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almost a year and still struggling with sleep

mpstochlinski8mpstochlinski8
in Attachment Parenting
help! Im having such a hard time with my twins, I feel like its acutally getting worse as they are getting older! they have become dependent on nursing to get to sleep and when they wake at night to get back to sleep which is leaving me sleepless & wiped out. I sleep in their room on a futon 98% of the time (other 2% was to see if I was the reason they kept waking up, didnt work) so I usually just take whomevers up into bed so I can try to fall asleep a little then once their asleep I put them back in crib and then the other baby usually is up within a few mins and this cycle just repeats on and on til morning. I've been trying the pantley pull out and its not working at all. they won't stop crying if they get up at teh same time unless I nurse them both. if DH comes in he cant even hold one if the other baby is content just being held, who ever he is holding will scream and reach for me so Im pretty much on my own at night & daytime. If they are both up I'll nurse at the same time til their asleep enough that I can transfer them to cribs. I really dont have it in me to use CIO and I dont know what else to try to break them of this habit and help them learn they can fall asleep other ways. anyone have any suggestions?? Im so tired I feel like I have sand in my eyes :( TIA
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Re: almost a year and still struggling with sleep

  • alliecat1234alliecat1234
    I don't have any advice, but just wanted to say wow...what a great job you are doing and hang in there!  That sounds really tough.  The only thing I could think of is maybe using a sleep consultant that does not do CIO?  I googled around some and thought about it for my baby. 
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  • Temp123197812503460Temp123197812503460
    I was there. And after it didn't get better at a year I was super depressed about it.We did end up doing CIO and night weaning. It wasn't as bad as I feared and they sstn now, it's amazing.We tried some gentle/non CIO options but nothing worked and in some ways I felt like it was harder for them to have the mixed message of I'm here but I'm not nursing you.
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  • lizardknitterlizardknitter member
    Have you considered night weaning?  I did the Jay Gordon method and it did cut down on wakings.  They didn't stop completely,  but went from 8-10 to 2-3 per night.  You are amazing for co-sleeping and BF'ing twins, no matter what.
    Me - 40, DH 34 Married 11 years, TTC since 7/09 3 rounds of Clomid > Vivienne born 5/28/11
    TTC#2 since 01/13 - 3 rounds of Clomid, 2 IUI w/injectibles, moving to IVF
    IVF #1 - Lupron 20 6/19, Follistim 225 6/21, Menopur 75 6/27, Trigger 6/30
    ER 7/2 (8R, 7M, 5F); ET 7/5 - 2 8 cell, grade 1 and 1 7 cell, grade 1 Stick babies, stick!
    BFP on HPT at 11dp3dt
    Beta #1 13dp3dt 787
    Beta #2 17dp3dt 6,007
    1st u/s 5w2d showing one "good" sac and 2-3 questionable
    2nd u/s 6w2d showing one baby with HR 128bpm
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    EDD March 25, 2014

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  • sadsadiesadsadie

    I love your "thing #1 and #2 pic". So awesome.

    I'm with PP, I think you may have to look at night weaning and some kind of controlled CIO. They're old enough to handle it, and it is quite evident that you are really struggling with the sleep deprivation, which means you aren't giving them the best parenting you can. When a family is out of balance like that, the family members have to sit down and discuss the various options and figure out what is going to give everyone (not just LO's) the best possible quality of life. While it is very noble to want to night nurse twins at this stage, I think you may have to compromise for something more realistic and sustainable that allows you to get rest and be a better mommy during the day.

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  • dfoley1111dfoley1111 member
    I have no advice because my son is up every 1-2 hours to nurse. But, I wanted to say: You are my hero for not only nursing for a whole year, but nursing twins!!! Good luck to you!
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  • mpstochlinski8mpstochlinski8
    thanks, sorry Im so late replying I havent had time to get online in a while. I have tried to night wean them from nursing and it seems to be helping them go longer stretches and here and there I can even skip nursing if they wake up at night ant just hold them til they sleep again. gonna just keep at it and I'll have to look up that method mentioned in a post here for some structure to it. :)
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