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Bedsharing

MrsW101011MrsW101011 member
in Attachment Parenting

I have a 4 week old that I tried to transition into his crib from a PNP in our room but he wants to nurse every 1-2 hours during the night and I just can't do it. It works better for us all to just let him sleep with me and let him nurse whenever he feels like it.

My questions are, what are the rules for bedsharing, I don't really know much about it, and how do I transition him into his own bed as soon as possible? I don't really want to bedshare, just for my own comfort, I'd prefer to be able to stretch out and move around but for now, I feel like bedsharing is the right thing for us.

I was thinking about trying the crib again at about 3 months to see if he can make it longer stretches, but I'm nervous that after so long of being able to nurse whenever he feels like it he won't know to load up before bed and therefore won't be able to make it long and will just always be sleeping in our bed.

 TIA



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Re: Bedsharing

  • kkidd28kkidd28 member
    Since he's eating so often, I suggest waiting till he's older to move him. I nurse my LO right before bed, then put her in the bassinet when she gets tired.  When she wakes in the middle of the night to feed, I try to put her back in the bassinet, if not she is in the middle of the bed - i have put my hubby out of the bed cause I dont trust him to be aware of her - lol!  I put her in her crib during the day for naps.  I wont transition her out of my bedroom till she's at least 3 months due to the SIDS risk as per my pedi.  HTH!  GL!
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  • grangerizegrangerize member
    After many sleepless nights, I realized that my daughter, who is 8 weeks, absolutely refuses to sleep anywhere else but with me. It freaked me out to bedshare at first, but after doing research on safe ways to, I feel much more comfortable. The biggest things are continuing to bf, only let them sleep next to you not dh, no blankets above waist, one or no pillows, and I also wear tank tops so that I don't have loose sleeves/clothing.
    I also just purchased Dr. Sears Attachment Parenting book and have really enjoyed his thoughts on how natural and beneficial bedsharing can be.
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  • HyalineHyaline member

    Tons of great info here on safe bedsharing--Dr. McKenna is a professor at Notre Dame who studies mother/baby sleep behavior.  There is research and guidelines on his website.

    https://cosleeping.nd.edu/safe-co-sleeping-guidelines/ 

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  • MrsW101011MrsW101011 member

    Thanks everyone! So much great information!



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  • lynz797lynz797

    Try reading the book ....The Contented little baby book.

    It will help and benefit not only you but him as well, its all about getting them into a rountine and to help set there internal sleep cycles, and teaching them how to self soothe at times.

    :), works amazingly.......nothing worse than a sleep deprived momma 

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  • Juwels and SteveJuwels and Steve member
    I am not very familiar with the attachment parenting philosophy, but i think that whatever works best for you, your partner, and your child as a unit is the right thing to do. My daughter shared a room with us until she was about one month old (she slept through her nights starting at 2 weeks :) ) After that, when she would cry and not go back to sleep in her bed she would sleep in the middle of ours, wheather for 1 hour or the whole night, whatever made it so we could all sleep hapilly and wake up refreshed. at about 15 months old she did not want to sleep in her crib at all anymore and eveyone told us to just let her cry it out,.....yeah right. She would cry for hours on end and finally would throw up from it. Since she was pretty big and none of us had a good nights sleep when she slept in our bed, we set up her play pen at the foot of our bed where she happily slept and napped. I figured when she will be ready it will be easy. She is now 19 months old and we are awaiting our second baby in Jan, so we got her a "big girl bed" last weekend and so far she does not mind sleeping in her room. So, i guess the whole point of my story is: Go with your instincts,Try out different arrangements, and choose the path that most benefits your family. Only you know this and no one else can tell you what the "Best" thing is. I hope this helps you make a decision about what to do.
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