Babies vs. Toddlers

sharksfan · October 2012

In the ute lockdown post, everyone is saying how much they are enjoying the toddler stage much more than the newborn stage...am I the only freak that prefers the newborn stage?! R was a ridiculously easy baby, but he has been quite the handful the last few weeks-huge temper tantrums if he doesn't get his way, fighting diaper changes with flailing arms and legs, often resulting in poop flying everywhere, mood changes worse than me when I'm PMSing. I still love him more than anything in the world, but I am not enjoying this stage. I keep telling myself that it's just a stage or his molars coming in, but it's been 3 weeks...how long can this stage last?! He has moments of my funny, giggly, magic baby...but they don't last long, and that makes me sad...

[Deleted User] · October 2012

I miss my three month old who could smile and laugh, but still let me hold her as much as I wanted. And I could leave her on a blanket in the middle of the floor to go to the bathroom and, - get this - SHE WOULD STAY THERE. And I never had to make her food. And oh god, how she would fall asleep in the car. Glorious.

Wait, could she laugh? I already can't remember. Crying

Elsa1984 · October 2012

I was always a baby person until I had my own. Honestly, as much as I don't want her to grow up too fast, I cannot wait until she is around three or four. Then we can actually do stuff and it will be fun. We can go to the beach and she will actually play in sand instead of eat handfuls of it. We can go to the park she will play on the equipment, not eat the barkchips. We can take her bowling, putt putt golfing, she can play kiddie sports. I do miss the days where I could sit her in one spot and she would stay. She still will pretty much sleep anywhere....she slept through most of the county fair experience. And as much as the "why?" phase blows, I can't wait until she can talk and tell me what the heck she wants.

kagl08 · October 2012

Elsa1984:
I was always a baby person until I had my own.

This!! Exactly! I thought I would love the infant stage and miss it but I don't. I was "blessed" with horrible difficult infants. My DD had reflux, didn't STTN until 13 months. She had horrible separation anxiety from 5 months to 2 yrs and still has it bad sometimes. My DS was a preemie, had severe reflux, a MSPI, FTT... pretty much the whole 1st 6 months was spent with his screaming in pain. He is still not STTN!!

I have no desire to do this again. My DD is amazing at 2. She talks to me, we play real games, she understands, I can reason with her somewhat. She is a whole new level of easy. I have so much fun with her. Her age is SOOOO much better than then infant stage, or the early 1's. I feel like DS is still kinda hard right now. Maybe when he starts sleeping I will think differently.

KrisM86 · October 2012

I do think this stage is fun because LO is learning so much and beginning to really express herself and communicate well.

However, I find it much more frustrating than the baby phase. I do miss my content, smiling cuddly little baby when DD is throwing herself on the floor during a tantrum or screaming nonstop from behind the baby gate because, god forbid, I have to do something in the other room for 5 minutes.

This stage is perhaps all at once more rewarding and more challenging than when she was tiny.

cantalopes24 · October 2012

E was q great baby and I had nothing else going on in my life. My friends were all in their last semester of mostly out of town colleges so no one expected me to be anywhere, less bills, bigger debt to income ratio/disposable income, and I was off work for over 3 months and then worked part time some of which was from home. He rarely cried, was never sick and was so easy. Even when I was a single mom I loved it. Lo just cried all the time and I had a lot of other stressors so I never felt like I could focus on her.

pennysuedog · October 2012

I love all the stages but for me newborn stage is the easiest...keep in mind my babies have all been good nursers and not colicky.

To me this stage is one of the harder ones because she is naughty and you can not reason with her. I don't no about your kids but I have a biter, climber and slapper. She is awfully cute doing these things.

HappyAardvark · October 2012

I think of missing the nb stage the same way as being nostalgic when I look at pics of myself from my late teens/early 20s: I miss those years, but I am looking with rosecolored glasses, and have no desire to actually relive them.

I look at pics of Wes as a squishy baby and miss his tiny little cry, his coos, how he was so portable and would sleep in the infant carrier, which I could actually use bc he was so little. My brain glosses over the nighttime wakings, the every 2 hour feedings, the exhaustion, stress, pp flabbiness, and hormones. I enjoy him more and more every day as a person, because every day, more actual personality shines through.

A friend of mine with older kids said it best she told me it never gets easier each stage is hard in its own respect, until the day they move out of your house. But the older your kids get, in general, the more you enjoy them.

Mrs. Mo · October 2012

G was a complete nightmare. She was beyond colicky. I was lucky to get more than 2 hours of sleep (not ever continuous) in any given 24 hour period.

