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SD and doctor's appt

dawnm975dawnm975
in Blended Families
SD (15) has been going to a counselor for several years now.  She was having some suicidal thoughts and the counselor had her tested with a doctor.  The day of testing the doctor recommended that she be put on medication now and didn't want her to wait any longer.  DH and I had previously expressed our disapproval in her going on medication with the counselor.  The counselor would suggest SD to try certain things to help improve communication, etc, but SD isn't really willing to try these things.  It's so frustrating because things aren't going to improve for SD if she isn't willing to work on it.  So yesterday, DH, BM and SD went to her family doctor to disscuss her best option for medication and gave her a perscription.  DH asked about the side affects and also asked if nicotine affected it. BM went nuts and told DH to not even go there - to just shut up about the subject.  BM and her mom both smoke (live with SD and siblings).  The doctor nicely said that nicotine is never good for a child and should always be avoided; sure wish we could enforce that!  We hope the medication may help SD for right now and she will continue going to the counselor.  All this in itself is stressing me out, and to top it off BM has been on the band wagon of me "staying out of things because I'm not her mom".  BM called DH last week and really gave it to him.  DH just responded by saying of course I wasn't SD's mom, never said I was, but I am a parent in SD's life.  She didn't like hearing that, started yelling again and DH just hung up.  She even went so far as going to the doctor's office and taking my name off of the list for the doctor (have to be on the list to call for anything regarding SD).  Really - DH and I have been together since SD has been 4 and married for almost 10 - I'm not going anywhere!  I had brought SD to her doctor's appt (the first one) and BM aslo showed up, but I stayed in the waiting room while BM and SD went in.  A couple days later is when BM let DH have it.  I don't call BM, DH does, if I see her we make small talk, but that's about it.  Just don't understand where this is all coming from. 
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Re: SD and doctor's appt

  • NDSalesGirlNDSalesGirl
    Are you closer to SD than BM is? This happend with us after this summer. SS and I became close and he started calling me mommy. BM called once all summer and according to SS he wanted to call me mommy because I spent more time with him than his mom does. He still calls me after school to tell me about his day, which BM hates.
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  • Littlejen22Littlejen22 member
    She is depressed, I am not surprised she for not want to try. She needs meds. Hopefully the meds make her feel a little better and then she can try.
    Jen - Mom to two December 12 babies Nathaniel 12/12/06 and Addison 12/12/08
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  • FutureMrsWittigFutureMrsWittig member

    I'm glad you and your DH are keeping an open mind to the medication and I really hope it helps your SD feel better.

    And good for you for remaining the bigger person, keeping things civil between you and BM.  I know it's hard, but we all know it's what's best for the kids.

    Mama of 2: one who grew in my womb, both who grow in my heart.
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