LO does not WANT to latch correctly - what to do?

Shema N · November 2012

LO is a little over a week old and the initial week of BF?g was excruciating. In the past day or 2 I feel like I?ve finally gotten the hang of latching him correctly. When I get him on the right way I say ?ahhh no pain!? to myself.

But WHENEVER I do manage to get him to correctly latch he?ll twist and turn out of the position and back to a place where things are uncomfortable. I then unlatch him and try to relatch but inevitably it turns into a wrestling match with him twisting and turning out of position...eventually I resign myself to whatever it is he prefers and endure the feeding b/c I want to get him fed.

The other related concern to this is that he might not be getting enough and is repositioning out of frustration. The peds are satisfied with his weight gain and he does have wet and dirty diapers. But my breasts have suddenly deflated - like down to a 32A! - and when I try to express milk from them I only get a few drops. When I pump I hardly get anything...

I just don?t know what to do to fix this. Any advice?

hilsy85 · November 2012

Would it help if you swaddled him before you fed him? That way he at least can't flail his arms and legs about and it might help him focus on eating rather than moving? Also have you met with an LC? They might be able to give you better tips.

telyn · November 2012

Second the swaddle. Also, if you aren't, try football hold. When LO is feeling fighty, that position nearly always calms her down.

TJ1979 · November 2012

Have you tried laid back nursing? My LO was much calmer in that position and latched better when she was really little. It is normal for your boobs to not be as big or feel as full as your supply starts to regulate. However, if you are really worried about supply, rent a scale or find a LC or BF support group and do weighed feedings. That's really the only way to know how much LO is getting.

I am very small chested as well. Are you sure you have the right size flanges for your pump? I hardly got any when pumping either and had to go get the special smaller sized flanges. They are these little inserts that go inside the regular small sized flanges.

GL, it seems like you've had a really rough start. But if LO is learning to latch, that's great news. Keep up the good work.

pb_bride · November 2012

I agree with PPs regarding swaddling and getting help from an IBCLC. Also, do you hold him tight when you are BFing him? At 3 weeks, I still have to man-handle DS to make sure he stays on with a good latch. I do the cross-cradle hold: One hand holds the back of his head/neck and pushes his head towards my breast. That same arm keeps LO's body tight (and on his side) against my body. My other hand lifts my breast. Sometimes if I let go of one of my hands, DS may wriggle a bit and ends up with a shallower latch. If that happens, I unlatch him and start over. I too have to wrestle with DS as he thrashes his head a lot.

DO NOT allow yourself to have a painful latch! This will make you dread BFing more and more and it's a viscous cycle.

As for expressing milk, when DS was at that age, I too was only getting a drop or 2 at that point. It is normal. And the fact that your LO is gaining weight well and having plenty of wet diapers, that means he's getting enough milk. Just do not encourage him w/a bad latch!

Shema N · November 2012

Thank you all so much for your responses it makes me feel so much better! I was crying uncontrollably after our "wrestling" session today but I feel so much better reading your replies and knowing I"m not alone with these struggles. I want so badly not to fail at breastfeeding but I have this constant nagging fear of having supply issues or LO getting frustrated and dreading nursing as much as I do! I want to make this work very badly. I've been told not to get stressed as that will affect things but it's so hard for me right now.

I already had an LC visit me and go figure that things were going so smoothly when she was here and things reverted when she left.

I am going to a breastfeeding support group this week. I"m a little nervous about it. Hopefully I won't turn into a basket case! And I'm already so awkward handling him that I just can't imagine having to try feeding him on an office chair with minimal pillows. Yikes!

TJ1979 · November 2012

Shema N:

Thank you all so much for your responses it makes me feel so much better! I was crying uncontrollably after our "wrestling" session today but I feel so much better reading your replies and knowing I"m not alone with these struggles. I want so badly not to fail at breastfeeding but I have this constant nagging fear of having supply issues or LO getting frustrated and dreading nursing as much as I do! I want to make this work very badly. I've been told not to get stressed as that will affect things but it's so hard for me right now.

I already had an LC visit me and go figure that things were going so smoothly when she was here and things reverted when she left.

I am going to a breastfeeding support group this week. I"m a little nervous about it. Hopefully I won't turn into a basket case! And I'm already so awkward handling him that I just can't imagine having to try feeding him on an office chair with minimal pillows. Yikes!

If it makes you feel better, I started crying the instant I walked in the door to my first BF support group. I don't know why. But another girl walked up to me and said "Hey, it's okay. I already cried once today too." This is a support group, they are there to help, not to judge. You'll be fine. And if you feel more comfortable, take your boppy or brest friend, whatever you usually use. We had a girl with twins in our class who just set up camp on the floor. This is something to help, not to stress. It'll be great!

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