Community› The Bump Message Boards› Dads & Dads-to-be
Dads & Dads-to-be
New Discussion

REAL MEN STAND UP Part 1 "Douche Chronicles"

23marcus23marcus member
in Dads & Dads-to-be
Hey REAL DADS OUT THERE! (Sorry for this long post but i had to get this off my chest). This is vent that is directed at my douchs of a brother in law (wife's sister's husabnd). My sister in law and brother law started going out when they were 17, and weathered a lot of family issues. They got married in 2008 after 9 years of dating. 2 years later their first born arrived. My wife and I gave birth to our first 11 months later. 8 months after our first, they gave birth to their second, which they said was a mistake. Now here is where things get interesting. My brother in law is a narcisist who is extremely lazy and expects everything to be catered to him. My sister in law has and always been the bread winner. They never lived together until after they got married, because douche refused to get an apt with her but rather live with mommy until my sister in law manned up and bought a house. The 2 women in his life have always taken care of him. Between his mom and my sister in law, they have co-signed on student loans, personal loans, car notes, etc to help this so call man. There was always issues in their relationship but things made a turn for the worse after the first born arrived (although my wife and I believe it turned before they got married). He constantly would blame others for his issues. He would talk down to my sister in law and basically make her feel like she couldn't do better. She would bring home the paycheck, pay most of the bills, and still get no respect from the person that supposed to be her support system. So 6 months after their second was born, and after countless times to attempt to work on their relationship including multiple visits with a counselor, sister in law finally gave him his eviction notice. Now he has taken douchedom to an all time level. Instead of trying to work on his relationship and figure out what is wrong with the relationship, he decides to blame any and everyone who has any close contact with them. He moved back in with his parents. THe funniest, saddest, and most unbelievable comment that douche said to me was that he said "i know play a part in our issue, but its only 20% and 80% her!" I wanted to laugh and smack him atthe same time. what really makes me mad about the situation is now I have to pick up the slack for this douche. He seems to think by posting stuff on facebook saying things about your girls make you a dad. When really all you are looking for attention and people to give some type of warped justification for what they believe is you being a great dad! I will continue with story in a few days cus i can go on an on about this dude. I will need to give you the story in installments. Like i said in the title "REAL MEN STAND UP"
Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
Report Reply to Post

Re: REAL MEN STAND UP Part 1 "Douche Chronicles"

  • RockyTopVolsRockyTopVols member

    Sorry you are going through that man. My SIL is dating a loser right now too. He is 39.. lives with him mom, works a dead end job, and has no way of transportation. Granted, my SIL is pretty much the same except she is 32 so maybe they are made for each other ha. 

    Anyhow, hope it works out man and I feel for those two kids. It is going to be tough. Good to know you and your wife are being supportive. 

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • Loading the player...
  • ladyjenna13ladyjenna13 member

    And to think...I feel like a failure as a father if I get sick and want to call in sick.

    I think there is a huge difference between being a father biologically and being a provider and a father.

    I love being a provider and a father.  It is my calling in life, I am certain of it.

    Some boys never grow up into men. and if the women in his life have allowed this to slide over the years, it only helped create this man-child monster that you see now. Since he is grown, he needs to feel the pain of being alone and not having any future to kick start his ass.

    Sadly, sounds like mommy and daddy came in to save the day again for this clown, instead of taking the opportunity to teach this man a lesson in being a man.

    image

    Report Reply
  • ColtsdadColtsdad member
    I'm going to guess he is either an only child or "the baby" of the family.  It sounds like he was babied for way too long and now it'll take years after "cutting the cord" to get this guy on his feet because he's grown accustomed to having the women in his life do most of the work.  It is fairly amazing that this guy found a woman in the first place.
    Report Reply
  • ladyjenna13ladyjenna13 member

    imageColtsdad:
    I'm going to guess he is either an only child or "the baby" of the family.  It sounds like he was babied for way too long and now it'll take years after "cutting the cord" to get this guy on his feet because he's grown accustomed to having the women in his life do most of the work.  It is fairly amazing that this guy found a woman in the first place.

    I am an only child.  I have wanted to be on my own and provide for myself for as long as I can remember.

    A lot of parents are just enablers, regardless of how many kids they have.

    image

    Report Reply
  • onlymegganonlymeggan
    imageladyjenna13:

    imageColtsdad:
    I'm going to guess he is either an only child or "the baby" of the family.  It sounds like he was babied for way too long and now it'll take years after "cutting the cord" to get this guy on his feet because he's grown accustomed to having the women in his life do most of the work.  It is fairly amazing that this guy found a woman in the first place.

    I am an only child.  I have wanted to be on my own and provide for myself for as long as I can remember.

    A lot of parents are just enablers, regardless of how many kids they have.

     

    I'm not saying that ALL only children are this way by any means.  I know plenty of only children who are completely self sufficient.  I also know a few who their parent(s) smothered their child and they had issue being independent.

    I was not saying that either case automatically results in a person such as this, or even gives great odds, but it has been my personal observation that the few people that I've ran into in my days that expect everything done for them have typically fit one or the other categories.

     I do agree, there are enablers regardless of numbers of kids.  Some enablers are due to situations that occurred during their child's childhood, some enablers just can't help themselves.

    Warning No formatter is installed for the format bbhtml
    Report Reply
  • ColtsdadColtsdad member
    That last comment was mine, my wife left herself logged in.
    Report Reply
  • famous last wordsfamous last words
    My father was worse to my mom than that. I totally agree with you that real men stand up.
    Report Reply
  • ladyjenna13ladyjenna13 member
    imageonlymeggan:
    imageladyjenna13:

    imageColtsdad:
    I'm going to guess he is either an only child or "the baby" of the family.  It sounds like he was babied for way too long and now it'll take years after "cutting the cord" to get this guy on his feet because he's grown accustomed to having the women in his life do most of the work.  It is fairly amazing that this guy found a woman in the first place.

    I am an only child.  I have wanted to be on my own and provide for myself for as long as I can remember.

    A lot of parents are just enablers, regardless of how many kids they have.

     

    I'm not saying that ALL only children are this way by any means.  I know plenty of only children who are completely self sufficient.  I also know a few who their parent(s) smothered their child and they had issue being independent.

    I was not saying that either case automatically results in a person such as this, or even gives great odds, but it has been my personal observation that the few people that I've ran into in my days that expect everything done for them have typically fit one or the other categories.

     I do agree, there are enablers regardless of numbers of kids.  Some enablers are due to situations that occurred during their child's childhood, some enablers just can't help themselves.

    I hear you, dude.  Just had to stand up for all my only child peeps out there!Cool

    image

    Report Reply
This discussion has been closed.
Choose Another Board
Search Boards
"
"