Waiting to Adopt Check-in 10/22

jillianmb · October 2012

This is a place for anyone in the waiting-to-adopt phase to check in. Lurkers welcome! Whether you're still checking out different agencies and programs or you're bringing your child home tomorrow, this is for you!

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?

2) In what phase of the process are you?

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?

4) How are you feeling this week?

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

OKitty · October 2012

Aaahhh, because I'm anxiously waiting to leave for our interview...

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? DIA

2) In what phase of the process are you? Still interviewing. Need to find out if this agency is going to allow us to move forward or not. If not, back to square one of finding another agency.

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? It's finally Oct! We've been waiting since July for this interview.

4) How are you feeling this week? "is this really happening?" it all seems surreal

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain. No. Hardly anyone asks. Most people seem to congratulate us on the impending biological child we will have once we adopt (insert sarcasm). I'd like to help them take a step...off a cliff. Thanks for letting me vent!

DaisyZH · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?

Adoption from foster care, 0-2 or 3

2) In what phase of the process are you?

We are going to be starting our classes in January : )
3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?

I spoke with my county and gave them our information, received my foster care handbook and we will be taking the January session of certification classes.

4) How are you feeling this week?

Nervous!

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

The only people that know right now are our mothers and my best friend, so we really don't get asked. I kind of wish my mom would ask me, or at least want to talk about it a little more when I bring it up but maybe it's because we're so early in the process.

jillianmb · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? International / Russia / 2 yo boy

2) In what phase of the process are you? 4 weeks away from bringing him home. Oh.my!!

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? DH and I went to target this weekend and bought a bunch of stuff for our final trip like an umbrella stroller and smalls toys to pack. Ahhhhhhh I get butterflies just thinking about bringing him home! So excited!

4) How are you feeling this week? Basically beside myself with excitement. I'm even excited to meet our pediatrician tonight! Let my lame mom life begin.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain. I almost always like it. Every once and a while when things were slow I got tired of being asked, but really 95% of the time I appreciated it and liked to talk about the process. DH was the opposite. He really does not like to talk about it because he is the kind of person who just likes to keep busy and not think about it so time goes by faster. Luckily people tend to ask me about it more than him.

Mush-Tastic · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? Newborn infant domestic

2) In what phase of the process are you? We will be done with our home study 2 weeks from TODAY!

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? Well...we survived our drama from this weekend without too much aftermath. If you don't know what I'm talking about, see my previous post from Friday.

4) How are you feeling this week?Totally weird after this weekend's drama with a potential set of birth parents and then extended family choosing to parent the baby.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain. I appreciate people's intentions and that they care. However often times I don't have much to offer at the moment and it's going to get really old hearing about this for however long. It's especially hard when you have situations arise that seem so crazy that people like to offer their uneducated opinions and you have to sit and try and educate them while trying to process in your head the situation you find yourself in. Frustrating at times, but yet you can't fault others for being curious or caring!

ycristina84 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?Newborn infant domestic
2) In what phase of the process are you? We are researching different agencies and interviewing with them. We have narrowed it down to two, but things may change if my husband gets this job in L.A. We can't move forward till we know if we have to move!
3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?Just the fact that I am REJOICING in no more medical interventions and being 100% sure this is our path to parenthood feels simply perfect at the moment and worth celebrating. 4) How are you feeling this week?Positive, overwhelmed, excited, at peace.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

So far we have only told a handful of people mainly because we know that with infertility people were driving us nuts with questions...People are really interested in our sex life I guess. But, we are having to educate people on what an arduous and long process this can be, since most people really have no clue what adoption entails. So they ask if we are "waiting" on a list, and we have to explain that we aren't there yet and we won't be till we have about 20-30k and an agency picked.

raecheleblue1 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? DIA

2) In what phase of the process are you? We are matched with an emom who is due in 3 weeks!

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? We packed all of the baby gear this weekend that we will be taking with us so it is all ready to go should we need to leave quickly.

