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Having a really hard time (baby ment, not mine)

juliekay25juliekay25 member
in TTC After a Loss

So I am just an absolute mess right now.  Last night my DH made me go with him to his friends house for dinner and to see their new born baby. I was so angry that I had to go and even more angry that I had to be the one to go find a baby gift for them.  Not my friends! Why should I have to do it?  Not to mention they kinda just forced the baby on me so I had to sit there and hold it for half an hour when all I wanted to do was cry.  Needless to say the second I got in the car to leave I balled my eyes out.  I even took a double dose of zanax before I went there. But it didn't seem to help. I think it may have been easier to go there if DH and I were able to try right now but since I'm on CD 69 with no sign of AF I am just super stressed and frustrated.  All I want is one of those beautiful babies of my own to hold in my arms.  At least they didn't pull the "When are you going tho have kids?" type of bullshit like everyone else does. Makes me so mad that I should be finding out the sex of my baby right about now but instead I'm in this position.  I just really hate the entire world right now.  Then on top of it I got some insane eggwhite CM today right after I made an appt. with a gyno for next week due to my super long cycle ( feel free to look at my chart). I am just more confused than ever. 

I just really needed to vent today. So thanks for taking the time to read this I know I'm not the only one who is frustrated and I appreciate all the support I get from all of you. You help me through a lot of this.

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My Ovulation Chart
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Re: Having a really hard time (baby ment, not mine)

  • km_mdkm_md member
    (((big hugs))) I am so sorry. Your DH wasn't being very sensitive to your needs by making you go there and buy the gift. What you are feeling is completely natural. It sucks. Thinking of the "shoulds" makes it worse but you just can't help but do it. I hope that today is a better day for you. 


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  • buggirl72buggirl72 member
    I'm sorry your DH made you do that. I hope you are able to have a talk with him about how you are not emotionally ready for that so he won't make you have another dinner with them. (((hugs)))

    The day the Bump died - Jasper is wise
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  • AnjaOAnjaO member
    Hugs!  That was really crappy of your DH.  

    BFP #1 8/14/10, DS born 4/30/11 
    BFP #2 9/30/12, M/C 10/23/12 
    BFP #3 12/16/12, CP 12/20/12 
    BFP #4 1/20/13, DD born 10/9/13
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
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  • heather52904heather52904 member
    I'm sorry your DH put you through all of that.  (HUGS)

    TTC Since 8/2011
    BFP #1 5/13/12 * EDD 1/24/13 * MC at 7 wks 4 days on 6/11/12
    BFP #2 5/13/13 * Current EDD 1/23/14

    Baby N born 2/8/14


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    Lilypie - (HD7B)

     

     

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  • nbcarlsonnbcarlson member
    Big hugs so sorry you had to go through all that! I really hope today is a better day for you!

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  • yesthisiskim0401yesthisiskim0401 member
    I am so, so sorry. I hope you talk to DH about how the entire situation made you feel, from buying a gift to being forced to hold a nb. For now, pour yourself some wine and draw a nice bubble bath. Hugs!!

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  • kr_rykr_ry member
    I'm sorry that you had to go through all of that. I hope your AF comes back soon so you can try again when you and your husband are ready too.
    TW loss mentioned 

    **BFP#1 9/5/12   EDD 5/15/13  changed to 5/25/13 after u/s,  missed mc 10/19/12.  D and C 10/22/12** 
     **BFP#2 9/12/13  EDD 5/16/14 changed to 5/27/14 after u/s, hb 126 on 10/11/13, miscarriage on 10/24.13**
    ~RPL testing results from 12/6/13 show everything normal except elevated prolactin. Blood work is now in the normal range. All AL welcome!
    BFP #3 10/24/14  Our rainbow baby was born July 2015
    BFP 4 10/28/19 EDD 7/6/20
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  • ErinE683ErinE683 member
    imageyesthisiskim0401:
    I am so, so sorry. I hope you talk to DH about how the entire situation made you feel, from buying a gift to being forced to hold a nb. For now, pour yourself some wine and draw a nice bubble bath. Hugs!!


    I'm sorry you're feeling so crappy. It sounds like a rough experience, and I think I'd feel really upset, too! I agree with pp, I hope you're talking to your DH. He needs to know how you're feeling, and will hopefully choose to be supportive!
    image    Image and video hosting by TinyPicimage

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  • GavinRonansMomGavinRonansMom member
    I am really sorry your DH was not understanding your needs. I would try and talk with him and let him know your needs.
    image Noah Michael, born sleeping 9/29/12 at 19w 3d. We love you forever Little Man! image
    image
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    BFP: 2/4/13 EDD: 10/11/13
    BabyFruit Ticker
    Patiently waiting for Buggirl to join me!!
    Beta #1 11dpo:89 Progesterone:38.9 Beta #2 18dpo:1940
    HB seen at 6w HB 8w 5d 176bpm! Its a BOY!
    grow rainbow grow!!!!
    All Always Welcome!!
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