Hello, let me introduce myself first..
For the first 30 years of my life, everything was smooth and worry-free. I was my parents’ most beloved child, found my true love in college, and happily married him after graduation.
At work, I was my boss’s most valued employee. Whenever I was in charge of a project, colleagues would inevitably say, “Oh, then I’m totally at ease.” I was constantly named “Employee of the Year,” with generous bonuses every year.
Later, I started my own business. Within just three months, I had broken into the market and started making money. By the fifth month, I was earning twice my previous salary. Growth was steady month after month. Right when the business needed more hands, I serendipitously met an amazing partner, and the company reached a whole new level.
Really, it seemed like at every step, whatever I needed, a pair of hands would always place it right in front of me, just in time.
My Two Girls: Ellie & Mia
Meet Ellie, My Firstborn
In 2020, my husband and I decided to have a child. After trying for over a year, we finally got the news in 2021 that a little one was on the way. In 2022, we welcomed our first child, Ellie. She made me a mother.
She is utterly adorable—big eyes, rosy skin, chubby little hands. Every time I look at her, I can’t help but give her a kiss. She is pure joy, and I love her more each day.
But as a first-time mom, I faced unprecedented difficulties. The postpartum tearing wouldn’t heal, and the pain was excruciating. Clogged milk ducts made my breasts hard as rocks. The severe sleep deprivation… And what was even more crushing was that, with zero parenting experience, I was clueless when faced with her unexplained wailing, night terrors, refusal to nurse, constipation, diarrhea, fevers… I desperately searched online, longing for one accurate, truly useful answer!
It was during this time that I thought, once I make it through this “dark” path, I must leave a light on for other new moms.
And Then Came Mia
Ellie had just turned one when I got pregnant again. In 2024, we welcomed our second daughter, Mia.
Completely different from Ellie, Mia is a great eater and sleeper. Although she had her fussy moments in the first two months, starting almost from month three, she became super easygoing. She feeds on schedule, gradually sleeps through the night, loves her solid foods, and adapted quickly when I had to stop breastfeeding due to mastitis.
This made me realize just how vastly different babies can be! It made me even more determined to write about my experiences.
Why I Had to Start This Blog
The Catalyst: A Life Pivoted
After Mia was born, my business also began to decline sharply. I had no choice but to close it and become a full-time mom. My work no longer involves Excel and Word, but instead revolves around changing diapers, washing bottles, making baby food, and managing household chores…
This has been a monumental challenge for me. All my past achievements seem irrelevant now. Managing two young children has brought me a sense of frustration I’ve never known before.
The Daily Reality
They are always fighting over things. When one is in my arms, the other immediately demands to be held too. When I try to cook, Ellie wants me to read her a book. When I attempt to load the washing machine, Mia has a diaper blowout, and I must drop everything to change her…
By the time I finish all that, I see the cup of hot coffee on the table has gone cold again. And it’s not until evening that I remember, “Oh my goodness, the clothes are still in the hamper, unwashed!”
Of course, being a mom is filled with happiness, but that doesn’t negate how hard it is.
My Promise to You
Because I’ve walked this path myself, I won’t just tell you how joyful motherhood is, like many websites do. I want to share my real, unfiltered experiences so every new mom can find a “companion” here.
I want to tell you: you are not alone. What you’re going through, I’ve been there too. Your breakdowns, your helplessness, your moments of losing control—I’ve had them all. You don’t need to feel guilty. This is just a small, necessary stretch of the journey for every mom.
My Hope for This Space
I really want to share my parenting experiences—not just the warm, glowing moments, but to honestly document the pitfalls I’ve stumbled into, the tears I’ve shed, and the “survival wisdom” I’ve scraped together in utter exhaustion.
The Goal: A Mom’s Toolkit
I hope this blog becomes a “mom’s toolkit,” filled not with vague theories, but with:
- Practical Tips: Like how to quickly figure out why a baby is crying, tried-and-true methods for dealing with clogged ducts, or how to efficiently manage the daily grind with twins (or two under two) solo.
- Pitfall Avoidance Guides: Sharing the baby products I regret buying the most, and those “game-changer” parenting hacks. Letting you know which parenting anxieties you can let go of, and which principles are worth holding onto.
- A Community for Moms: I hope my stories connect me with more moms like you. We can cheer each other on in the comments, share our own tricks, turning the storms we face alone into a journey we walk together.
The Bigger Vision
My previous career taught me to analyze data, solve problems, and optimize processes. Now, I’m applying all those skills to this new “position” of Mom. I want to prove that a mom’s value is absolutely not confined to the home. The mindset, resilience, and creativity we built in our careers can shine just as brightly—perhaps even brighter—in this more complex, long-term “project” of raising humans, and can even be transformed into a force that helps others.
My hope is simple: that every mom who opens this blog can let out a sigh of relief and say, “So it’s not just me.” Then, she can find a bit of practical info, a dose of comforting solidarity, and return to her sweet, chaotic mom-life with a little more confidence and a little less weight on her shoulders.
This road? Let’s walk it together.
ashleyr409
member
Re: Breastfeeding after C-Section
IVF #1: 9/11: ER: 12R, 11M, 10F, No Frosties; 5dt: 2 blasts, 1 morula; DD born 6/3/12
IVF #2: 11/12-12/12: ER: 20R, 20M, 16F, 4 Frosties; 5dt: 3 blasts, DS born 8/9/13
However, people have different pain thresholds. I was only on ibuprofen once I was in my hospital room and at home. Others get lortabs or percosets. It just depends on the person but make sure you let the nurses know you want to BF and ask to see an LC after delivery. One came to my recovery room to help us BF.
This. I just had one on thursday. I am on Percocet and breastfeed.
That is ridiculous! Of course, you can take pain medicine and breastfeed. I took Percocet and Motrin without any problems.
This kind of ignorance from health care professionals makes me so angry!!!!
BFP 12/19/08- DS born 8/25/09 9lbs2oz via Zavanelli Maneuver
BFP 8/26/11- Missed miscarriage discovered 10/19/11 at 11w2d, measured at 9 weeks gestation w/ no HB. D&C 10/21/11
BFP 3/17/12 at 12dpo CP 3/21/12
BFP 4/23/12 at 10dpo Stick my little one! Beta #1: 83.3 @ 13dpo Beta #2: 197.7 @ 15dpo
Our little man is getting bigger every day!
My BFP Chart
DS2 - Oct 2010 (my VBAC baby!)
this for me, too. Andplusalso I had morphine with my epi.
THis was me as well, and even 4 weeks after my son was born and I had to have another emergency surgery to remove my galbladder and I nursed right through that as well! Of course I only needed Motrin for that as after the C I think I was immune to any other pain! lol
You will be fine, just make your wishes known and dont let them give your baby a bottle if its not what you want! My husband fought off the nurses for 2 hours until I could get out of surgery and nurse! Thats another story but still.... It will be great for you!
Started TTC in 2006, LOTS of trying, and trying, and 7 rounds of IVF with 13 embryos, 2 perfect little boys and 5 loses....
All finished with babies, started to make diet changes, Keto, to be MORE for my kids, lost 30 pounds, still going, and 3 months in, I had a natural cycle, and then ovulated... Hubs and I are going to see what happens now... Maybe a natural pregnancy? After everything we have been through? Or just a return to normal hormones? We shall see what the future holds!
Baby Dust To All!!!