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TTC After a Loss
dandywarhol
member
My mom is obsessed with the idea of surrogacy.
dandywarhol
member
When ever I discuss with my mother the options for having a family she immediately jumps to the idea of surrogacy and then offers up my sister's uterus.
BFP #1 - Missed M/C, D&C 3.21.11
BFP #2 - Sylvie V. Q. born and died on 10.28.11 at 21w.
BFP #3 - Evie V. Q. Fetal demise @ 16w. DC 7.8.12
BFP #4 - Beatrix V. Q. Born 6.2.13 at 23w6d.
My blog My chart
BFP #2 - Sylvie V. Q. born and died on 10.28.11 at 21w.
BFP #3 - Evie V. Q. Fetal demise @ 16w. DC 7.8.12
BFP #4 - Beatrix V. Q. Born 6.2.13 at 23w6d.
My blog My chart
This discussion has been closed.
Re: My mom is obsessed with the idea of surrogacy.
Ugh, so helpful. Sorry you have to deal with that.
July TTCAL Siggy Challenge - Favorite Children's Book
Surprise BFP 5/15/12, EDD 1/29/13, mm/c @ 8wks, discovered at 11wks, D&C 7/11/12
AF finally arrived on Christmas after 167 days of waiting.
TTA until January 2014
PGAL/PAL always welcome
In memory of Corbin Scott 10/28/11-12/3/11. Heaven got another angel the night you left this world behind Heaven got a little better the day it took you away from me Missing you tonight, see you again sometime For now I'll close my eyes and dream of heaven tonight I'll love you forever I'll like you for always Now and Forever My baby you'll be
corbinsmommy.blogspot.com
BFP #2 - Sylvie V. Q. born and died on 10.28.11 at 21w.
BFP #3 - Evie V. Q. Fetal demise @ 16w. DC 7.8.12
BFP #4 - Beatrix V. Q. Born 6.2.13 at 23w6d.
My blog My chart
Oh that would piss me off, I find it to be one of the MOST insensitive comments! I'm sorry! I've had people offer the same to me and at this point I'd almost love for them to try....Go ahead, carry my baby. They'll die in your ute too.
[spoiler] My Blog: Grow Baby Grow
BFP #1: 12/2009 m/c 1/2010 BFP #2: 6/2010 m/c 8/2010
BFP #3: 10/2011 ectopic 11/2011 (right tube removed, learned left tube was probably nonfunctional due to scar tissue from infection after m/c)
3 failed IUIs, IVF #1: 18R, 12M, 10F, 3 poor quality 5d embryos transferred= BFP #4!!!!!
Betas: 9dp5dt: 64 ~14dp5dt: 91 (expecting miscarriage, doubling time of 236 hours) ~16dp5dt: 200~18dp5dt: 500
First Ultrasound at 6w2d revealed two sacs, only one with a heartbeat
LK arrived after 42 weeks on August 14, 2013! Beautiful, healthy, and happy!
TTC#2: IVF booked for April 2015
Surprise BFP#5 February 19, 2015 EDD: November 2, 2015
Betas: 10dpo: 10, 14dpo: 77, 17dpo: 270
First Ultrasound at 5w1d showed a miracle UTE baby! And right ovary ovulation to left fallopian tube.
JD arrived at 38 weeks on October 20, 2015.
TTC #3: Since October 2017. BFP #6 July 2, 2018 EDD: March 16, 2019 [/spoiler]
TTC #1 since Sept 2011
BFP#1 1/31/12. Empty sac discovered 3/5/12. MTX due to location in uterine horn.
BFP#2 2/27/13. Empty sac confirmed 3/20/13. Mifepristone + cytotec.
Currently TTA until Fall 2013, waiting for operative hysteroscopy
Blog Chart
Oof. 'Cuz it's SO easy to just *poof* and your sis can be your gestational carrier.
Urgh.
Yikes.
Sorry you have to listen to that. ((hugs)) I always get the 'at least you can get pregnant' line from my mom. I love her and I know she's trying to make everything sound better for me but sometimes it's best just to daydream while they talk.
