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I need to snap out of my sadness.

Lauren79Lauren79 member
in Secondary IF

Last night I was looking at DD and realizing she is growing up so fast.  I was looking at her little feet and noticed how big they are getting.  I was reminiscing of when she was so tiny.  I don't know if it's the holidays coming up or the fact that my friend had a baby yesterday or that I am reading a book and one of the characters is pregnant (I didn't know this when I started the book).  I just can't snap out of it this week. 

I want to be pregnant, I want DD to have a sibling.  I have been so positive this whole year and now I feel like it is never going to happen.  Just feeling sorry for myself.  I kept always saying, "I will be pregnant by Christmas"

Now I am in the 2WW on my cancelled cycle.  I hate waiting. 

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Pregnant with Letrazole (Femara) on the first cycle with DD after TTC 2+ years
TTC#2 with Letrazole (Femara) since January 2012
BFP 06.29.12 EDD 03.11.13 natural m/c 07.13.12
BFP 09.22.12 EDD 05.31.13 natural m/c 10.07.12
CP 11.09.12
BFP 01.01.13 EDD 09.15.13 d&c 01.24.13

BFP 03.26.13 EDD 12.04.13
 

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Re: I need to snap out of my sadness.

  • 74dragonfly74dragonfly member
    This was me yesterday. I feel like you. Today I'm focusing on Christmas shopping. Seems to help. I wish I had better advice. Just know others are with you.




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  • kofmkgkofmkg member
    Right there with you! It's so hard to look at the year behind you and remembering how you believed that every cycle of the year was going to be your lucky cycle.  And now, we're looking at a fresh year ahead and I'm still wondering when that lucky cycle is going to come around.

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  • ChiTown BridgetChiTown Bridget member
    I'm right there with you. It's been worse since my son just turned 2. It makes me so emotional when I think about where the time has gone and if I will ever be able to give him a sibling. ((Hugs))
    After many years and tears our baby boy is finally here
    Born 11-6-10

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  • jeannaqueenajeannaqueena member
    Awe, I am sorry you are feeling down.  I hope the 2ww goes fast for you.  (((HUGS)))
    TTC#1: 14 months on our own (did HSG, b/w, SA);
    BFP on Cycle 14--TWINS! Identical twin boys stillborn at 19wks(1/9/10)
    3 break cycles; took clomid 50mg, BFP #2 Beta #1 35, Beta #2 338!!! Owen was born 2/11/11! 
    TTC#2: 4 cycles on clomid: BFNs
    BFP #3: Cycle #5 100mg clomid; beta #1 21; beta #2 6=CP 
    Cycle #6 break cycle TTC no meds=BFN
    Cycle #7: 150 clomid+ovidril+IUI=BFN (switched to RE)
    Cycle #8: follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle #9 Forced break due to cyst
    Cycle #10 follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle #11 follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle#12 Forced break due to cyst, went on BCP; did repeat HSG, Saline U/S
    Cycle #13 IVF: Follistim/Menapur ER 11-30 11 eggs, 5 mature, 4 fertilized and 3dt on 12-3; BFN
    Cycle #14: IVF#2 lupron/follistim/menopur ER 1-22, 19 eggs, 14 fertilized, 5dt on 1-27, BFP!! beta 1: 63, beta 2: 119; EDD 10-15-13; 1 frozen embie
    Miracle Surprise BFP, EDD 10-1-15; saw HB great Betas, 11weeks lost baby MC at home
    Moved forward with FET transfered solo frostie on 6-4-15, beta 1: 315, beta 2: 738, u/s showed one baby on track EDD 2-21-16
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  • e74e74 member
    Right there with you as well.  Hugs!
    DS#1 born 9/23/06 
    Twins DS#2 and 3 born at 31 weeks, 3 days due to a short cervix on 8/2/13.
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  • eastsidekittyeastsidekitty member
    I'm right there with you and my son is 2.5 and I really worry about age spread. Everyone I know with a child his age has already had another or is pregnant. Its so hard. 
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  • Dan&MaggieDan&Maggie member
    Same here. Just hang in there and focus on enjoying the holidays with your sweet little one. We're all in this together!! 
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  • flows912flows912 member
    I hear ya. This week has be rough for me too. I have 1 more try with IUI before they try IVF and that scares the living crap out of me.
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    MPZ born June 2011
    TTC #2 ... Cycle 1-3: IUI = BFN | Cycle 4: IVF ... canceled but 3 snow babies
    Cycle 5: FET .. BFP! | EDD - 3/15/2014
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  • Hopeful3434Hopeful3434 member

    I have been crying about this all week as well, since my BFN I got on Sunday. This was my first IVF cycle but I just don't understand why this is happening. It was so easy to have the first one, how could this be happening to us. I am still in disbelief. My DD asks when she will have a little sister all the time and I just have no answers. I feel more disappointed for her than any of us. She lines up her dolls and tells them she has to play with them because she doesn't have a sister. OMG, I just feel hopeless.

    TTC#2 Since September 2010 with MFI - Me: 36 DH:35
    11/12: IVF ICSI #1 - BFN
    05/13 - Started IVF ICSI #2 - Menupor/Follistim/Trigger
    6/17/13 ER - 7 Retrieved, 6 matured, 4 fertilized
    6/20/13 ET - 2 transferred 0 to freeze
    7/3/13 Beta #1 = 174!  7/7/13 Beta #2 = 414!
    7/15/13 U/S #1 - Can't wait!!


     

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  • AntipodeanAntipodean

    I could have written the exact same post, my DD is 27 months, I am tinged with sadness as how grown up she is and how I haven't/can't give her a sibling.

    I am constantly surrounded by friends having more babies, i feel like the universe is laughing at me. 

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