Insert foot into mouth.
lorist202
member
I've done it again.
Let me set the scene: DH, who is the nicest guy ever, will talk your ear off. When he left for work, I saw his car pulled in front of our neighbor's house, who we are casually friendly with. Neighbor is a newly single dad of 3 and very busy, so I've noticed him actually avoid DH at times, just because he has no time to chat. (I have to laugh at this, because I tell DH all the time to leave the poor guy alone). DH pulls away.
Me: "Tell that man to get to work and earn some money already!" Smiling/ shaking head
Neighbor: "Well, that's how it works, right?"
My comment really meant- Tell that man you're busy and to be on his merry way!
Of course, the reason for neighbor's divorce is because wife was a SAHM who supported her own spending habit rather than paying the bills after 13 years of marriage.
I'll just leave the house in a large hat from here on in.
Re: Insert foot into mouth.
WOW! I can't believe he responded like that. He is on fire with bitterness. Im not saying its not justified but he needs to let it go for his own sake. And to think, you were trying to get your husband to quit talking to him for his benefit. I don't know...if somebody something as heavy as his divorce weighing on them, they are going to run into a lot of situations that stir emotions. But it's his choice how he responds and I really think he exercised poor judgment. A standard run of the mill polite answer would have been appropriate. He's got a lot of heavy ugliness inside and I don't know how you can help. Pray for him.
How did his comment sound bitter? I don't get it.
I don't think what OP said was wrong, at all.
I've been lurking here a bit lately, but felt the need to respond here because it made me laugh. Isn't it funny how things sound one way in your head but when you say them aloud people think something completely different? I wouldn't worry, your neighbor is probably just a bit sensitive right now.
I have similar situations all the time since I'm American but I live in England now and words/phrases have different meanings here. I have definitely said a few things that make people look at me like I have 10 heads. I usually don't get why until later when I realize that the word/phrase I used means something different here. DH points this out to me occasionally, but not until hours later when I cannot correct myself to the other person. Oh well, people will just have to think I'm crazy for a while until they get to know me.
You got all that from his response? LOL.
Our family blog
Based on the circumstances, I thought his comment sounded like he was bitterly saying "isn't that how it works? You want your DH to go to work and earn the money," (because that's what he did for so many years and his wife spent all the money on stuff for herself and betrayed him). I thought it sounded like he was bitterly projecting his situation onto the OP and I didn't think that was appropriate.
Whatever. Maybe I got it wrong. That's just how it struck me. It's not a big deal.
Yes, exactly. I thought he would just laugh. It's not a big deal, but I couldn't help but feel bad...