BFP #1 11/18/11 - m/c 12/24/11 blighted ovum - EDD 08/01/12
BFP #2 08/04/12 - m/c 08/29/12 no answers - EDD 04/17/13
BFP #3 10/01/12 - m/c 10/30/12 uniparental disomy - EDD 06/04/13
BFP #4 04/12/13 - EDD 12/22/13 It's a GIRL!
compound heterozygous MTHFR - All AL Welcome
I know, right? I think my sister would but she's 41 now and had a difficult time with her pregnancy. Plus all the jealousy/control issues I would have with my baby in her ute.
BFP #2 - Sylvie V. Q. born and died on 10.28.11 at 21w.
BFP #3 - Evie V. Q. Fetal demise @ 16w. DC 7.8.12
BFP #4 - Beatrix V. Q. Born 6.2.13 at 23w6d.
My blog My chart
I feel you. I just try to focus on her intentions when she starts talking about such things (and try not to strangle her!).
BFP #2 - Sylvie V. Q. born and died on 10.28.11 at 21w.
BFP #3 - Evie V. Q. Fetal demise @ 16w. DC 7.8.12
BFP #4 - Beatrix V. Q. Born 6.2.13 at 23w6d.
My blog My chart
This.
BFP #1 07/04/10. EDD 03/14/11. Missed m/c 08/09/10. D&C 09/27/10. }Casey & Jaimie{
TTA for 18 months and then TTC for 12 months
TTA for 7 months
Jan-Mar 2014 - RPL, SHG, karotyping: all results normal
TTC Again May 2014
Progesterone & baby aspirin combo for 5 cycles - All BFN's
SA with DNA fragmentation = Perfect results
Diagnostic cycle monitoring = Polycystic ovaries leading to premature egg release
TTA Oct 2014 - Jan 2015
Jan 2015 - Medicated cycle with timed intercourse
My Blog: The Canadian Housewife PGAL/PAL Welcome My Chart
That's what I was wondering. I'm sorry, that is so frustrating and upsetting.
On a lesser scale, my mother asked me yesterday if I was making sure to take my prenatal vitamins (as if that's what is causing my losses). I got pretty pissed and told her so. I know she's coming from a good place, but really?!
Wondering the same thing! Dandy- I am so sorry your mom is trying to be "helpful," in all the wrong ways. I have to admit that I chuckled a little bit after reading that she offered up your sissy's ute and how bluntly you put it. Some people, even the ones we love the most, just don't get it!
Oh Running, I am so sorry! Sometimes our loved ones just don't get it. Obviously you are taking your prenatals.
ETA Do we have a thread that is just "the dumb sh!t our people say to be "helpful"?" I think we need one...
Wow! That's a whole new level of... just wow!
I'm so sorry you have to deal with that!
Welcome to the world Little Girl! Born on her due date! September 8, 2013, 7lb 11.8oz, 19.5" long.
My sister is 11 months younger than me and even if she was willing to do that I couldn't imagine seeing her pregnant for nine months with my child. It would just be a nightmare. I'm so sorry your mom keeps bringing this up!
That's ridiculous. My sister offered to be a gestational carrier for me, and I would honestly be thrilled if we thought that was a viable option that wouldn't end exactly the same way my own pregnancies have ended. But it's not anybody else's place to suggest that. Having somebody else carry your baby for 9 months, birth it, and then hand it over is not a subject to be taken lightly.
TTC since March 2010 ~ Dx Unexplained IF September 2011
2011: IUI + Clomid = CP#1
2012: 3 more IUIs + Clomid = 3 more CPs. One on-our-own pg, also CP
2013: BTB IUI + Lupron/Follistim/Prometrium/PIO = CP #6
IF testing, RPL testing, Autoimmune testing = all normal
So lost.
Agree. I have a friend who had someone offer to be a surrogate for her. It was a decision that took a long time for her and her DH to come to.
Sorry your mom is pushing this on you (((hugs)))
The day the Bump died - Jasper is wise
Def. Agree to this statement. There are so many factors that would need to be taken in to consideration. I think it's wonderful that people do this for others, but there's a huge risk with people who know each other. I mean think about how you felt with your own loss with your own body. If that were to happen with somebody you know and with your baby, then how would you feel? I can't even begin to think about how I would feel towards that person possibly (even though it wouldn't be their fault) or how that person may feel.
BFP#4 3/17/14 - rainbow Baby BOY arrived 11/10/14 !!
DX: Uterine Septum - Resection 9/5/13 || MTHFR Hetero A1298C || My Chart