Pregnant after a Loss

Malcolm & Brendan's Birth Story...Finally!!!

Short version:
Malcolm Finley was born via csection at 5:40am on Friday, November 16th and was swiftly followed by Brendan Bailey born at 5:42am. Malcolm weighed 6lbs, 7ozs, and Brendan weighed 6lbs, 6ozs.
 
Long version:
At 8pm on Wednesday the 14th we were scheduled to check in at labor and delivery to begin induction. At 7pm, the hospital called to say they were swamped and they'd call us when they were ready for us. After hours of not receiving a call, I called back at 10pm and they told us we could head over.
Once in L&D, they went over preliminary details and then started me on the balloon catheter to get me dilated. I was 1cm when I arrived, so we had a ways to go. The catheter didn't hurt, it was just kind of awkward and made getting up to pee kind of difficult. The docs also started me on a small dose of pitocin, and we waited.
Apparently the saline catheter method of dilation takes between 6-12 hours to get you 4cm dilated, but I was lucky and the cervical catheter had done its job by 6am on Thursday the 15th. So far, this was going well. They upped my pitocin and left me to dilate further.
At 11, the external monitor on Malcolm starts going totally bonkers, and my pgal brain starts freaking the heck out. They try to reposition the monitor, but can't find  him. The resident comes in with the ultrasound and dumbly fumbles around. She keeps saying "he's there" and I'm like "no crap, but is there a heartbeat?"
Her reaction? "I can't tell but I think his chest is behind your hip bone. Let's put in the internal fetal monitor". That's the one that goes in through your cervix and attaches to the baby's scalp. I'm panicking, but thankfully they get the monitor in and there's my boy's heartbeat looking nice and normal. Sigh of relief.
By noon, I was at 6cm, and the doctors were pushing to break my water and get me on the epidural. I was having contractions, but none that really felt "epidural-worthy", but I figured I'd want it before my water was broken.
Enter the anesthesiologist. He is cold and quiet, and the insertion of the epidural takes a couple tries. I feel...a little dullness, but certainly not the total numbness I'd been told to expect. However, I'm not in pain so I ignore it.
We break my water. It feels very warm and there sure is a lot of it. The doctors leave me to dilate further and up my pitocin again.
From noon until 6pm, I make no progress, except that I hit extremely painful contractions and the epidural isn't doing diddly crap. I'm crying and grabbing on to the edges of the bed. The anesthesiologist comes in again, but this time it's a new guy who is like the biggest *** in history. He gets snappy with the nurse, and asks me if I'm "uncomfortable" as I cry and wince through contractions. No crap, buddy. But instead of investigating the viability of my epidural or upping the levels, he gives me narcotics that knock me out for hours.
Early in the evening, I make it to 8cms. I'm getting hopeful! By around midnight, my doc comes in and says I'm almost there--like over 9cm. She ups my pitocin and says she's going to take a one hour nap and then we'll start pushing.
After an hour, the extremely painful contractions thing happens again and the super jerk anesthesiologist comes back and once again gives me narcotics rather than investigating my epidural. Cue another 2 hour drugged out nap. My doctor, mind you, is nowhere to be seen.
I wake up after 3am on Friday, and a resident checks my cervix and tells me there's still a little lip of cervix blocking Malcolm's head. Great. My doctor comes back in and is noticeably salty that it's taking so long. She says we're going to try to push and see if she can help Malcolm's head get through the cervix. We try pushing for about twenty minutes, but it's useless. He's not going anywhere.
My doc looks at me and says it's time for csection. My water has been broken for too long and my temperature is elevated--they're concerned about infection.
My reaction? Fine. What the heck took them so long? My doctor says she wishes that I'd stalled out earlier, to which I want to say "being stuck at 6cms for over 6 hours wasn't enough of a stall?!", but I keep it in. I'm tired and frustrated and ready to see my boys.
We head in to the OR, and I keep insisting that I'm still in pain and can still feel a fair amount--too much, I'm concerned, to be cut open. Once again, cue the narcotics. They make me a foggy mess and cause me to shake uncontrollably, but I'm not numb below the waist.
While they're setting me up, they hold my husband in a different room and don't bring him in until the very last minute, but I guess that's pretty common.
Now to the surgery--holy Jesus. I'm sure I wasn't feeling EVERYTHING, but I was feeling enough to be crying and screaming as they pulled the boys out of me. I was so drugged and in so much pain that I couldn't even enjoy looking over at my boys as they were placed in the bed to my left. I looked enough to see that they were adorable and alive, but that was about it.
As they sewed me up, the pain intensified and I started shouting obscenities. At one point my husband says that I passed out, but honestly the whole thing is pretty cloudy in my head. I just remember being in way more pain than I expected with an epidural, and after talking to others, I'm skeptical about the level and/or placement of my epidural.
All that aside, my delivery resulted in two healthy, nice sized baby boys and a sore but alive mama. That's all that matters to me.
Malcolm spent 36 hours in the NICU and Brendan spent closer to 60 hours there because of their blood sugar levels and they had to be given antibiotics due to my infection from my broken water. I know we're lucky that it wasn't longer, but it was still hard to be away from them. I couldn't really get out of bed for like 24 hours, so I didn't get to see or hold them until Saturday afternoon/evening. Because they were fed formula in the NICU, getting them on breastfeeding was tough, but by the time they came home they were formula free, so my worry was all for nothing!
 
