Late Term and Child Loss

Lurker question

What do you girls consider a late pregnancy loss?  I lost my Sweet baby girl this week at 18-19 weeks due to enlarged ventricles in her brain and tons and tons or fluid in her brain.  I am having my d&e tomorrow :(

I have posted some on miscarriage/pregnancy loss board and was wondering what the difference was in that board and this one.  I feel weird calling mine a miscarriage when she had something so wrong with her body and it wasn't just the pregnancy not being viable.  

Anyway...hope this makes sense...Ian just trying to figure out which board I belong to? 

Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

8/12-Suprise BFP- Sweet Bunny Born Sleeping 11/21/12 (19 weeks)

-5/7/13- MMC (8 Weeks)

11/6/13- BO discovered at 7 weeks- natural MC 11/25/13

8/14- Surpise IF dx...low AMH (.24)- moving on to IVF

IVF #1- 11/14- 6R5M4F=2 perfect frosties

12/19/14- FET of 2 embabies = BFP!!!  One Little Bean EDD: 9/3/15

Everyone Welcome.

Re: Lurker question

  • I'm so sorry for the loss of your daughter. Did you name her?

    The medical world seems to use the 20 week mark to delineate between a miscarriage and other losses. I think late losses are more thought of after the 30+ mark, and I would call your loss more of a mid-term loss but regardless, you are welcome here.  And I'm sorry to have to welcome you here considering the circumstances.

    BFP #1 - Missed M/C, D&C 3.21.11

    BFP #2 - Sylvie V. Q. born and died on 10.28.11 at 21w. Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    BFP #3 - Evie V. Q. Fetal demise @ 16w. DC 7.8.12
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    BFP  #4 - Beatrix V. Q. Born 6.2.13 at 23w6d.
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  • Ditto the PP. I think a late loss is a third tri loss. My loss was 41 weeks, I think that's as late as they go! :(

    However I would welcome you here as 18 weeks is a lot further than the other losses you are probably seeing on the other board. A loss is a loss regardless of when it happens, but depending on when it does, it's easier to relate to certain groups of people. If that is us for you, then post away! 

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
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  • I am so sorry for the loss of your precious baby girl. I agree with mdharrison, post wherever you feel comfortable.You may be able to relate more to the M/PL board on some things and more our board on other things. We all generally mix together on TTCAL and PgAL when we are ready to take those steps.


      Our Angel Patricia born sleeping 3/30/12 at 31 weeks
    Our Fighter Anna born early 1/8/13 at 26 weeks
    Hoping to bring home #3 due 9/9/15
  • I am sorry for the loss of your sweet little girl.  

    I agree with the other replies, you should post where ever you feel most comfortable. You may find that you relate to some of the women here and some on the MC board.  I also consider a late loss to be a loss in the third trimester.  But, you will also find women who have lost children at different stages of pregnancy here, as well as women how have lost a child later on.  It all comes down to where you feel most comfortable.   

    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers 

    BFP #1 Jan. 2011 - mmc Mar. 2011 
    BFP #2 Aug. 2011 - My sleeping angel Stella, born April 21, 2012 
    BFP #3 Nov. 2012 - mmc Dec. 2012
    BFP #4 April 2013 - mc May 2013
    BFP #5 Sept. 2013 - EDD 5.24.14
  • Marylaurena, I am so sorry for the loss of your sweet baby girl. I have experienced a similar loss. At 21 weeks we lost our daughter to severe hydro.cephalus and dandy_walker_malformation. (sorry for the "."' and "_"s I'm not totally comfortable with that being searchable). Her neurological abnormalities were so severe that she was not expected to survive gestation, but if she did, she had such little brain matter that she was not expected to survive for long. Therefore we made the choice to break our own hearts, thoroughly and completely, and terminated for medication reasons. I call our experience a loss, where others might not, because it was a loss; we wanted her so completely and already loved her irrevocably. I did not want to her little body to be so broken, but it was.   

    To answer your questions: I think you can call your experience whatever you need to. I also think you can post to any board that moves you and provides you the resources that you're looking for. On the bump, I feel most comfortable on this board. I have also had a 9 week loss (with a D&C) and felt for me that the miscarriage board was well suited for that. My most recent loss has been so much more staggering and challenging and just plain difficult to endure. While I didn't make it to full term, I just feel that I can relate more to emotions and stories here.   

    all my best to you and your family.

     

    I am a mother to two daughters. Our first is a lovely and vibrant three-year old. Our second, passed away during the sixth month of pregnancy (June 2012).
  • I am sorry for your loss. I think you are definitely welcome here and fit in here. I am sad to welcome you here, but I hope you'll find some comfort. Feel free to ask anything, you are among friends (((hugs)))
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
    Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers
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  • I am so terribly sorry for the loss of your baby girl.  I lost my daughter at 19 weeks, 3 days and I feel more comfortable posting here than on the miscarriage/loss board.  I endured 26 hours of labor and delivery on October 4th...I held my baby girl in my arms and so did dh.  She is buried in a cemetery nearby.  I can't call her a "miscarriage" even though the medical world would consider her a late term loss and not a stillborn.  I feel more connected to the moms here.  You are more than welcome to post here and the other moms have been super supportive to me.  Again, I am so sorry for your loss and please take all the time you need to grieve and work through this,  we are here for you.  ((Hugs))
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

     Lilypie Angel and Memorial tickers

    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker

    BFP#1 - 11/27/09 EDD 8/5/10, DS1 arrived 7/24/10 via emergency c-section.

    BFP#2 - 6/18/12 EDD 2/23/13, sweet baby girl born sleeping on 10/4/12 at 19 weeks, 3 days.

    BFP #3 - 1/18/13 EDD 10/1/13, natural mc on 2/2/13 at 5 weeks, 4 days.

    BFP #4 - 8/29/13 EDD 5/12/14, our sweet rainbow, DS2 born 4/29/14 via c-section

  • I am so sorry for your loss.  I also felt more comfortable on this board than on the miscarriage board.  My son was born at 20 weeks and was a live birth. While I know my loss was much earlier than many of the women on this board,  no one here has ever made me feel that it was not a "late" enough loss.

    The day the Bump died - Jasper is wise
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  • So sorry for your loss. We also lost our baby girl due to a fatal genetic condition that she had. Please feel free to private message me. Lots of hugs to you.
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