If you had an adoption shower

bumpuser794640 · November 2012

when was it in relation to your journey? People are already asking me if we're going to be having a shower, and I'm sure at least one person will offer to host one for me, but I don't know what the best time would be.

I'm feeling very at peace with our IF journey at this point and am starting to accumulate a few little baby things on my own, so I was thinking of having a shower as soon as we're home study approved/on the wait list. Does that seem appropriate?

raecheleblue1 · November 2012

We waited until after DD was placed with us. Actually planning them now for Jan.

So excited for you getting so close. I remember when you first started posting, I think it was around the same time I did...way earlier this year. Yay!!!

bumpuser794640 · November 2012

raecheleblue1:
So excited for you getting so close. I remember when you first started posting, I think it was around the same time I did...way earlier this year. Yay!!!

I'm so excited, too! Congrats on your baby - just precious.

kgs0505 · November 2012

Ours were after M came home. I didn't want one before because I felt uncertain. It's good we did it that way because the first match fell through, and M was last minute anyway. We had purchased while we were going thru the homestudy the crib, mattress, dresser, carseat, and stroller. And I had a "go pack" of stuff, like 3 bottles, a couple blankets, and some newborn and 0-3 month gender neutral clothes. Everything else i figured we could buy wherever we ended up. It really was plenty of stuff. newborns in a hotel room don't need much.

lafayettegirl · November 2012

We have had several offers from people to host a shower, but I am glad that we waited. We thought we would have been matched by now and, sadly, we have not. I've accumulated some items here and there, but what I have really focused on is creating a wish list at Amazon.com. That list is marked private and is an assortment of everything I may want or need. When we do finally get a match, I will have the registry list all ready to go because I've been working on it.

Everyone is different in terms of what makes them comfortable, but the adoption journey is also different for everyone. It is already a little hard to walk past the nursery (which is not totally complete) and see the small collection of items we have. I dread to think how I would feel if a shower had already occurred and we had a nursery full of stuff that has yet to be used.

Like I said, everyone is different. I like going to my private Amazon.com baby registry and adding items and doing research on them.

Good luck!

lafayettegirl · November 2012

Oh - here is what we do have so far:

Crib, mattress, changing table/dresser, car seat, stroller frame, and a "go bag" that contains a couple of diapers, wipes, 3 dressing gowns, 3 swaddle blankets, 2-3 burp clothes, and a couple of starter bottles.

If you want a list of what was suggested to go into our "go bag", PM me and I'll send it to you.

dholsapp · November 2012

We had a shower a month before BM was due...but I was very confident that she was going to place and not change her mind. At first I was against any type of shower before like most other people due to fear, but once I was comfortable with BM I went ahead and gave in!

Julie721 · November 2012

dholsapp:
We had a shower a month before BM was due...but I was very confident that she was going to place and not change her mind. At first I was against any type of shower before like most other people due to fear, but once I was comfortable with BM I went ahead and gave in!

This almost exactly, and it was with only intimate friends. We had a bigger "meet the baby" bbq a few weeks after bringing him home.

jillianmb · November 2012

We had one after we met our son but before our court approval. It was a bit "risky" because of the chance we would not be approved to adopt him, but I wanted to enjoy the season of anticipation like an expectant mom would so to me it was worth the risk.

crene84 · November 2012

We had a "meet the baby" shower just recently, when DD was 8 weeks old. We focused on toddler gifts (clothing, learning toys, etc). It was a lot of fun, having DD there!

Having said that, we did consider a pre-baby shower, but everything happened so quickly for us. If you can handle it emotionally, I say go for it!

silliestbunny · November 2012

In my opinion, you have two choices...

1- Either wait and have a meet and greet w/a new baby which can be special and wonderful

or

2- Schedule one early before you are matched.

I'd shy away from doing one for a specific baby you are matched with because of all the risks... and having lived through failed matches, it would have been tough to have presents specifically for a baby if it didn't work out. KWIM?

lizlemon2 · November 2012

We are having our shower tomorrow. We waited until someone asked us, and were homestudy approved and matched.

Dr.Loretta · November 2012

It's really up to you.

Someone at my work wanted to throw me one when we were matched. Unfortunately (for her) we were matched with a baby already born, so no shower until after she came home. MIL threw one for us when DD was 7 weeks old. It was a blast.

If you're OK with doing one pre-TPR, go for it.

steph196 · November 2012

We waited to have a shower until after Sydney was home. They ended up being when she was about 3-4 weeks old. I didn't feel comfortable having a shower before her BM signed.

sarahtoledo · December 2012

We are hoping to have a big, celebratory shower after we're home study approved and before matching. Like Jillian, we would like to enjoy the expecting part. We've tried for so long and had so many disappointments... I really want the happy expectation.

orangecupcake · December 2012

I had one with friends/family after DD was home, about 3 weeks old. I had one at work when DD was about 1.5 months, just before returning to work.

summergirl79 · December 2012

We had 2 showers after we came home with DS- also wanted to wait since it was such an unknown time period, but started our registry early- everyone is different though so if it feels right to you, then go for it!

maryoosa · December 2012

As a superstitious italian-American girl we won't be having a show until the baby is born, placed, and the tpr is signed...so probably will do it about two months after baby is born.

If you had an adoption shower

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