Since getting home, we've needed a crazy amount of help. Likely literally there is almost always a third person in our house because the boys won't sleep in their pack n play or crib. I absolutely recommend getting bassinets or some tighter sleeping area, but it might just be a matter of time. We've had success with the swing and, oddly enough, their car seats.

 

Thank you so much for all your support through the past nine months! I hope you all have happy and healthy pregnancies!

 


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Lost our first little peanut on 1/17/2012 at 9 weeks and 5 days. We miss you little blessing, but we know you were too perfect for this world.
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Re: Malcolm & Brendan's Birth Story...Finally!!!

  • Your boys are beautiful!  Congrats!  I can't believe that they did not check that the epidural was not working!  I don't know what I would do if I were in your situation about this, but I do know that is not right!  I am so sorry that your labor experience was so horrible.

    ETA: spelling


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  • SO excited that you are all home safely, sorry for all the pain and the OB who you wanted to shake but it all ended happily! Congrats!!
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  • Jeez!  Look at how cute those boys are!  Congrats!

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    Phoebe Jordan Born 3/20/13

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  • They are so, so beautiful! Congrats!
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  • I am sorry you had a rough delivery, but your boys are beautiful and these pictures are so amazing!


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  • Your boys are perfect! Congrats! I am so sorry you had such a sh*tty birth experience... I really recommend contacting the hospital's patient relations person about the anesthesiologist.
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  • Just glad they're here safe and sound, and you're recovering nicely!

    I'm also thrilled to be using a different hospital! Hate so much what all you had to go through. 

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    We lost our first (EDD 07/23/12) after finding out at 12 weeks there was no longer a heartbeat. Our rainbow was born 05/22/13 and was worth all we went through.

    “So can you understand? Why I want a daughter while I’m still young? I wanna hold her hand and show her some beauty before all this damage is done. But if it’s too much to ask, it’s too much to ask … Then send me a son.” – Arcade Fire
  • Your boys are just beautiful!! You must be so proud!

    I hate that you had such a hard time, but the are safe and sound in your arms now and that is all that matters.

    Me: 37 DH: 40 TTC since 9/09
    #1 BFP 1/10/11; missed m/c discovered 7w5d
    IF Dx: Endo, hetero MTHFR mutation, poor morphology
    #1 IUI: 1/18/12 = BFN
    #1 IVF/ICSI 4/2/12 = 2 x 7-cell and 1 x 5-cell transferred (3dt) = BFP!!
    H was born at 41w2d on 12/29/12 - be still my heart!
    #2 IVF/ICSI 1/19/14 = 2 x 8 cells transferred (3dt) = BFP!! EDD 10/09/14
    M&W born at 37 weeks on 9/18/14 - I am the momma of 3 boys!!!

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  • They are gorgeous and perfect but holy shizz your birth story scares the daylights outta me!  I'm so glad the three of you are doing well now.

    Cycle 7: BFP 1-17-12, Missed Miscarriage at 8w6d (measured 7w2d, no HB), D&C 2-29-12
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  • Congrats on your beautiful boys!