4) How are you feeling this week? ANXIOUS! So anxious! We leave in less than 2 weeks to go to the state the baby will be born in and I just feel like time is going soooooooooooo slow. We don't know a lot of the details either that would be nice to know, so the unknown of how this is all going to happen has us nervous.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain. Eh, it depends on who is asking and on the day and my mood. My family is asking questions about it every time I talk to them, mostly I'm sure because they are excited and anxious too. Sometimes though I get frustrated with all of the questions because we just don't know a lot and can't share anything new with them. I wish that wasn't the case and I wish we had all of the answers, but we don't and I just need to remember that it will all happen according to God's plan, and pray that we have the same plan.

erinmc1 · October 2012

jillianmb:
This is a place for anyone in the waiting-to-adopt phase to check in. Lurkers welcome! Whether you're still checking out different agencies and programs or you're bringing your child home tomorrow, this is for you!
1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?
Agency assisted domestic infant
2) In what phase of the process are you?
waiting 11 months yesterday
3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?
nothing at all. feeling very discouraged by the lack of overall placements lately at my agency
4) How are you feeling this week?
a little resigned
5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.
See above. We've had 5 potential matching calls, and all have been placed with other families or decided to parent, but 3 of those came in the first 3 months of the wait. Our agency said we have, if not the best letter, one of the top 2 they have. They're closing the program to new families until some of us are matched. If other families were matching, we would probably rewrite our letter or try SOMETHING new, but agency-wide they've only had 1 placement in 3 months, when they usually have about 2/month. So there's nothing new, ever.
So yea, not too many people ask anymore. They know we'd say if anything changed. People who just find out we're adopting assume it's exciting, but this part at least, is not. It's a few peaks and valleys, and a lot of feeling stagnant.

kimmyb1020 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?

International/China/under 2

2) In what phase of the process are you?

Hoping to have our application to our agency turned in this week.

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?

Currently starting to tell people, which is really exciting! We were going to wait on telling friends and extended family, but since we need 6 non-family references we figured we might as well tell everyone!

4) How are you feeling this week?

There's been a few ups and downs with telling people and it's a little more emotionally exhausting than I anticipated, but I'm loving it. I felt like I couldn't tell anyone about our infertility struggles, but for some reason I want to tell everyone about adoption! We are also thinking about starting a blog. Turns out coming up for a name for the blog was harder than deciding to adopt

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

I think I will enjoy it. I want our family and friends to feel a part of the process.

Ginger71 · October 2012

jillianmb:

This is a place for anyone in the waiting-to-adopt phase to check in. Lurkers welcome! Whether you're still checking out different agencies and programs or you're bringing your child home tomorrow, this is for you!

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? Domestic infant

2) In what phase of the process are you? waiting

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? no

4) How are you feeling this week? A little discouraged. We have been HS approved for 5 months and our profile has not even been shown. Last week we opened up to all states just to try to get some opportunity calls but we probably can't afford the extra expenses for most states.
5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

Most people don't know but when those that do ask I just say "we haven't heard a thing yet" When it gets awkward and they don't know what to say I just tell them I'm fine with waiting and our baby will find us but I don't feel like that every day......I guess that is why we didn't tell too many people...just close family and close friends.

orange1414 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? DIA

2) In what phase of the process are you? Waiting to be matched

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? Nope.

4) How are you feeling this week? Like it's never going to happen.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

I didn't mind when we were still working on our home study, but now that we're just waiting, it bugs me. There is no forward progress at this stage--either we're matched or we're not. I've told everyone that if we get matched, I will let them know, so there's really no point in check in about adoption otherwise.

missred75 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?

Domestic infant adoption

2) In what phase of the process are you?

Waiting for a match

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?

We got contacted by an EM this past week.

4) How are you feeling this week?

Nervous, hopeful, scared, etc., etc., etc.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

I don't get tired of it. Anyone that asks is really just hoping for good things for us, and I know that it comes from caring about us.

bumpuser794640 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? : domestic infant adoption

2) In what phase of the process are you? : saving, waiting to apply to agency!

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?: 33% of our savings is in place! We also found out that DH got a pay increase, so we should reach our savings goal about 7 months earlier than we originally thought.

4) How are you feeling this week?: Pretty good, but also insanely jealous of my friend who just gave birth last night (they got KU on cycle #1 off BCP, of course)

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.: I love it when people ask me how things are going, even though we haven't made any real "progress" in the process so far. I like that they care enough to ask and let me know they're thinking of us and praying for us.

Allie-Jo · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing?

DIA

2) In what phase of the process are you?

Finishing up the homestudy process. We have one more training to do, a visit tomorrow and on the 30th, SW will take about a week to write everything up, then we will be "waiting"!

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?

Not unless you count not going clinically insane in preperation for our first home visit! This next visit is at the agency, so I feel a bit more calmer, but that last run-through on the 30th...may go crazy right before.

4) How are you feeling this week?

