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BFFN

SigmundsGirlSigmundsGirl
in Secondary IF

I tested ar 13 dpo and got a bffn, my temp dropped to right at the cover line and I started to spot. I don't know why I thought I'd get my BFP right after my m/c, but I am so upset.

This week we would have been having the anatomy scan and learning the gender. Instead we are starting the first of our final 3 cycles.

I got so sad when I was thinking about my DS being the only kid for all holidays, vacations, etc. My brother isn't married (and won't be) and my SIL can't have kids, so DS won't have any cousins either. I don't have cousins, but I have very fond memories of me and my brother at all kinds of family events. Even if we fought a lot, we were best of friends then, and didn't mind being the only kids. 

I feel sorry for myself and for DS. I know it isn't over yet, but I feel like it is. I'll be 38 next month and just can't keep this up much longer. Guess I'm just throwing a pity party. 

Dx: PCOS and short luteal phase
18 cycles (3 with our RE) - Metformin + Clomid + HCG booster did the trick!
BFP #1 6/22/09 EDD: 3/2/10 DS born: 3/8/10

TTC #2 since Dec 2011
BFP #2 7/8/12 EDD: 3/18/12 M/C @ 9w1d: 8/16/12

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Re: BFFN

  • kofmkgkofmkg member
    I'm so sorry.  Nothing I can say can take away the sadness or disappointment, but I'm so sorry.

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    Love, luck, and prayers to my BFPB Dr. SnowflakeBride

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  • cooperme2871cooperme2871 member
    I'm so sorry. hugs
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  • 74dragonfly74dragonfly member
    I'm so sorry it was a BFN. The Dr always tell me that you chances go up the first few cycles after m/c. Hopefully next month you will be successful. I really can relate to your posts. I am 38 too and can't do this much longer either. When I have a sad IF day I do something fun with my DD. It helps me take my mind off it. Sending hugs!




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  • SigmundsGirlSigmundsGirl
    Thanks, ladies. I knew you all would understand. Already having a better morning and DH, DS, and I have some fun things planned today. Then I'm going to go get a pedicure when they go to the grocery store. :-)

    Dx: PCOS and short luteal phase
    18 cycles (3 with our RE) - Metformin + Clomid + HCG booster did the trick!
    BFP #1 6/22/09 EDD: 3/2/10 DS born: 3/8/10

    TTC #2 since Dec 2011
    BFP #2 7/8/12 EDD: 3/18/12 M/C @ 9w1d: 8/16/12

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  • jeannaqueenajeannaqueena member
    I am so sorry.  BFN's are harder and harder each time.  I think about siblings for my DS too.  It makes it more heartbreaking.  I am thinking of you.
    TTC#1: 14 months on our own (did HSG, b/w, SA);
    BFP on Cycle 14--TWINS! Identical twin boys stillborn at 19wks(1/9/10)
    3 break cycles; took clomid 50mg, BFP #2 Beta #1 35, Beta #2 338!!! Owen was born 2/11/11! 
    TTC#2: 4 cycles on clomid: BFNs
    BFP #3: Cycle #5 100mg clomid; beta #1 21; beta #2 6=CP 
    Cycle #6 break cycle TTC no meds=BFN
    Cycle #7: 150 clomid+ovidril+IUI=BFN (switched to RE)
    Cycle #8: follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle #9 Forced break due to cyst
    Cycle #10 follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle #11 follistem+ovidril+TI=BFN
    Cycle#12 Forced break due to cyst, went on BCP; did repeat HSG, Saline U/S
    Cycle #13 IVF: Follistim/Menapur ER 11-30 11 eggs, 5 mature, 4 fertilized and 3dt on 12-3; BFN
    Cycle #14: IVF#2 lupron/follistim/menopur ER 1-22, 19 eggs, 14 fertilized, 5dt on 1-27, BFP!! beta 1: 63, beta 2: 119; EDD 10-15-13; 1 frozen embie
    Miracle Surprise BFP, EDD 10-1-15; saw HB great Betas, 11weeks lost baby MC at home
    Moved forward with FET transfered solo frostie on 6-4-15, beta 1: 315, beta 2: 738, u/s showed one baby on track EDD 2-21-16
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  • girlieface3girlieface3 member
    Dont give up. Try to feel positive. My cousin has had over 8 m/c, an eptopic pregnancy which left her with one tube, she tried IVF 3 times, her last cycle was cancelled bc none of her eggs were good and she is pregnant with 4th child. She is the reason why I know another angel is finding its way to me and you.
    DD born 12/30/09 TTC since 6/2011 2/2012 Clomid +Ovidrel+ti= bfn 3/2012 Menapur + follistim= cancelled, over stimulation 4/2012 Next cycle cancelled due to cysts 5/2012 on break TTC w/o meds 8/2012 Clomid & trigger w/ IUI=BFN 9/2012 Clomid & trigger w/ IUI = BFN
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  • ceebeeteeceebeetee member
    i'm so sorry.  sometimes you just gotta let yourself have that pity party, it helps get it out of your system so you can move on.  last week when I got AF i thought i was ok, then while on a trail run I had a minor crying breakdown, so it comes out somehow whether you want it to or not.  Glad your day is looking up a bit now though.    
    TTC baby #2 since July 2011, DX: low AMH
    BFP 1/21/13, blighted ovum m/c 2/12/13
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  • queenbonequeenbone member
    I'm so sorry. ((HUGE HUGS))
    Married 9-4-04

    ***PM me for my IF history***

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  • flows912flows912 member
    I'm sorry about your BFN ... it never gets easier. HUGS!
    Baby Birthday Ticker Ticker
    MPZ born June 2011
    TTC #2 ... Cycle 1-3: IUI = BFN | Cycle 4: IVF ... canceled but 3 snow babies
    Cycle 5: FET .. BFP! | EDD - 3/15/2014
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  • LSzwayaLSzwaya member
    I am so so sorry. 
    MC 4/09 at 6w2d 
    Rainbow Jude 
    born: 12/31/09
    Pre-E Induction at 36w4d
    11 Day NICU stay due to GBS infection

    TTC#2 10/2010
    M/C: 4/09/11 5w
    CP: 12/26/2011 
    CP: 1/28/2012 
    MMC: 4/16/2012 at 11w2d 
    Ectopic: 6/25/2012 MTX 07/03/12
    CP 11/24/2012 
    Rainbow Violet 
    born: 9/11/13

    All ALers welcome! 
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