I love this stage. I love watching her learn and she can (and does) follow me when I leave the room. As a newborn (or even non-mobile baby), she would get really upset if she could not see me.

amyc216 · October 2012

It's funny b/c no matter what stage we're in, I feel like it's hard. Looking back, I don't even remember why I thought the NB stage was hard. DS was a good baby who rarely cried. Now he's just all over the place, getting into everything, and smiling at me when I say "no". I'm not sure which I prefer.... It was great when he was a NB b/c I loved holding him as he napped and I could do what I needed to do and he would just lay there. BFing was easier than fixing food. On the other hand, sometimes the awake times would be boring- singing songs and talking to a baby that didn't respond. At least now he can interact with me, hug me, and play with me.

jonnygurl76 · October 2012

Every stage is hard in its own way, my DD could wear out a nun. The temper tantrums make me want to rip my hair out and I day dream about running away from home. Then there is DS who is NONSTOP during all of his waking hours and is exhausting.

So yes, I miss my snuggly little babies when a boob would make them happy and they couldn't talk/screech back.

LCass · October 2012

I can totally see both sides of it. Lily has always been an easy, happy-go-lucky baby. For the first three weeks, she had gas and cried from 11pm-2am, but she slept so well the rest of the time that it wasn't even that bad (I had two meltdowns in those three weeks, that's it). In fact, she was apparently an exceptionally sleepy newborn I've come to realize. We would see her eyes for a grand total of maybe 10 minutes each day. Most of my day consisted of having her sleep on my chest or nursing her (and we never had any problems with bfing, so that wasn't a stress either), so I got lots of quiet, calm, snuggle time. I totally miss that, and I doubt that future babies will be that sleepy and calm. If she'd been a more difficult baby, or the middle-of-the-night screaming had continued for months on end, I can imagine that the last thing I'd want to experience again would be the newborn stage.

The hissy fits now are definitely a challenge. Most of the time, I can see the funny side of it (it's so melodramatic it's actually really cute), but by the afternoon when she's already thrown a bunch of them and I can't get anything done I'm so over finding it amusing. Diaper changes are a pain in the butt at least 50% of the time - but on the plus side, there are far fewer of them than when she was a newborn. Like others have said, it's much more fun with how interactive she is now and getting to watch her learn and her little (BIG) personality come shining through more and more each day. I know we're in for a rough couple of years as she learns to talk back (when she starts saying "no" we're in for it!) and we have to try to teach her rules, politeness, etc.

I guess every stage is both the best and worst. You've finally mastered the challenges of the previous stage and poof, now there are new challenges, so they seem harder in comparison. But you've also got the beautiful memories of what came before and the enjoyment of how much they've learned and grown.

lkm2006 · October 2012

I miss the newborn stage just because it was easier. I would MUCH prefer the stage we are in now. I love having a baby that can interact, walk and move on his own so I don't have to hold them on the time, it's so much easier going out to a store, my list could go on and on.

memo9 · October 2012

overture:
I miss my three month old who could smile and laugh, but still let me hold her as much as I wanted. And I could leave her on a blanket in the middle of the floor to go to the bathroom and, - get this - SHE WOULD STAY THERE. And I never had to make her food. And oh god, how she would fall asleep in the car. Glorious.
Wait, could she laugh? I already can't remember.

Yessssss!

Scramblersmom · October 2012

jonnygurl76:
Every stage is hard in its own way, my DD could wear out a nun. The temper tantrums make me want to rip my hair out and I day dream about running away from home. Then there is DS who is NONSTOP during all of his waking hours and is exhausting.
So yes, I miss my snuggly little babies when a boob would make them happy and they couldn't talk/screech back.

This pretty much sums it up for me. I hated some things when DS was a baby such as not getting much sleep, having to hold his bottle and feed him for 30 mins when I had to get ready for work, not knowing why he was crying, etc. However, I did love that he would at least fall asleep often during the day for short intervals so that I had time to do housework, get a bite to eat or make a couple of fun calls.

Now, DS is all of the things you have described about your LO. He throws a fit when changing his diaper, cries if I am more than 2 feet away from him, throws a fit when he doesn't get his way, etc. On the other hand, it is so nice that he can feed himself while I get ready for work, he can giggle, say some words, act goofy and make us laugh a lot, and still snuggles on occasion. I also love seeing the wonder and amazement in his eyes.

JG said it well "Every stage is hard in its own way" and may I add, "and great too".

blu-eyedwife · October 2012

LBB was a fairly easy baby, but he is so much more fun now! Now he still has all the same attributes as he did (loves to be held, will fall asleep in my arms, smiles and laughs all the time) but as a bonus, he is interactive and in some ways easier to deal with (doesn't scream in the car, I can leave the room without him freaking out, because he'll come find me or play with his toys on his own)

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