STM: Co-sleeping to Toddler Bed
caymarks
member
Right now we live in a 2 bedroom trailer with our spare bedroom set up for 7 year old SS. It is a very small room and can not fit DS's toddler bed along with the other bed and dresser. DS has a toddler bed in our room, but Co-sleeps for the most part. Honestly I love it, but I am thinking that I should start transitioning to his own bed sooner than later with a baby coming.
Does anyone have any suggestions on transitioning to toddler bed especially when it has to be in the same room?
We have moved him after he falls asleep and that works as long as he doesn't wake up in the night and come to bed with us. I'm really not sure how to get him to fall asleep in his own bed because he has never...not even as a baby had good luck at falling asleep on his own. He wasn't a baby that fell asleep on the floor while playing or anything like that.
When we have tried putting him in his own bed he just gets down and comes in the other room to find us. I keep putting him back but eventually he just gets hysterical and screams and cries. Any suggestions?
Re: STM: Co-sleeping to Toddler Bed
Does he sleep in the toddler bed for naps?
I would say definitely start now and take it slow. Reward him for staying in his "big boy" bed all night or even for a few hours and make a big deal of it. Try to underplay the time in your bed--don't make it "fun" or play. Extra cuddles in the toddler bed, but not the big bed, etc. Your DS is still so little that rationalizing with him just won't work. All he sees is you changing up his routine and pushing him away from you.
Ugh! That makes me feel terrible. Maybe its not the best time to start doing this then. I just started working full time this week so I'm gone until 4pm. He is already struggling with me being gone. If to him it feels like I'm pushing him away by making him sleep in his own bed then maybe I should hold off. That might be too much at once. I never want him to feel that way.
Like I said. I LOVE co-sleeping, but I just know it won't work with a new baby and him. LO will be in a crib or pnp from the beginning, but with BFing all night I just don't think it will work. Plus DH has made a few comments lately about not being able to cuddle anymore and I completely agree.
Edited: Since DH works evenings and I work days he goes to my mom's from about 1:30-4 (during our shift overlap) and takes a nap there. She rocks him and then lays him on a spare bed.
If it's enjoyable to all, I would let him. I'm big on letting them do things when they are ready, instead of forcing them. It's a process.
I'm sorry, I didn't mean to make you feel bad. And I'm speaking from child development experience, not parenting experience which is totally different (as I'll learn in May since I'm a FTM).
I do think the best course of action is to introduce it now, focus on the positive behavior and minimize the negative behavior. Give it about 2 months and see how things are going and then check in with the pediatrician for further guidance. Just take things slowly for now and don't pressure too much.
We are not planning on co-sleeping at all because I don't want to deal with that kind of transition. We will use a pack and play in our room until 3-6 months and then a crib in the next room over (or the pack and play if we still haven't gotten a crib). DH and I are also both "messy" sleepers and half the time the blankets wind up on the other person or on the floor and I tend to sleep pretty deeply so I would be too scared to have the baby in the bed with me. It's totally a personal choice and you do what works best.
I'm a FTM and haven't dealt with this personally, but have done a lot of research because I plan to co-sleep, and from what I've read, if you are able to have the older child in-between you and DH and the baby on the other side next to you only then it is possible to safely co-sleep with multiple children of different ages.
It does sound like he is dealing with a lot of transition right now anyways, and there will be even more major transition come May when the baby is born. Just to keep in mind.
Good luck!