Issue with DD's pre-school, really need advice! — The Bump
Pre-School

Issue with DD's pre-school, really need advice!

Tonight, DD told us something disturbing about her school director. Iits a small-ish school and he's usually very involved with kids during the day, when they eat lunch, when they go outside, etc. DD said that during lunch, one of the boys in her class was eating an apple and threw up his soup (and some of it got on her). The director apparently came up to him and smacked him on his forehead and said he'd go back to the 3-year-old class; the boy cried. DH and I were appalled, but confused. I mean, she's four, and she gets her stories mixed up still (just last week, it took us 15 minutes to try to figure out why she was in time-out, and we still couldn't), but a 4-year-old knows when somebody hits a kid and the kid cries, right? Is there anything she could be misinterpreting? I'm planning to call a mom I know from school and ask if either of her kids has ever said anything about the director (her second child is in this school now). And I'm really wanting to talk to the director and call him out on this. What would you do? Talk to him, drop it, pull DD out of the school entirely? I have to add, we've been very happy with this school up till this point.

Re: Issue with DD's pre-school, really need advice!

  • OK, from the first read I automatically think the kid choked on an apple and he was smacked on the back, but maybe the other hand was supporting him? And throwing up was coughing out the apple which landed in the soup and splashed, and maybe the "three yr old class" was him directing a staff member to get the nurse from the 3-yr old class?

    I would definitely call the director and explain DD was upset and had this experience it and didn't know how to process, could he please shed some light so you can explain it to her.  You are concerned she misunderstood the sequence of events and that she may be afraid of him.  I'd start off innocent, and if you aren't satisfied, decide where to go?

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  • ^^^

    This is more or less what I was thinking as well.

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  • Um, not nice to tell someone to "calm down" it's condesending to say that.

    Yuliya, my 3.5 year old tells tales and gets confused easily. Usually if I am concerned I talk with the teacher or the director. Maybe the next time you see him just ask him what happened. I would say your daughter probably did see him "hit" the child but it might not be what she think (i.e. he was in trouble) but something complete benign.

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  • imageLillyGrrl:

    Um, not nice to tell someone to "calm down" it's condesending to say that.

    Yuliya, my 3.5 year old tells tales and gets confused easily. Usually if I am concerned I talk with the teacher or the director. Maybe the next time you see him just ask him what happened. I would say your daughter probably did see him "hit" the child but it might not be what she think (i.e. he was in trouble) but something complete benign.

    Thanks, though, I don't know that the pp was saying it in that way, you know. In any case, I do realize that this might be an overreaction on our part, but it sounded like he was angry with the kid for throwing up (spitting the apple out instead of eating?) and hit him. But you're right, sometimes it's hard to get her stories straight, she is four, after all.

    Thanks for your input, ladies. I will try to talk to him either today when I go to pick her up or tomorrow morning. 

  • Just wanted to say thanks again. I did talk to the director this morning and he told me what had happened. The kid did throw up, and was crying, the director moves all the other kids to another table to finish their lunch, and was taking the dirty shirt of the boy, and, I guess, accidentally hit his head. So relieved. Though I'm glad I did talk to him. Thanks again!!
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