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I'm Ready....but Daddy to be isnt?

Patience88Patience88 member
in New to The Bump
Hi there. I've been wishing, dreaming, and praying for children for about 8 years, and am currently working on my 19th week of pregnancy with my first child, which is going to be a boy. I have to admit, I kinda pressured my SO into "knocking me up" as it were, but I also explained to him that if he wasnt ready I understood! Now, i got the response that "after such and such a date, I will stop caring and if it happens it happens, if it doesnt it doesnt". much to his surprise a month later when I was pregnant. So we have been going through all of the little milestones, eg: hearing baby's heartbeat, first and second ultrasound, finding out the sex, and so on. But SO does not seem to be excited or even happy for that matter when for example I ran into the shop and put my phone to his ear cause I just captured the heart beat on my phone at my prenatal visit. He pushed the phone away and says "Yes, thats great" and continues his shop talk with the guys. And when it comes time to talking about the big day, he says hes not sure he wants to be in the room. I just went for my second ultrasound without him, and am a little worried about the future of this pregnancy, I know that when My son is here, SO's attitude will change, but does that mean I must endure the entire pregnancy alone?
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Re: I'm Ready....but Daddy to be isnt?

  • erickag1985erickag1985
    Well, I'm not expert, that's for sure, but my suggestion would be to just talk to him. Tell him you feel like he doesn't care and ask him if he really does. As far as the whole phone in the shop thing. That would have gotten me upset, but looking from the outside, maybe he doesn't want to "ruin" his "coolness" in front of the guys. I was having a similar problem and occasionally still do, but my problem is that I feel my husband cares more for his truck and motorcycle than the baby. One time I blew up and started crying and told him other people would ask how I'm feeling but he doesn't, and how I hated that he made a list of things he needs to do to "Ruby" his truck, but he's never thought about the things we need to get the baby. Anyhow, I say talk to him, before you blow up, and that's very likely considering the hormones.
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  • kerbear135kerbear135 member
    You definitely need to sit him down and tell him how you're feeling, find out what page he's on. That being said, sometimes it's harder for Dads-to-be to connect during the pregnancy- keep in mind he isn't feeling every little change you are feeling. My DH didn't get real into it until we found out our LO was a girl and picked a name. It could be that once you get a name, and your SO feels the baby moving around, he may get more excited...but you need to talk to him and find out b/c if he's not on board, it'd be better to know now than wait till your LO's here.


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    BFP #1 12/02/11, M/C 12/08/11
    BFP #2 04/06/12, DD born 12/20/12
    BFP #3 06/09/14, M/C 06/15/14
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