Kinda anxious, but ok I suppose. I have a friend-of-a-friend who is with the same agency as we are, she has gone through 2 failed matches and has been waiting almost 2 years. The night of our suppose-to-be meeting our SW called to reschedule, found out later it was because there was an emergency placement that afternoon/night and it was HER! I don't know why but hearing about her placement makes me far less anxious about never coming out the other side of this.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

Right now, I'm ok with almost everyone asking. I know there are 2 people at work who ask almost once a week, and it's only because they want something to talk about, everyone else seems to ask with good intentions (and not every week) so I don't mind updating them.

Blsd4given · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?

Foster-to-Adopt, Adoption from Foster Care - 0 to 6... That's the current plan. But Russia peaks my interest too. I think we're just waiting for God to show us the way to go.

2) In what phase of the process are you?

Waiting for licensing and placements

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?

Nope

4) How are you feeling this week?

Ehh... It varies from moment to moment. I'm really wrestling with God lately. Lots of drastic highs and lows.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

People don't really ask. Only our immediate families know. And they know what's holding us back too. So, they know the answer before asking.

smithpaint · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?

International adoption from Russia. Age 3 or under

2) In what phase of the process are you?

Very beginning stage - researching, saving $.

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?

No

4) How are you feeling this week?

I am excited and hopeful at this point (which isn't saying much because we haven't really started the process). We have found the agency that we would like to use. Plan on meeting with them next month and asking any/all questions we have.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

We haven't talked to anyone about it yet. Too early in the game.

fledgegrl1 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? DIA

2) In what phase of the process are you? Home study in progress, and working on the profile.

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? We had our first visit last week, and will have another meeting with social worker this Wednesday.

4) How are you feeling this week? Grateful - b/c we're meeting at the SW's office this week, so I don't have to sweep up the dog fur tumbleweeds. And stressed - b/c I'm spending WAY too much time reading everything about adoptions (fun!) and not enough time working on my dissertation (not fun!).

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain. Eh, it really depends on my mood, I guess. It's really only a select few folks who know, and they only ask out of excitement and support for us, so I'm usually okay with it.

[Deleted User] · October 2012

The user and all related content has been deleted.

ruthie7532 · October 2012

jillianmb:
1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?
Domestic, agency assisted. We are open up to age 2, but our agency mostly does infant adoptions.
2) In what phase of the process are you?
Our SW will be done with our home study report on Thursday, or maybe earlier, and then we'll be just officially waiting.
3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?
Just thrilled to be done with all the paperwork.
4) How are you feeling this week?
Expectant, peaceful.
5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.
Mostly I don't mind. There are a couple of people that are a little annoying, but for the most part, I know people are just really excited for us.

jillianmb · October 2012

GnomeSweetGnome:
3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?: 33% of our savings is in place! We also found out that DH got a pay increase, so we should reach our savings goal about 7 months earlier than we originally thought.

Wow that is AWESOME! 7 months is huge!!

jmoka7 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? Foster to adopt ages 2 months to 9 years old 2) In what phase of the process are you? I have my first placement; two brothers age 13 months and 2.5 years old 3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?I've lost 5 pounds since I've had the boys (three weeks)! 4) How are you feeling this week?I feel like a bad mother; like I'm always disciplining when I should be having more fun with them. I just feel like maybe I'm not doing it right.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

In this situation, I don't like being asked about the boys situation. 9 times out of 10 it's nosey people who I've already explained that I can't tell them why the boys are in foster care. I did have someone at the daycare ask if I was going to adopt them and I actually smiled inside when she asked. But I'm pretty sure the boys will be place back with their parents or family at some point.

lizlemon2 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? Adoption from foster care; 1 0r 2 children under age 5

2) In what phase of the process are you? Approved and waiting

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? Went to our first adoption party and were also called about possibly taking a 3.5 yo girl who is legally free for adoption

4) How are you feeling this week?Starting to be positive again

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain. I don't mind when they ask. It means they are interested.

IRR · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? DIA

2) In what phase of the process are you? 7 weeks until EM is suppose to deliver

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? Painted the nursery this weekend and bought a super cute area rug for the room. Had the first round of my chicken pox vaccine and the TDAP shot.

4) How are you feeling this week? Frustrated that no one returns phone calls or keeps appointments when I am trying to find out what is going on with the EM. Was told she has gestational diabetes and had a bunch of dr. appts but no one told me how they went.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

I am ok with questions on most days, but on the days the "drama" is in full gear I don't really want to talk about it with anyone because it just pisses me off. It's not their fault, but sometimes I would rather not be questioned so I don't have to give the latest update. Only close friends and family even know we are adopting. We figured once the TPR's are signed then we will let the world know.

bumpuser794640 · October 2012

jillianmb:
GnomeSweetGnome:
3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?: 33% of our savings is in place! We also found out that DH got a pay increase, so we should reach our savings goal about 7 months earlier than we originally thought.
Wow that is AWESOME! 7 months is huge!!

