Hello! After lurking on this board for a few years I have finally decided to introduce myself. I'm Gwyn I am married with two beautiful bio kids. Addalyn who is almost 4 and Lilah who will be 18 months on the 16th. I am am wahm, and own a children's company. We also are youth leaders at our church, and spend a lot of time with teenagers!
We always knew that at some point we would adopt. I had thought that it would be when my bio kids are older. However, recently my husband and I have decided to start pursing a foster to adopt situation. I have my heart set on fostering to adopt an older boy (age 9-14 probably.) DH is still some what on the fence, he is unsure about adopting out side of our birth order.
Right now we are in the researching faze. We plan to buy a house this spring, and after that we will begin the process.
(Warning this next section is more of a vent/unloading. We haven't told anyone that we plan to adopt so I just need to tell someone about this.)
A few weeks ago while researching foster to adopt, I stumbled across a website that had pictures of kids waiting to be adopted. I clicked on my state and the second kid down is a little boy who attends our church. In fact, his foster mom is DH's bff's(lol) mom. I had actually just bought a Christmas wreath from him. This past Sunday during breakfast at church he walked in. We were sitting right near the pastry table and I was able to start talking with him. My 3 year old invited him to sit with us. He chatted with the girls and it was just so pleasant. I sat there with tears welling up thinking about how he could easily "fit" with our family. How the situation is almost too perfect.
I have no idea what the future holds for our family, if this little boy will join us or not. So I guess I am tentatively introducing myself as a "hope to adopt" mom.
Re: Long intro.
TTC September 2010 thru October 2011
SA February 2011: Normal
RE App. October 2011 - Recc. Clomid and IUI
Taking a break from TTC to pursue adoption
Met our 2 year old son in Russia July 2012!
Court trip October 2012
Home November 24 2012!
Back to RE Summer 2013. TTC journey continues:
Dx DOR, endometriosis, low sperm count
Clomid + IUI#1, #2 = BFN / IUI #3 = ???
Laparoscopy scheduled December 2013
That is exactly what I have been thinking.
DD2 | June 2011
DS1 | Oct 2013
ADD3 | Oct 2014 (April 2001)
DS2 | June 2016
DS3 | Dec 2018
Due with baby blob August 2021
Welcome! I do look forward to hearing more of your story.
Have you begun the process of becoming licensed yet?
Welcome to the board!
Aaccck, your kids are soooooo adorable!
Not yet. We need to focus on buying a house right now. After, we will start the process. Although, we may try start the classes after the Holidays.
DD2 | June 2011
DS1 | Oct 2013
ADD3 | Oct 2014 (April 2001)
DS2 | June 2016
DS3 | Dec 2018
Due with baby blob August 2021
Welcome to the board!! Your kids are crazy cute : ) I'm also a "hope to adopt" mom lol, I really like that phrase! My suggestion is just to read everything you can get your hands on, here are some books I liked about foster care/adoption:
1. Another Place at the Table - Kathy Harrison
2. One Small Boat - Kathy Harrison
3. Three Little Words - Ashley Rhodes-Courter
These are all books written about the individual's experiences, Kathy Harrison is a foster and adoptive parent, I could not put either of her books down. Ashley Rhodes-Courter is a former foster child that was adopted, I believe as a pre-teen, and it is also a riveting read.
Thank you ladies! I feel very welcome (The bump had changed so much in 4 years...)
I forgot to mention that one of the reason I have always wanted to adopt/foster, is because my mother was severely abused as a child and then placed in foster care. I think of how different her life would have been if she went to a loving family. However she was in two homes before she found her forever family. By then she was already a jr in high school.
The "funny" thing is, I think my mom will be the hardest one to win over when we tell our families.
DD2 | June 2011
DS1 | Oct 2013
ADD3 | Oct 2014 (April 2001)
DS2 | June 2016
DS3 | Dec 2018
Due with baby blob August 2021
It's quite possible you are correct. I found that the hardest people to "win over" are those that had negative experiences with foster/adoption in their pasts. Just stay positive, and tell her your reasons for doing this. Eventually, she will see that your motives are pure and that you will be able to love all children in your home equally.
My father worked as an assistant director of juvenile detention centers. He was the first on board when we chose to adopt, and is convinced that we will have none of the problems we fear with the criminal justice system, despite the fact that we suspect M has FASD. He's all "love can fix everything" which is unreal, because when my mother wanted to foster, he was the one who said absolutely not. He'd seen too much of the bad, but time has given him perspective I never imagined.
Good luck to you!
I just caught your post and that's so exciting you're thinking about adopting! I know it's hard to know when's the right time to begin this process, but I think you're on the right track by just praying about this decision. I know God can open or close doors if He wants you to pursue this or change direction. And, I just wanted to say that I'll be praying for you too! Keep us posted on how things go, OK? Blessings!