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Secondary IF
New here...a little about me -.
Hello,
My name is Melissa and my husband and I have been trying for our second child for 3 years this month. We have a 4 year old son and he is the light of our lives...but I feel that something is still missing and our family is not complete yet. Trying for 3 years has been exhausting, emotional, depressing - all the emotions I'm sure everyone is having. We just did our first IUI and it did not work. I have PCOS, a partially blocked tube, a bicornualte uterus (heart shaped) and possibly endometriosis. My RE wants to be more aggressive with injections and IUI, but insurance doesn't cover it, so I'm not sure we'll be able to pay that much - which is hard to accept as well...the emotional part of me says spend as much as it takes, but the practical part just knows that is not smart! It's hard because I feel like just about everyone else that I know gets pregnant just by looking at their husbands. I'm not ready to give up on my dream of completing my family but so many people tell me I should be happy I have one child. I do understand that to a point...I get to experience all the joys of having a child, but yet something is missing and that desire to have another child is just as strong as it was when I was trying for my son.
It took me awhile with my first as well...I got pregnant the first month of trying only to have that end in a miscarriage at 5 weeks. Then it took exactly one year from my m/c for us to get pregnant with my DS.
I just wish it could be easy to get pregnant like so many people I know. My cousin just told me tonight that she is 9 weeks pregnant (after 3 months of trying)- while I'm super happy and excited for her, I'm so sad for me.
I just really want my DS to have a sibling!! I know that he would be such a good big brother and that it would be so great to have two kids. I try to be positive and try to spin it that its good I haven't had one yet..."get to enjoy my son more" "only have to pay for one kid in daycare" "my son gets all our attention" the list goes on and on, but I'm just trying to understand why God is not answering my prayers. I really hope he has a plan for me cause I don't understand it!
Anyway...sorry for going on and on...I just am so happy that there are people out there who are going through the same thing as me!
Thanks for reading!
This discussion has been closed.
Re: New here...a little about me -.
Hello and welcome!
I hope your stay is short... Getting to the three year mark is tough! Good luck!
BFP 1/21/13, blighted ovum m/c 2/12/13
Welcome! I am new to the board myself. I could have written your post myself, I feel exactly the same way thinking of the positives of having one child, my desire to have another child for my daughter (she will be 4 in Jan). I myself have a sister and we are 7 years apart, we have never been close, even now she lives in Alaska. I always wanted to have a big family for myself so that my children would have each other and not feel alone in life and I am devastated I cannot provide that for her. We have been TTC since our DD was 9 months old and have discovered we have MFI and she was a miracle to begin with. I am currently going thru my 1st IVF/ICSI cycle since this is our only option.
I feel sad for myself when everyone around me has 2-3 kids and I feel everyone is pregnant but me. I just got a call yesterday from a friend she is 6 weeks with her first, it took her 3 months. There must be a bigger plan for all of us. GL!
Dx: PCOS and short luteal phase
18 cycles (3 with our RE) - Metformin + Clomid + HCG booster did the trick!
BFP #1 6/22/09 EDD: 3/2/10 DS born: 3/8/10
TTC #2 since Dec 2011
BFP #2 7/8/12 EDD: 3/18/12 M/C @ 9w1d: 8/16/12
Thanks Ladies! It's so great to know that other people are going through the same emotions as me. So nice to know that I'm not the only one dealing with IF after having a child already.