I know, right?! It was a total God thing - we didn't even know a pay increase was happening. I love all the little signs that we're moving in the direction He has planned for us.

msditz00 · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? We are adopting from DCF, hoping to be matched with two (possibly three) siblings somewhere around the age of 6 and under. Until then we are open for respite care.

2) In what phase of the process are you? LICENSED!!!

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? We found out we are licensed on Oct 11 - which has sentimental value because we found out I was pregnant with our first son on Oct 11 3 years ago!

4) How are you feeling this week? Optimistic.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain. I like it, and wish our family would do it more often. My mom is randomly helpful/interested with adoption stuff. Which is a huge improvement from when we first told them - we had my mom, dad, sister, and brother in law in the car and not one of them said a word. NOT.A.WORD. Talk about awkward. I just wish she would be a bit more interested.

lizlemon2 · October 2012

msditz00:
1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages? We are adopting from DCF, hoping to be matched with two (possibly three) siblings somewhere around the age of 6 and under. Until then we are open for respite care.

2) In what phase of the process are you? LICENSED!!!

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate? We found out we are licensed on Oct 11 - which has sentimental value because we found out I was pregnant with our first son on Oct 11 3 years ago!

4) How are you feeling this week? Optimistic.
5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain. I like it, and wish our family would do it more often. My mom is randomly helpful/interested with adoption stuff. Which is a huge improvement from when we first told them - we had my mom, dad, sister, and brother in law in the car and not one of them said a word. NOT.A.WORD. Talk about awkward. I just wish she would be a bit more interested.

MS ditz: Looks like we are in a similar boat!

ellekae · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?

We're in limbo. We were DIA, but that's on hold. Debating our international options right now... Heart set on China, but money is not our friend on that front.

2) In what phase of the process are you?

Calculating what we have to do in order to get our net worth up to the required level (for China) and fundraising our bums off.

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?

Got myself out of the despairing funk that defined the last three weeks. If God says, "wait," then I'm going to be the most proactive wait-er ever.

4) How are you feeling this week?

Impatient, but contentment is right around the corner. I can feel it coming.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.
I love it. I wish people would ask more. There is so much ignorance out there about adoption and the process. I love to talk about what we're doing and what the process entails... and I'll love it even more when my answer can be more specific than "I have no idea." Ha!

reallifewithkids · October 2012

1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?

In 2 processes - DIA and Fost-Adopt

2) In what phase of the process are you?

We have been approved and waiting since April 20, 2012 for DIA and we are 6 classes into a weekly 13 class Foster Parenting program. If all goes well we'll be licensed to foster by January 2013

3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?

Almost to the halfway point for our foster care classes - just hit 6 months waiting in DIA program.

4) How are you feeling this week?

Had a super tough week last week - I suck at not having control over stuff. Feeling better about God having a plan this week. Trying to focus on how far we've come rather than that we aren't there yet.

5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.

I like it when people ask - mostly because it makes it feel real. That's also why I like going to the monthly DIA prepare classes at the agency - it makes it feel real that we are on this journey.

jillianmb · October 2012

reallifewithkids:
1) What kind of adoption/fostering are you doing? Ages?
In 2 processes - DIA and Fost-Adopt
2) In what phase of the process are you?
We have been approved and waiting since April 20, 2012 for DIA and we are 6 classes into a weekly 13 class Foster Parenting program. If all goes well we'll be licensed to foster by January 2013
3) Any recent accomplishments or milestones to celebrate?
Almost to the halfway point for our foster care classes - just hit 6 months waiting in DIA program.
4) How are you feeling this week?
Had a super tough week last week - I suck at not having control over stuff. Feeling better about God having a plan this week. Trying to focus on how far we've come rather than that we aren't there yet.
5) QOTW: Do you like it when people ask you, "Hows the adoption process going?" Do you get tired of being asked? Does it depend? Explain.
I like it when people ask - mostly because it makes it feel real. That's also why I like going to the monthly DIA prepare classes at the agency - it makes it feel real that we are on this journey.

Welcome! I, too, suck at relinquishing control. ;-)

Want a personalized experience?

Waiting to Adopt Check-in 10/22

Re: Waiting to Adopt Check-in 10/22

Choose Another Board

Search Boards