C-sections

Questions for STM

I am having a c-section 12/03 and unfortunately, due to his work schedule, my DH won't be able to spend much time with me in the hospital or at home.  If he's not working he's not getting paid.  So, for you STM's who have already done this, do you think I will be okay on my own after just a few days?  I plan on spending all 96 hours in the hospital, that's what my insurance allows providing no complications, and then he will be home with me the first full day home but then he's back to work.  Should I ask someone else to be with me or should i be okay after 4-5 days?

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Re: Questions for STM

  • If you plan on camping out in one room and not cleaning, cooking, or moving much, you'll probably be fine on your own. (unless you have one of those showers that aren't bath-tubs, I wouldn't attempt to shower when you are alone the first few days) I also wouldn't plan to use multiple levels of the house or to get much done. If you want cleaning/cooking etc. to happen, I would definitely ask for someone to do that for you.
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  • Ditto what PP said - if you stick to a small area (and one level) of your house and let cleaning go, then you'd probably be okay without help. You can freeze meals ahead of time - you definitely won't want to cook.

    It would be helpful if someone could come for a few hours a day so that you can rest, shower, etc. If someone could stay with you, that would be good, too, if having company doesn't stress you out and you know the person would help and not cause more stress. (Company stresses me out.)

    My perspective is a bit skewed because DS had to stay in the hospital 9 days for pneumonia (and I stayed with him). Having the nurses on call to help was great, and it took about a week for me to really feel up to speed and comfortable with doing everything. I had a pretty easy recovery, but still had to take it easy for three or four weeks.

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  • I agree with everyone else. My mom came for about 5 hrs a day for the first 3 days DH was back to work and it was a huge help. The problem with a csection is that getting up from couch or bed is so uncomfortable. So your helper can grab you stuff and you can stay in one spot with baby. And nap! Because you just had major surgery. 
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  • Is this your first?  If so, yes you would be able to do it after a few days by yourself, I did, hubby stayed home a couple days, but he went back to work right away b/c my mom and nana came and helped me!  I didn't move much and they came and helped clean and cook.  Stairs are practically impossible the first week- two weeks, so if you have a multi level home make sure everything you need is on the level you are going to be on. 

    If you have another LO to chase after, DEF NOT!  You will need the help! You won't be able to chase after a LO and take care of baby and you.  

    Also, word of the wise, make sure you know your hospitals policy b/c my hospitals policy is an adult has to stay in the room the first 24 hrs or baby has to go to nursery.  So if he's not planning on staying with you make sure someone else is there.  

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  • I was in your same situation when I had my son in May. DH had to work and was not able to spend but the few days I was in the hospital and the memorial Monday with us at home. I had no issues taking care of my almost 2 year old DD and DS at the time. We pretty much camped out in the living room all day. DD napped in her toddler bed and we watched TV, read books, colored etc. When DH got home at night he would take DD outside to run around and play. He took care of most of the cleaning and cooking for the first few weeks. I think if you really take it easy and not over due it you will be fine.
  • I was fine--I was doing stairs (tho slowly), showering etc;  essentially I was doing everything I always did just a little more slowly/carefully.  Everyone heals differently, though.  
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  • I would not have survived without DH home with me. He took 2 weeks FMLA, and I needed him the whole time. My recovery was difficult, and included an opened incision, an infection, and a spinal headache. I also had trouble nursing, and had to pump.
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  • You'll be just fine. The day will go by fast and before you know it, DH will be home from work. You and baby can sleep a lot. My husband has never stayed overnight with me at the hospital and it's been fine, but I was also okay with my babies getting formula for night feeds. I think that part depends on your hospitals' regulations. I would call for my baby once I woke up, or DH would stop and get her on his way in and bring her to me. Then she would breastfeed all day with no problems.
  • My mom came to help, but really she just took care of cleaning and cooking.  I took care of the baby and myself.  I was BFing, but I did not have to pump.  That would have made things more difficult.

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  • imageWorcbride:
    I was fine--I was doing stairs (tho slowly), showering etc;  essentially I was doing everything I always did just a little more slowly/carefully.  Everyone heals differently, though.  

    Same here. DD was in the NICU for the first two nights and I think that made me get up and move more in the hospital. DH was off for two weeks but I was up and moving. He mostly took care of cooking and cleaning. You'll be fine if you stick to one room and don't worry about cooking and cleaning. 


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  • It can be done if this is your first baby and if you have no complications.  However, you had better arrange a backup plan in case you have a complication or don't find it manageable.  My mom comes and stays with me for a week and DH takes a week vacation so I get a total of two weeks with help. 
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  • Well, I can pretty much stay in one room until I have to use the bathroom.  It's upstairs.  I had one c-section before but had complications that kept me in the hospital for a total of 10 days.  I know I will have to take it slow and not push myself.  DH taking time off is not going to happen because we need the paycheck but my mom said she could come over in the evenings and help for a while. 

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