Adoption

Surrogacy

DH and I think we're going to look into surrogacy. We just want to know, that there's no way the surrogate could keep the baby? Even if we used a donor egg, there isn't a way she could just decide to take the baby, correct?
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Re: Surrogacy

  • I think if y'all are really concerned about it, you should go with an agency. I know some states (such as TX) are more "surrogate friendly," where there's almost no way the surrogate could keep the baby with a donor egg. But every state has different laws.
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  • I second what everyone else has said. I also know a few couples that have used a surrogate successfully.
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  • We started with parenthood road with surrogacy. In the state I'm in, Massachusetts, surrogacy is an iron clad road that does not allow the surrogate any rights to the child. We had a surrogate and were going to proceed with an egg donor. The laws also do not give any rights to the egg donor or surrogate involved. Once a surrogate is found, a law abiding contract is created to protect all involved, at least that is the process in MA. We did not continue because insurance would not cover anything for us based on my previous health. 

    Good luck...thinking of you!

  • Surrogacy comes in many shapes and forms, so I would look into it and see which kind looks like it will work for you. And talk to lawyers or agencies who handle them, so you can get an idea of the legalities behind it. I would imagine that, just like with adoption, an ethical agency/lawyer is going to make it pretty problem-free from a custody perspective.

    GL

  • I have a friend who has gone through this. Agree with PPs that talking with a lawyer is your safest option to understand the laws for your state. GL and keep us posted.
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    Moved on to  gestational surrogacy with a family friend who is our angel and due 7/23/15


  • Ditto what previous posters have stated.

    In my state, a surrogate, even without biological connection, still has legal ties to the child if they would like to parent- they can.  It's called like gestational guardianship or something of that nature.

  • Just wanted to add that my heart aches for you on your journey.   So many ups and downs.  (hugs).

    agree with PP

    rules vary by state. my state is NOT "surrogate friendly" so we decided not to go that route.

    this website is an online community with lots of information.  legal stuff in second link :

    https://surromomsonline.com/

    https://www.selectsurrogate.com/surrogacy-laws-by-state.html

    TTC #1 for over 5 years - too many to count IF treatments (tried everything and anything), repeat miscarriages. Finally, Sticky Success!! B/G Twins arrived 2011. VOTE on my Name List Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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