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Baby Showers
ggatlanta
member
Seriously witchy vent here. But if I see one more...
ggatlanta
member
in Baby Showers
I know, I know, what I am about to vent about is not a real problem. And I truly, truly don't mean to offend anyone, because I know that I am just being a you-know-what today. I deserve any flaming that I get. (To prove I mean no offense, some details have been changed to protect the innocent.)
But... next time I see a post complaining "MY BABY SHOWER IS TOO CLOSE TO MY DUE DATE!!!!! 
!!!!!", I am going to scream.
Not calling out anyone in particular - but today it's like Late Baby Shower Day. I read about one girl who was concerned that at 35+ weeks she'd be too uncomfortable to sit at her own baby shower for three hours. Apparently she is planning to remain standing for the following three to four weeks? Another MTB was asking for suggestions on what to pack in a bag for her late baby shower to keep "comfortable", for her shower MONTHS away - like four plus months. She cannot possibly know whether she will be uncomfortable in four months. Why worry now? Why borrow trouble? Ugh, maybe I am jealous because I wish my biggest and most pressing problem was my baby shower timing.
But even if jealousy is feeding my annoyance, I have to know: honestly, S+TMs, are we going to be that uncomfortable in the last month of our pregnancy? I mean, is sitting to watch a movie or attend a party really going to be unmanageable? Or am I crazy to think it's going to be un-fun but basically livable, right up until the end?
That's all. Feel free to tell me I am being unreasonable / too hard on people. I know I am. And if I hurt anyone's feelings, I'm truly sorry - I really don't mean to single out anyone in particular - I just hate the Late Baby Shower issue itself today. :-P
This discussion has been closed.
Re: Seriously witchy vent here. But if I see one more...
Really, I think that people way over think the timing of their showers. It is truly not that hard to sit, slap on a smile and enjoy the party. Unless you are in labor its very rarely "too late". I have been to showers at 38 weeks and 40 weeks.
LFAF Summer 2016 Awards:
I was out every night, it was the Jewish high holy days, for a week before my water broke. If you know anything about the Jewish high holy days, you spend a lot of time sitting at a table. I was fine. And, I was not a pleasant, glowy pregnant person... I was insanely uncomfortable and complained a lot. If I'm telling you you will be ok, you will be ok.
At almost 37 weeks I can tell you that not many positions are comfortable for any length of time. If I was having a shower at this point I would hope it was in someone's home or my own home so I could feel ok sitting, laying, reclining, or whatever position I needed to be in to be comfortable.
Honestly, everyone is different. Some women are still going all out exercising, and I know one person on my BMB who is still running several miles a day. They might have no physical issues having a late shower. But really you wont know until you get closer to that time.
No need to stress about it months in advance, IMO. And really the date is up to the host, it is what works for them. So there is no use in stressing or complaining. Either accept the shower or don't.
I have been getting pretty annoyed by them too. I feel like people should look at other posts before they go are the #1548895 poster on the same topic.
You might actually be really uncomfortable. You might be fine. There is no way to know ahead of time.
No flames here. It has been a popular topic across several boards today and yesterday. I don't get it either.
Yes, at 30 weeks with twins, I am uncomfortable. But my shower this past weekend was a nice distraction. What else would I be doing?
I thin the majority of the "worry" stems from being too uncomfortable to continue shopping after the showers because OMG, what if I have to return the crap that other people buy me so I can get my super-expensive diaper bag.
I had 4 showers and only 1 item to return - and that was my fault for putting the wrong item on my registry. I am keeping everything else because, just like my showers, they were GIFTS.
MelleTX, I think you are so sensible! And I love your nice manners. You are right, all that being worried about shopping and returns bothers me to death - and it bothers me more when people disquise it under a veil of "But by then I might not be comfortable!"
It really depends. With my first son I felt amazing until I was in labour. His shower was held two weeks before my due date. With my second son I was very uncomfortable and was in a lot of pain toward the end. I had bad back pain and sitting for a few hours at a time was hard some days. (as was standing or walking) MY sister's shower was held a couple weeks before I was due and I had to lie down for a while during the shower. (it was held where I was living so I easily just disappeared for a bit) I had trouble walking some days and nothing helped.
I don't think it's a huge deal to have a late shower but it can be pretty uncomfortable for some people. I'm not sure you'd konw so far ahead how you will feel. I wouldn't worry about it too much now.
EDIT I guess the people posting just assume things will be bad or they just want the shower sooner than later.
I think everyone has a different pregnancy experience and some people will be feeling very uncomfortable in the last month or two, and others not so much. I was still exercising the morning I had my son, and while I wasn't comfortable, I could have sat through a shower. I had a shower at 32 weeks and one at 36 weeks, and made it through both just fine.
