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Self Hitting to Deal with Frustration

LindaLamourLindaLamour
in Postpartum Depression
I have a very serious problem. I sometimes get so frustrated when LO cries that I take it out on myself by slapping myself in the face. I don't want her to end up learning my habits. No one else knows about this. I'm ashamed of my inability to cope.
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Re: Self Hitting to Deal with Frustration

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    RedRose87RedRose87
    I do this too... or if I am sitting against the wall at night I bang my head against it. I'm terrified of my little one learning this too, or of him feeling my frustration, and thinking I don't love him. I try to stop myself but I do it before I even realize it. Sadly i have a history of depression, anger issues, and self mutilation due to a history of abuse when i was a child/teen. You aren't alone in the self harm... I can't offer any advice but I can empathize.
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    katieh1017katieh1017 member

    I understand about not wanting LO to pick up on things that you do. I have been depressed, anxious most of my life. I really hope that L does not get that from me. But I have gotten help and if it should happen to her I know what to do.

    I think you should talk to someone about it. Now that you have a baby this would be a great time to get yourself well. I don't have any experience with what you are going through but I do know there is help available. I understand that you are feeling ashamed, embarressed and I have felt that way too. Even if you don't tell your friends/family, try to do something on your own. No one has to know your business. I hope things get better soon.

    Lillian April 17, 2012
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    marleysimonmarleysimon member
    My only advice is that when your husband is around and you feel your frustration escalating, take deep breaths and just tell your husband you're getting really frustrated and can he take her for a minute.  I find that my husband is much calmer than me and the crying doesn't get to him the same way.  And then when he is handling her and she's crying her head off, I'm able to jump in and help him and be the calm one.  I know that doesn't help for when you're are alone.  I've never experienced what you're doing, but I would think a professional could help you with other ways to release the frustration so it's not on the baby or you.  I became so frustrated yesterday at all the crying that I put the baby in her crib, turned on the mobile and walked away for a couple minutes.  It helped.  Best of luck! Oh, and she's a cutie!
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    wheelsonthebuswheelsonthebus member
    I was doing this too. It's so hard. Mine got better oncre my medication (prozac) kicked in. You aren't alone.

    Baby Birthday Ticker TickerBaby Birthday Ticker Ticker


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    emnoahmomemnoahmom member
    I do this too. I hit myself in the head, really hard, it's not good. I don't do it in front of the kids, but I feel the frustration so strongly I'm not sure what else to do. Sometimes I bite my arm, hard too. I hate it. I feel so completely out of control of my emotions at these points and as soon as I do these things I feel better. I'm in therapy and take medication and I still do this. Don't feel ashamed. I struggle with coping too. I mostly feel lost as if I can't quite find that "thing" to fix so I can stop this, but I am trying. I have no advice, just know you're not alone.
    Mom to Emma, Noah, Isaac, Asa, Asher, Jonah and expecting baby Alice 7/16


     



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