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Blended Families
Custody Agreement "Extras"
I am trying to put together a proposed custody agreement so my LO's father and I can avoid going to court if possible.
Right now all I have is EOWE visits, midweek visit, summer and holidays. LO isn't in school yet so I have it that visits will have to be readdressed before he starts school.
But does anyone have "extras" included?
Examples: life insurance, college savings (not that it has to be paid for but maybe some money deposited into a 529), both parents having to alternate taking off if LO is sick, if LO has to get allergy shots, who is responsible for taking LO or a drinking/smoking around LO clause.
I'm sure there is tons of others that could be included too or do most Custody Agreements just include visit days and times?
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Re: Custody Agreement "Extras"
in mine there is a clause regarding medical insurance and that XFIL is not allowed contact with the kids.
based off some of the things i read here I would put something about phone contact for when the child with the other parent
I would not include talks about college. Honestly, once it is written and approved by a judge, it is now a legal obligation that you will have to comply with.
What if your LO doesnt "deserve" college? What if YOU cannot afford to pay for college?
I am asking H to carry life insurance. It's not as much as I would like for DD, but it's something. So I made stipulations on that.
I'd put a college fund request in there too, but I'll be lucky if he can keep the life insurance and pay child support.
We have our birthdays, her birthdays, mother's and father's day listed in addition to the holidays you listed above.
I have several of H's family member's listed that can not be around DD unsupervised and good solid reason and proof to back it up - drug abuse, felony charges, threatening letters and mental health history - all on going for several years - so it's likely to hold up in court.
We have alternating years for who gets to claim DD on taxes.
We outline as well that both get say in her education, religious upbringing, medical decision, etc.
The custody agreement we have right now is official and court ordered but its very general. I have primary physical custody and we share legal.
Right now my son doesn't spend the night at his father's and his father wants to start. I just want to avoid going to court and having someone else make the decisions for us if we can avoid it.
Our CO doesn't mention college savings and I wouldn't add that in personally. Nor does it mention him being sick - that's parenting. If it's your time and the kid is sick then deal with it. When DS was a baby I always took him when he was sick but that was because it was "too hard" for BD.
I would put in there who gets to claim on taxes, child support, medical insurance, percentage responsible for out of pocket expenses (in my state it is done by income so I pay 25% and BD pays 75%), extra activity fees and agreeing to take DS to those activities, specific times for pick up and drop off, what if the weather is really bad during an exchange time, vacation days so one parent can take DS extra for special occasions, holiday schedule, etc. GL!
It sounded like he had custody and you had EOWE which is why I was confused.
Oh sorry for the confusion. I ment it as what I already had written in my offer to him. Just trying to cover as many topics as possible and make it reasonable for both of us.
Ours has a non-parental alienation clause in it (basically if you can't say anything nice, don't say anything at all).
I wish ours was more specific about finances. Are you each going to be required to pay for half of extra curriculars? What about medical copays, prescriptions, etc...? What about incidental expsenses (school field trips, a whole new wardrobe after he goes through a growth spurt, etc...)?
This. Definitely have the p/u d/o schedule in there. Taxes too. DH's X has been claining kids on taxes, moved an hour away, and refuses to do p/u. We took her back to court and the judge laughed in her face. We split holidays and she is no longer celebrating them because she is converting to JW, but she refuses to give them to us for them... so back to court for that too. Make sure that you also put a religious clause in there. We have it so she CANNOT make them go to bible study (she tries), and we are going for full custody because of that (and it looks like we will get it since she continuously violates the CO).