    I'm so sorry that your birth experience was so painful and scary.  ((Hugs))

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  • Your boys are adorable!!!  I am so sorry that you had to deal with all of that (pain and jerky anesthesiologist).

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickersLilypie - (B9PH)

     

    Lilypie - (0YVF)
     TTC since 11/2009; Lap/HSG/Hysteroscopy: 5/2011 (endometriosis - removed; endocervical polyp - removed; high pressure in bilateral tubes - cleared)

    BFP #1: 8/4/11; DS1 born sleeping on 11/16/11 at 19w1d

    BFP # 2: 5/7/12, EDD 1/10/13, DS2 born 1/4/13

    BFP # 3: 11/8/13, EDD 7/17/14, mmc 10wks

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  • First: Congratulations and the boys are soooo sweet!!  Second: Holy Moley  I can't believe you endured all that. Narcotics!??!  Not OK. So not OK.  I would file a complaint against the hospital. There is no way you should have gone that long.
    DS born 2009
    BFP#2 ~ 8/2/11, EDD 4/11/12, D&C 9/12/11 at 9w5d
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  • Congrats on your beautiful boys. I'm so sorry about your crappy c-section. That sounds awful. I would definitely be talking/filing a complaint with the hospital. That just sounds bizarre. When I had DS I also had a failed epidural. The anesthesiologist had to give me 4 shots of morphine before I was numb enough for surgery. He told me that he would give me 1 more if the 4th did not work and if #5 did not work either than they would knock me out completely. I wonder why they didn't do this with you? How horribly traumatic.

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    TTC Baby Rob #1 05/07, BFP 06/07, EDD 02/22/08, Baby Jackaroo born via c-section after 22 hours of labor on 02/27/08
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    TTC Baby Rob #2 06/11 BFP 11/06/11 EDD 07/16/12 Natural M/C 11/25/11 @ 6w3d
    Baby Rob #2 (Sloane), in our hearts always.
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    Here comes Baby Rob #3
     BFP on Cycle 17 09/27/12. EDD 06/04/12! Please Stick Baby! A/S 01/22/13 Baby looking great. Officially TEAM BLUE! Jack is getting a Baby Brother! RCS scheduled for 05/29/13. William Daryll born at 9:59am on 05/29/13. Left ovary and tube removed due to peach sized tumor found during RCS. Pathology came back benign!



  • Congrats on your boys!
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  • Congrats on your boys they are adorable! That was quite the crazy birth story but I am glad you are home safe and sound with your boys.
  • Oh my goodness! I am so sorry about your birth experience. A complaint is definitely in order. Yikes!

    Your boys are absolutely gorgeous though. 

    BFP#1 12/18/10 EDD 8/28/11 | 2/14/11 discovered that our baby girl had anencephaly D&C 2/17/11 at 12.5 weeks | no O or AF post loss - Dx: AO + mild PCOS = secondary infertility Provera after 70 days = AF but no O | Provera + 50mg Clomid after 110 days = AF but no O 3 rounds of 100mg Clomid + Estrogen + Progesterone = mixed O results, all BFN hysteroscopy 1/6/12 - removed fibroid tissue injection cycle #1 - 75 IU follistim + ovidrel (triggered 2/9/12) + endometrin = BFP! EDD 11/3/12 | Beta @ 13dpo = 184, 17dpo = 993, 26dpo = >5000 IT'S TWIN BOYS!! Tommy and Charlie arrived on 9/10/12 after less than 6 hours of labor at 32 weeks Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Image and video hosting by TinyPic Lilypie Premature Baby tickers
  • Congratulations on the birth of your beautiful boys!  But holy crap what you went through.  You are one tough mama!

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    BFP#2 3/25/12 ~ Heartbeat 141 4/16/12 ~ No heartbeat 4/25/12 ~ D&C 04/30/12 
    BFP#3 7/16/12 ~ EDD 3/26/13 ~ It's a BOY ~ DOB 2/26/13






  • Oh my gosh, they are adorable. What an insane birth story. I am so glad you get to rest and heal and be with them. Congratulations to the whole family and welcome Malcolm and Brendan! 
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    EDD 1/31/13, MC May 17. EDD 3/31/13, MC July 26. I miss you so much already my angel loves

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