I don't even know what the proper term is, sorry if remains sounds harsh. I'm just very confused about what the proper thing is to do with the baby after I pass it. I'm not sure if at 8 weeks I'll identify it, but I think so, right? DH assumed that we just dispose(flush) but that is not sitting right with me. I looked up info last night at there was a Catholic site talking about burial or cremation. I'm very confused right now. I'm thinking I should call a funeral home and ask if they do cremations and maybe I can place the ashes by my father's grave. I just don't know what's appropriate.
Any advice or if you're up for sharing what you did, I'd appreciate any guidance. I scrolled back a few pages and didn't see a previous thread on this but if you have the link to one I'll look there. thank you.
*Siggy Warning*
About me 2007: Started TTC. 2008: OB prescribed clomid, went to RE and was Dx with PCOS. 2009: IUI #1 w/follitsim and trigger = BFP. B/G Twins born at 33 weeks. 2012: TTC #3, Round 2 of Letrozole w/TI = BFP, missed m/c at 8 1/2 wks. Currently on the bench as we make plans for a new home. Anxious to start TTC #3 within the next year!
Re: Sensitive Question - What to do with the remains?
Hi,
I'm sorry for your loss. I've recently transitioned to the TTCAL board but I'm glad I saw your post.
I think the proper term that the doctors use is "products of conception" though I have seen lots of women refer to the remains as their LO.
I was diagnosed MMC at 8 weeks and I passed her 2 weeks later. So by that point, she had shrunk down to the size of a 6 week old embryo. I couldn't identify anything, but I didn't really try.
I couldn't bare the thought of flushing her down the toilet. I saved her in a jar and then a few days later we cremated her in our back yard. It was hard to say goodbye to the last little bit of her that I had left to hold on to. But I'm glad we had a fire and did it that way because it at least felt ceremonious.
I didn't keep the ashes.
*Siggy Warning*
About me 2007: Started TTC. 2008: OB prescribed clomid, went to RE and was Dx with PCOS. 2009: IUI #1 w/follitsim and trigger = BFP. B/G Twins born at 33 weeks. 2012: TTC #3, Round 2 of Letrozole w/TI = BFP, missed m/c at 8 1/2 wks. Currently on the bench as we make plans for a new home. Anxious to start TTC #3 within the next year!
Wow that is very nice of them to do it at no charge. This is such an emotional time and its even harder when having to deal with bills for various services concerning it..... I hope you and DH can come to an agreement that you are both comfortable with....as much as you can be
Im so very sorry for your loss.
I havent even thought that far yet. I go in for my follow up on Monday so Im guessing I will get the babies remains then and figure it out. I like the cremation in the backyard thought though.
Married my very own GI Joe May 2002
I had to sign a form in the hospital before the d&c stating what I wanted to do. I, too, wish someone had prepared me for that question. I had the hospital handle the "products of conception," but I might have chosen another option if I had thought about it beforehand.
January PAL siggie challenge; Good advice: