mention this part of AP, when the parent is more attached to the child and the child is ready to sleep alone. 

To my boys:  I will love you for you Not for what you have done or what you will become I will love you for you I will give you the love The love that you never knew
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Re: I was not ready for this

  • Emerald27Emerald27 member
    Yay for good sleep! I'd wear your DS some during the day and snuggle as often as you can throughout the day as well. Bedtime isn't the only opportunity you have for closeness and snuggles, so try to make awake time extra special!

    That said, I am still bed sharing with DS and have far more separation anxiety than he does! We are definitely mutually attached...and I know I'll be sad when he is ready to sleep independently.
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  • lisa5201lisa5201 member

    Haha, I hear you. DD bedshares, and I am really not looking forward to her one day leaving us! 

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  • kcisthebombdotcomkcisthebombdotcom member

    My daughter was the exact same way! She never took to bedsharing (besides a period from 8ish-12 months old/some snuggle time in the morning for extra zzz's) like my oldest who still sleeps with us did. I had lots of difficulties getting her to sleep until I went with my instincts and let her fuss alone for a few minutes to fall asleep. When I'd try to rock her/comfort her it only upset her more and made it more challenging for her to fall/stay asleep.

    The silver lining to this is I didn't have to go through the struggles I did with my son to get him to sleep--it's still when it's time to go to bed she goes in her crib, I walk out and she falls asleep in less than 5 minutes.

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  • outnumberedoutnumbered member
    I understand.  We switched my youngest to a bed this summer and he finally started sleeping soundly without interruption.  In his crib he woke up a couple of times a night.   Before he was in a bed he needed to be rocked to sleep.  It was not a burden because he fell asleep within 10 minutes.  I loved the quiet time with him.  Now he is in his bed and falls asleep on his own.  He does not miss the rocking, but I do even though I am getting more sleep.
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  • JessieJHJessieJH member
    I hear you- though we still bedshare part of the night. DD sleeps well in her nursery for the first few hours of the night (it's a great stretch of solid sleep for her). It's not until around 11-12 that she comes to bed with us. Until she does I mostly just lay in bed and read or wait for her to cry so that I can go and get her.
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