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October 2012 Moms
Mrs.G123
member
S/o working moms
Mrs.G123
member
Has being on mat leave changed your position on working or SAH? I have worked from home 3 days/worked in office 2 days since DD1 was born. This situation won't work anymore as I doubt I can WFH with two kids here. But putting two kids in full time childcare would wipe out my measly earnings. The problem is I feel super stir crazy already. Not sure where I am going with this but just curious if others have changed their views on working or SAH. I will likely just see what happens for three or four weeks when my leave us over in January.
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Re: S/o working moms
No. I have hated my job for over a year, and I still hate it. I know I like working though. My resolve remains the same to keep looking for a better fit once I get back. Until then do the bare minimum not to call attention to myself and get my annual bonus.
I also earn 48% of the household income. So if I quit that would be a major hit. We could afford it but we would be saving much less. We plan on re-evaluating after kid 2 (probably 3 years down the line). At that point, I may take off 1-2 years. Any more than that, research points to re-entry to the workforce being much more difficult at similar salary levels to when you left.
I wanted to stay at home from the beginning and still do. For the last 2 years I worked part time and still made the same amount as DH, but DH loves his job and has no desire to SAH. We cut our income in half but make enough and have enough saved that for now it's not an issue.
I do plan to work next summer for 4 weeks (summer school program) and my sister (she's in high school) will stay with me and watch the baby (we have no family around). Depending on how that goes and what our financial situation is then, I may go back to work PT...but then would have to find child care, so...we'll see.
With DS1 I cried, a lot, while on mat. leave because I really wanted to stay home, but we couldn't afford it. (I'm the breadwinner.) After 8 weeks, I went back to work. It was emotional, especially the first few days, but in the long run it turned out to be the right decision for us.
DS was very happy in daycare. He got to do so many more activities than he would have with me SAH, not to mention the interaction with other kids and other adults. I think it made the transitions to preschool and kindergarten so much easier on him. Also, he went through the constantly sick phase while 2 instead of when he started school.
With DS2, I'm not crying about not getting to SAH, but I do have to admit that I'm really wishing I could stay home with the two of them. I feel like I've grown so much as a mom, and it would be awesome to get to do things like go on field trips with DS1's class and take DS2 to play groups. But I'm ok with working too. I love my job. I know once I go back and we get into the swing of things it will be good. Just have to get there.
I would love to be with DS all the time to see him grow but I think I would go nuts being home every day, but that might change as DS gets older and doesn't just poop, sleep and eat.
I currently make more than DH and we have a few bills that we need to take care of before I could even think about SAH. I am going to go back full time so that I can get the bonus, profit sharing and hopefully a raise, then DH and I are going to save save save and try to kick out the few bills that we want to get rid of. At that point I think I will be able to stay home after about a year or 2. Thankfully, my parents are going to watch DS for the first year - 2 years so that we can get ahead and not have to pay the insane day care costs.
If only disability insurance would pay for us to raise our kids
you all know I am actively looking for a new opp but since having little one I became interested in part time roles I am truly looking for more work life balance 12 hour days will not cut it any more
I live less than 3 miles to work and willing to trade that for a commute that maybe 30 mins
After DS1 was born I went back to work part time, and it was perfect for our situation. He got some social interaction at daycare, and I got to keep up with my career while still being home with him 3-4days a week. Now with 2 kids, it doesn't pay for me to work anymore. I worked for a small family owned business, and I will probably help out a little during their busy season, but its npt worth it to go back even part time. We are planning on having a third, and part of me is thinking that it may be better to do it sooner rather than later, so as to limit the time I am not working.
So far I love being at home. The key for me is to stay busy and get out at least everyday so I don't go bat s*it crazy! Now that DS2 is 7weeks and starting to settle into more of a schedule, its a lot easier. I also joined a mom's group, and try to go to playdates once a week.
Definitely 100% changed my opinion. I thought I'd be ready to go back at 6 weeks, but I am on the verge of having a mental breakdown just thinking about it, and I get 8 now that I had to have a c-section.
I am considering desperate measures (short selling my house) in order to be able to be a SAH mom and raise my baby.