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Just don't get it

jazzerbabe28jazzerbabe28 member
in Secondary IF
Today at lunch a friend of mine asked me how I was doing with my IF treatments. Then she said well maybe god has a plan for you and wants to make sure you are ready for another baby. Really? Shouldn't the decision of when I'm ready to have another baby be up to me and my spouse? This one little sentence just killed me. Why are people so insensitive. Thanks for letting me vent...
Jazzerbabe Mom to DS Jacob 11/09/2007 TTC since October 2009 BFP 11/18/2012 M/C 01/30/2013
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Re: Just don't get it

  • AprilDrew04AprilDrew04 member

    I think she got the first part correct "God has a plan for you"  I tell myself this everyday.  But it has nothing to do with whether or not you are "truly ready" for another child.  I'm pretty sure we were ready the minute we started ttc again. 

    It's so hard to deal with others who can't truly have an understanding of what we are going through.  It would be so easy to counter her with some example of someone who wasn't ready to have a child or another child...asking her why she thinks God felt they should have a child and not you.  However, I'm sure you did what we all try to do - take a deep breath and say nothing.

    Hang in there...someday, hopefully soon, you will see what God's plan for you is.

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    DD conceived after 3 years of ttc.
    MFI - DH had varicocele repair and took Clomid to get DD b. 02/2010

    TTC #2 since 6/2010
    10/2012 DH diagnosed with Epilepsy
    A few failed IUIs summer 2012 and 2013. 
    DH taking clomid and waiting to see if he needs another vericocele repair. 
    Hoping for a 2015 baby or babies. 
    Wishing, hoping, waiting.


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  • SigmundsGirlSigmundsGirl

    I'm so sorry she was insensitive. My neighbor told me that "God has a plan" right after we lost our baby. Her intentions were good, but not what I wanted or needed to hear. Sometimes the best thing people can do is say nothing.

    Hugs!

    Dx: PCOS and short luteal phase
    18 cycles (3 with our RE) - Metformin + Clomid + HCG booster did the trick!
    BFP #1 6/22/09 EDD: 3/2/10 DS born: 3/8/10

    TTC #2 since Dec 2011
    BFP #2 7/8/12 EDD: 3/18/12 M/C @ 9w1d: 8/16/12

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  • 74dragonfly74dragonfly member
    I'm sorry. That was insensitive of your friend.




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  • jazzerbabe28jazzerbabe28 member
    Thanks everyone! I am just super sensitive right now. I think she meant well just didn't realize how IF affects me.
    Jazzerbabe Mom to DS Jacob 11/09/2007 TTC since October 2009 BFP 11/18/2012 M/C 01/30/2013
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