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Is my baby too dependent on me?

Flyinhy37Flyinhy37 member
in Attachment Parenting
Over time I've progressed from nursing to sleep to bed sharing. Whenever I try no cry sleep training approaches it seems to make her wake more and stressed and as a result I'm up more and stressed.

It seems I am no longer able to put her down to sleep anywhere. Others can if they get her to fall asleep first but I can not. Is this something she will naturally grow out of or will I need to train her?
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Re: Is my baby too dependent on me?

  • ncbellencbelle member

    How old is she?  Do you mean that you need to hold her while she's asleep?  Naps or nighttime?  Sorry so many questions ;)

    In general though I don't think a baby can be too dependent on her caregiver - the most important thing is that she feel secure and loved.  Depending on her age, there are some things you can do to help her to sleep without needing to be held.  However, she will grow out of the need on her own...sometime.  I wore both of my kids for naps until 8-10 months or so - they sleep fine on their own now :) 



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  • Flyinhy37Flyinhy37 member
    Thanks for your reply. My baby turns 7 months tomorrow. I used to nurse her to sleep and then put her in the RnP. Throughout the night she began ending up in bed with me more and more. She wasn't transitioning out of the RnP well so I started nursing her in our bed so she could fall asleep on a flat surface. Now, it seems I can't put her down for naps or for sleep. I commonly let her nap on me before.

    I'm on with it most of the time. I just wanted to make sure that one day she will outgrow it on her own. When I try to put her down now she gets upset and it's not fun for either of us.
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  • Emerald27Emerald27 member

    I have always nursed DS to sleep for naps and at bedtime. Lately, he nurses and then rolls over to fall asleep. He likes to sleep with his back against me and his arms out straight, but it is a step toward independence.

    I was sure that this kid was going to sleep latched forever! He used to spend long stretches of the night latched. It didn't bother me, but it did make me worry a little about our eventual transition to independent sleep...how hard would it be?

    Now I realize that just like learning to pass a toy between two hands, to sit up unassisted, or to crawl, learning to fall asleep on one's own is a natural milestone. There was no real cause for concern. He's napping next to me right now. :)

     

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  • MomtoHMomtoH member
    I used to nurse my DD and my DH would put her to bed.  Now, I nurse her to sleep, put her in her crib, and then usually nurse her back to sleep another time or two before I go to sleep.  She also nurses a good 2-4 times at night and sleeps with us.  Sometimes I wish I could just get a break, but I know it's normal for her to be totally dependent on me.  I am her food, which also happens to be her source of comfort.  My husband and I were talking the other night about her sleeping in her crib.  We came to the conclusion that she doesn't want to sleep in her crib overnight because she needs the comfort of nursing and touch all night.  One day I'll want her curled up next to me, so I'm savoring it right now. :)
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