C-sections
Spending nights alone in the hospital?
in C-sections
For both of my previous c sections I had someone stay with me in the hospital. DH stayed with me first, but he is such a deep sleeper that he wasn't much help. My mom stayed with my the second time so that DH could be with DS1. She was great, but I think I would rather she take her vacation days to be with us once we are at home.
Did anyone spend their time in the hospital alone at night? I know the nurses can help me, but it is nice to have someone right there so I don't have to call a nurse just to get DC from the bassinet. I like to room-in with my babies, but I'm not totally against sending them to the nursery.
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Re: Spending nights alone in the hospital?
My cousin just did this last month because her DH only took a week of vacation and they would rather he be home with them instead of at the hospital where you already have help.
My only 'fear' is that I will have to fight to keep DD in my room with me. I don't want her being sent to the nursery, because I want to keep her close and learn her cues ASAP and I don't feel you can do that as well if baby is in the nursery. Plus the one night we sent DS to the nursery so we could 'sleep' was a joke and they were bringing him in to us every 5 minutes. We would have been better of keeping him with us.
If you don't mind baby going to the nursery, I say it's up to you. I would just check before you deliver on your hospitals policy. The policy at my hospital is that an adult has to be with you the first 24 hours if you have a c/s. If there isn't someone in the room with you, they take the baby to the nursery. It's because they said mom isn't able to get in and out of bed the first 24 hours like she should.
Which is understandable. I can't. I still need hubby to help me in and out of bed to pee and him lifting baby in and out of the bassinet along with helping change the diapers that first day is just so much easier. We have arrangements for our other 2 children for the remainder 3 days, but if they start to not to want to stay, then hubbs will go home after the first 24 hours and stay with the kids at night and come back during the day.
I was in the hospital 9 days after DS was born (he had pneumonia). DH stayed a few nights, but then went home. He also didn't stay all day with me because we were moving and he had to get stuff done.
I was able to maneuver the bassinett next to my bed, then raise my bed up enough to where I didn't have to get up to get DS out. It took some effort, but it worked for when I was alone.
The nurses were good at coming, too. My hospital didn't have a nursery, so DS had to stay in my room.
We only have one and I can't imagine DH not being there the first time. I had an unplanned c section and had a hard time getting to and from the bathroom from the bed so it was nice to not have to buzz the nurse. Also our hospital doesn't have a nursery so the babies are in your room so I needed him there for extra support.
Now that we have a toddler, I probably won't mind him spending part of the time at home. I will have a repeat c section and would like him there the first night so we will probably have his mom home with our daughter.
GSx1 - 05/13/2013
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I had to with DD3. It didn't go well for me - depression hit in the hospital when I was alone. I think alot of it stimmed from being in so much pain too. Everyone kept telling me 2nd+ CS go easier but mine was worse - much worse. I had a terrible hospital stay and I really want someone staying with me next time.
Thank you for asking this question. It has been on my mind a lot lately since we have a 2 year old and my mom hasn't made any specific comments about staying with us. Until her visit is cleared up I'll just assume that my H will have to go home each night with our son.
The first time around H stayed every night and helped with the baby. The one night we sent him to the nursery so we could get some sleep was a joke. The nurses kept coming in all night to do different checks on me that we should have just had the baby with us.
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This is exactly what we did. DH went home at night to take care of the dog & get a good nights rest (vs. sleeping on the not comfortable couch & snoring, keeping me awake). He would come back first thing in the AM. DS stayed in the nursery at night & the nurses brought him to me when he needed to be fed. I wouldn't have done it any other way. Like PP said, what would have DH done differently?
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I thought I'd send DH home at night for my 2nd c-section, but I didn't. He would go home every day around about noon and come back at 9pm.
ds#2 didn't sleep in the hospital and I needed that extra help.
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This is my first c-section, but I'm tentatively planning on having DH stay with me for 2 nights. Maybe just one if things are fine, but here's my NON-c-section experience on why I want him to plan to stay more this time.
DH didn't stay much with our first baby and that worked out okay. Our nurses were great and maybe b/c of birth timing I got more rest before visitors started coming. But with our second baby, DH didn't stay, and I ended up feeling really exhausted and overwhelmed. The nurses were super busy and we had a mean one, and I'd been up late several nights pre-delivery and then up almost all night with the delivery itself and was exhausted. DS was a hard infant right from the start (SWEETEST little guy now!) and was fussy, spitting up/nursing constantly. I wanted DS to room in, but the second night I was so worn out I asked them to take him to the nursery, and got a snotty reaction from the nurse (who also resisted coming in to help me change his first big poopy diaper after his circumcision). She said they were really busy and could only take him for a couple hours. I was SOO tired and sore and I could have just cried. They also kept forgetting to check me and give me meds, and if I had been more drugged or out of it to start with (i.e. like I may be after c-section?) I wouldn't have been able to be my own advocate about getting the right care.
I felt really alone and overwhelmed and I don't want the same thing to happen again.