I think what would have driven me crazy is if I was waiting to do my shopping/nursery setup until after the shower. I had the nesting bug pretty bad and I would have gone insane waiting that long to get everything ready. However, both of my showers were surprises, so DH and I had already purchased and set up all the necessities.
I think people that have late showers just need to plan to do all of their shopping for the essentials (car seat, stroller, place for baby to sleep, initial supply of diapers/wipes, etc.) early on when they're feeling good and can run around town looking for bargains. Leave the "nice to have" or items for older babies on the registry, and worry later about shopping for those items or making exchanges.
BUT - when it's a "I'd rather have it earlier - can I request that?", sure. Why not? It's when it's basically thenm having a temper tantrum over it that I roll my eyes.
~Benjamin Franklin
DS dx with celiac disease 5/28/10
Cautiously expecting our second little petri dish baby - stick, Baby, stick!
I was 35 weeks. Baby was born 3 weeks later. I somehow managed to set things organized and set up and OMG work and then give birth, all in a timely manner.
This. Are these people planning on doing absolutely nothing the last few weeks or pregnancy? I'm a FTM so cleary I am not in the know, but I think the "uncomfortable" factor is just an excuse.
I'm one of the guilty ones. . . I posted a question about shower timing on the multiples board a few days ago. My SIL wants to throw me a shower, and she thought that 33 weeks would be a good time. I'm not concerned about being comfortable, but I am concerned about pre-term labor, bedrest, pre-e, and all the other possibilties that become higher risk with multiples. I am also concerned that if I have complications, I might not have time after my shower to get things washed and put away. . . and I'm definitely worried about how much time I'll have to do anything once my twins come!
I certainly won't throw a fit if she won't consider an earlier date, but I will definitely plan on buying more things myself prior to the shower so that I can have as much as possible ready early just in case I have any problems.
This.
I had my work shower at 36 weeks. I worked until two days before I was induced. YMMV, but I felt better in the last month of my pregnancy than I had in the first eight months (morning sickness was rough!). I could see not wanting a shower in the last four weeks of pregnancy if it requires any sort of travel, but otherwise, it's really not that big of a deal...unless you're counting on friends and family to buy all your big ticket items. If that's the case, you may need to reassess a few things!
Married Bio * BFP Charts
I recently post today about how late was too late to have a shower. I wasn't thinking of being uncomfortable but more unorganized. I'm a planner, I will be moving in Jan. so I know having a lot going on can be stressful for me. I was told not to buy anything until after my shower, after reading a few post I've decided to buy the essentials as I planned on doing before I was told not to. I will keep it to myself.. lol
Many working moms work up until the day they deliver - I did with DS. So, how is it that so many working moms sit at a desk for 8 hours a day those final weeks of pregnancy, but so many women seem to think if it is during their several weeks of their pregnancy they cannot socialize, sit, and stand for three hours at an event where people are showering them with gifts for their baby?
Just a thought.
I'm usually perplexed with how these ladies got to the point of having such late showers. Maybe I'm the exception, but the hostess for my shower called and asked me what dates would be best for me (since, I had to be available and all). Personally, I wanted an earlier shower because I'm due on Christmas Eve, and it seems like most of my Saturdays in December are usually spoken for (Christmas shopping, Christmas parties, etc.). Also, I thought that the same might be true for my guests, and didn't want to add another event to an already busy time. So, we decided on late October instead. Perfect. If they really don't want a late shower for whatever reason, why didn't they just speak up about it? It might not always work out, but it's better than complaining about a gift after the fact.
I must have had easy and comfortable pregnancies as well. For my first I worked (office - so sitting 2 hours at a time until a break) until the day before delivery. For my second I was canning (as in greenbeans until really late at night...the day before delivery. For my 3rd I walked about 30 blocks (it seemed) at the Ann Arbor Art Fair in Michigan. I was 39 weeks at the time...and that baby weighed in at 9.7 lbs. Unless you have a really serious health issue I don't think people are all that uncomfortable. It is OK to say we are uncomfortable (gets some sympathy from people) but in reality it is not all that uncomfortable. At a shower the MTB is up and down several times. I would suggest not to sit in a big lounge chair since it is harder to get out of.
I couldn't imagine just laying around the last couple weeks of a pregnancy...maybe that is what some of the FTM's think it will be like. I actually had the most energy the last month of pregnancy.
This! I know plenty of working moms who are up and on their feet all day too. I don't sit for more than my half hour lunch break at work, I can handle a baby shower I think