POLL: Will your child's middle name have meaning?

SoleilMoon · November 2012

I LOVE that my DD's middle name is my grandmother's name (who passed while I was pregnant with her) and I plan to honor other family members with future kids, but I see a lot on here suggestions for middle names and always wonder why they don't honor someone in their family. So just curious, are you using a family member's name/initial/part of name for your child(ren)'s middle name?[Poll]

flerlgirl · November 2012

In our case, Michael is my father's name, DH's father's name, and subsequently DH's middle name. So Michael was an easy choice for us for a boy MN.

For a girl, the name Joy (as a MN) runs in DHs family, so while it isn't actually named after a specific family member, all the girls in his family have that middle name.

brighteyes2123 · November 2012

DS has two middle names for this reason. Andrew was my Dad's middle name and he passed away almost two years before DS was born. Paul came from DH and his Dad, because it's their middle name. I'm hoping that any other kids we have will have a double middle name, but I want them to mean something :]

mben1119 · November 2012

DS has my husband's name as his middle name.

EastCoastBride · November 2012

DS's middle name is my maiden name.

That being said, I don't feel a childs name HAS to honor someone. I know this is important to a lot of people, but it's not important to everyone. Neither my first or middle name is in honor of anyone - they were simply names my parents liked.

I see nothing wrong with this. Especially as I've seen even just from this board - trying to honor one person/side of the family brings in the whole "will so and so be hurt" issue and can create a lot of drama. Some people may just want to avoid that all together.

To each their own.

Elsa1984 · November 2012

I wasn't planning on it. She was actually supposed to have the middle name after a friend but towards the end of the pregnancy, I changed my mind and couldn't find a middle name I really liked. The week leading up to my induction, I ate a lot of cinnamon rolled that were from a homemade recipe from SO's deceased grandma. When my baby came out at 9lb 1oz I said she was chunky from those cinnamon rolls, and thus gave her the middle name after SO's grandma. He was really close to his grandma but I had never met her, so it was just a name to me. I didn't like the name "Vivian" but she was an important person to him, and those cinnamon rolls were important to me....hehe.

gutsymama · November 2012

I guess I don't see how picking a "random" name just because you like it is worse in the MN spot (which like PP said, no one really uses) than in the FN spot, which everybody uses all the time. Not that I would advocate for using a family name for a first name - if you want to use one in either spot, fine. If not, don't. It's no skin off my back one way or another about how other people choose to handle this.

We won't be using family names. Between the two families, there are 3 middle names that have been passed down, and while we like some of the people with these MNs, we hate all three of the names. DH's MN is one of them, and he even hates it, so why would we do that to our child? We also want to avoid family names for some of the other reasons mentioned above. The kid will have their genes, I think that's enough

benmel31 · November 2012

I couldn't vote. Either the first letter of the first name or middle name will honor a relative. It depends on the name we choose. One name combination that we are considering has both names honoring a relative.

It does not matter to me if it is the first or middle name, I just want at least one of the names to honor a family member.

gutsymama · November 2012

ramy3695:
DS's mn isn't after a family member, but it does have meaning to me and DH. We don't choose names that don't have any meaning to us.
If we ever have a girl, her mn will be my grandmother's fn who died from breast cancer. And if we have a second girl, her mn will be my other grandmother's fn.

This, also. There are lots of different ways a name can have meaning besides honoring a family member.

DawnJM25 · November 2012

We didn't name DD after a family member, but if our next one is a boy, we have a family name picked out. I guess we wanted to choose a name for DD since our boys have/will have family names.

baloneydisc · November 2012

DD's mn is my fn, but it's also my mom & MIL's mn so we were able to name her after 3 people with one name. If she had been a boy her mn would've been after DH's father.

jburdet1 · November 2012

DD'S mn, Louise, is a family name on my side. If we have a second DD we will use a family name from DH's side. However, if we happen to have a third DD we may have to resort to maiden names or just like names for the mn because we come up with blanks on who to honor after that. I think we're pretty good with boy family mns.

mkanderson85 · November 2012

My family does a saint's name for a middle name unless the first name is a saint's name. In that case, they skip the middle name.

MrsTBird · November 2012

DS' mn has family connections on both sides so it was an obvious choice for us. However, if we have another boy, I'm lost. It's mostly due to the family politics and me not wanting one side to feel left out. So I might do a variation of DH's name or dig way back into our family histories to find one. I'm not too excited about the latter, though, so I'm hoping DH will agree to a variation of his name.

If we ever have a girl, I'm set on her mn being after my grandma, who I was very close with. If we have two girls, then I'm lost again. But I'll cross that bridge when I get to it

g8trkim · November 2012

Grant's MN is Irving, which is after DH's grandfather. They were very close and he passed away when DH was in high school. From what I've been told, DH is very similar to him and when I talk to people who knew him they always have the kindest things to say.

Brynn's MN will be Lula, which was my great grandmother's name. We were also very close. I have always felt very connected to her, even after she passed away. She was a very big part of my childhood and I have really fond memories of her.

I love that our kids have MNs after our loved ones. But it bugs me when people use random family members names just because they feel like they should, rather than one with more meaning. I feel like it's just reaching. In that case I would just pick a name I like rather than grasping at some far off relative just because it's a "family name".

Jenny952 · November 2012

i voted No because DD's middle name isn't after a family member but she is named after someone (well 2 someone's). When DD was born, she was in the NICU for a week and we had to be separated while she went there and I was in recovery. I had a wonderful nurse in recovery who was with me while I was alone (DH went with DD). Then DD had an amazing nurse while she was in the NICU who really helped us. Both of those nurses had the same name so we used that name as DD's MN.

JaneDrewAK · November 2012

I voted no. My daughter has a middle name that flows well with her first and last name, and which we just happen to like.

Frankly, I don't see why there is so much snark on this board toward those of us who do not choose to "honor someone" with our child's middle name. It's like anyone who just wants a nice name gets the sideeye!

Not all of us come from families where that is a tradition. Not all of us have someone in our lives we'd like to honor. Many of us would like to avoid the drama that comes with naming after one inlaw or the other. Maybe some of us are not that sentimental. Whatever the reason, most of us are still going to choose a middle name, because that is our cultural norm, to give a first, middle, and last name.

TarHeels&Rebels · November 2012

Boys yes; girls no. Sexist, yep, but I'm sure the girls will thank me when I don't name them Laverne or Minnie

I even have an ancestor named Lettuce. So yeah, there just aren't good options in my family for women.

Notwifezilla7 · November 2012

I vote special snowflake.

For DD1, her MN is the same as mine, as is part of my mom's first name. (Ann)

For DD2, a good friend passed away not soon after I discovered I was PG. Her name was Kathie (Kathleen). We agreed we would use her FN as a middle name in the event baby #2 was a girl. My MIL shares this name and thinks it's for her. I let her think that.

For this pregnancy, in the event it's a girl, her first name means my late FIL's nickname. We took it as a sign that this is the name! The middle name will just be a name we both like.

In the baby is a boy, the middle name will be Joseph. It's both my father's first name and my late FIL's middle name.

Notwifezilla7 · November 2012

g8trkim:
Grant's MN is Irving, which is after DH's grandfather. They were very close and he passed away when DH was in high school. From what I've been told, DH is very similar to him and when I talk to people who knew him they always have the kindest things to say.

Brynn's MN will be Lula, which was my great grandmother's name. We were also very close. I have always felt very connected to her, even after she passed away. She was a very big part of my childhood and I have really fond memories of her.

I love that our kids have MNs after our loved ones. But it bugs me when people use random family members names just because they feel like they should, rather than one with more meaning. I feel like it's just reaching. In that case I would just pick a name I like rather than grasping at some far off relative just because it's a "family name".

I hate this too!!! Pick a name you like or to honor someone important to you, not some random great great aunt you never met, just to say it's a family name!!!

Notwifezilla7 · November 2012

TarHeels&Rebels:
Boys yes; girls no. Sexist, yep, but I'm sure the girls will thank me when I don't name them Laverne or Minnie I even have an ancestor named Lettuce. So yeah, there just aren't good options in my family for women.

Call me crazy, but I love Minnie! I just couldn't get over the Minnie Mouse comparision.

swimiz500 · November 2012

DD's mn is a combination of my grandmothers: Janet & Stella = Janelle.

If we have a boy next, his middle name will be Stanley after my dad and grandfather. If we have a girl, it will either be Lynn after my mom, or Nicolette after a very dear friend.

niche917 · November 2012

DS1's mn is DH's fn. (Jeffrey)
DS2's mn(s) are both my and DH's dad's fns. (Daniel Douglas)

Any future kids will have family mns as well.

All of DH's cousins have named their daughters with the same mn as his/their grandmother (Joy, which she goes by) but I don't like having everyone in the family have the same name as each other (there are four so far), we will be using her fn (Neva) as a mn if we ever have a girl.

If we have a second girl, we will use the mn Lynn, as that is my mn, my uncle's, MIL's, BFF's, and then there are quite a few women in my family that have "lyn" on the ends of their names (Marilyn, Evelyn, etc.) so it seems like a natural plan.

Strider003 · November 2012

I suppose I'm a SS. DS's mn is DH's mn. But honoring a family member or naming DS after one wasn't a deciding factor. It sounded the best and was the only one we really liked.
I thought about naming him after grandparents because myself and all of my siblings all share a mn with a grandparent. But really, I didn't feel like it was our 'place' to really get into family names since neither DH or I are firstborns. I realize that's not a requirementjust how I personally feel. Plus, both of our dads have awful mn's to stick a kid with, I don't like FIL's name, and my dad's name is a family name that was passed onto my brother who I am assuming will use it if he has a son.
I suppose I can see how it might be nice and maybe it'll happen with a future LO. But I don't think it's the most important thing when choosing a name.

sleepingbeauty825 · November 2012

One is, one is not.

ChariZae · November 2012

This LO's middle name will be after DH's late mother. For a future son, I would like to honor my late grandfather in someway. We hadn't formally discussed using family names as MNs, but it seems all the MNs we like honor family in someway.

BLPL101 · November 2012

Yes, Ruth is my DH's grandma's name. If we had a boy his middle name would have been Jacob, the same as DH's and his grandfather's name.

ETA: If we have another girl her middle name will be Katherine (after my grandma).

FrecklesInside · November 2012

Yes! Our chosen boy name has one of my brother's name as a MN, and the girl name has H's grandmother's name as the MN. I like the first name to be one that the parents just love, has some meaning to them maybe, and is special for that child (I don't like naming LO after someone in the FN spot). That said, I think that the MN spot should be used for something meaningful, as a tribute, or to pass a name down. It seems kind of pointless to give them a second name just because you liked that name too and it sounds good with the FN... makes the MN seem pointless IMO.

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